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CHAPTER 135
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A vow of hate CHAPTER 136
I stepped beside Christian’s bed, my legs trembling, tears clouding my eyes. I signed the forms where the doctor indicated, anxious to get to Christian. The doctor had explained how much machinery Christian was hooked up to and warned me not to panic. “It’s all there to help him, Mrs. Walker. The machines are doing the job his body can’t do right now.”I heard what he said. I carefully processed it. So I thought I was prepared, but I wasn’t.The room buzzed with activity, the entire team focused on getting Christian upstairs to the OR. I knew I only had mere seconds before they whisked him away. I stepped forward, laying my hand on his forearm—one of the few areas not covered in wires or bandages. He was cool to the touch…and unresponsive. I stared at him, the tears streaming down my cheeks. His handsome face was a mass of bruises, barely recognizable with the swelling. A jagged cut stretched horizontally over his left eyebrow and disappeared into his hair that had been shaved. A brea
A vow of hate CHAPTER 137
Dr. Fletcher walked through the door, exhaustion written on his face. He pulled off his surgical cap and ran a hand through his hair. Grandpa, Sarah, Mia, and I all stood as a unit when he approached. Sarah wrapped her hand around mine, her grip tight. She had been a rock for me the entire time, refusing to be anything except positive, despite the inner turmoil she must be going through too.I tried to read Dr. Fletcher’s face. I had no clue what he was going to tell me, but his expression was grave. My stomach clenched, and I had to reach for Grandpa's hand as well to stop from falling. Dr. Fletcher stopped in front of me. “He pulled through,” he stated simply.Hot tears spilled down my face.“He isn’t out of the woods yet,” he cautioned. “There was a lot of damage. He took a substantial blow to his spine and his head.” I could only nod, unable to speak. Christian was still alive. He was still here—fighting. “He’ll be in a special ICU and closely monitored once he leaves recovery. In
A vow of hate CHAPTER 138
The waiting room upstairs was much quieter. Sarah and Mia left to go see Valerie and get a few things for me. Tina insisted that Valerie stay overnight in her own home, stating she could be with her for a few days without issue. I felt bad. Very bad. Tina was supposed to be on a one month leave, and now… this.“Valerie will be happier surrounded by her own things and her routine,” she insisted when I spoke with her. “I’ll be praying for Christian, Hazel. For all of you. I’ll take care of your daughter. You take care of him.”Her barely concealed distress tipped me over the edge, and I shut myself in the washroom and fought through a panic attack, begging and pleading with God for another miracle and for the strength to get through this for him. Christian got through the surgery—now I needed him to come back to me.In whatever state he could.Together, we would handle it. The other option was unthinkable.Grandpa sat, his fingers flying over his phone, constantly checking on me. I kept
A vow of hate CHAPTER 139
The next couple of days passed in a monotony of repeated moments. Christian was monitored closely, his vitals checked, tests done, Dr Fletcher coming and going. I got to know the team of hardworking, dedicated nurses. I came and went, staying longer than I was supposed to, but they turned a blind eye to the fact that I stood beside Christian’s bed, holding his hand and talking for hours on end. I stepped out of the way when needed, but otherwise, I was by his side. I had no idea if it was because he pretty much owned the hospital and was their boss or if it was because they just felt sorry for me, but whatever it was, it worked in my favour. Grandpa and Sarah came in briefly. Sarah had cried at the sight of her son hooked up to so many machines, and they both insisted on my taking a quick break. Grandpa had arranged a place for me to shower and change, and I called Valerie everytime. Tina stayed with her when Grandpa and Sarah were here, or Mia stepped in if needed. It was a great com
A vow of hate CHAPTER 140
I sat, staring at the cold cup of coffee in front of me. My half-eaten sandwich was pushed aside. It tasted like dust, and I had no appetite. Despite what Alan had advised, I couldn’t eat. I would try later. Alan’s words kept running through my head. Christian’s recovery—the difficulties we faced. The way our life together would change. Everything I knew, everything that was us, wouldn’t exist anymore. At least not right away—in fact, perhaps never.It depended on what happened when Christian woke up. If his mind was affected. If he was still Christian—or an altered version of the man I loved. I rubbed a weary hand over my face, one thing certain in my mind. Whatever happened, whatever the result was, I still loved him. I would always love him, and somehow, we would find our way through all of this together.I had texted Grandpa, Mia and Sarah to let them know Christian was being moved and that I would send the information as soon as I had it. They responded with encouraging wor
A vow of hate CHAPTER 141
As he promised, Maddox didn’t keep me from the hospital for long. We returned as soon as I got a message saying Christian had been moved. Maddox followed me into his new room, a silent companion, there to support me. I went directly to the side of the bed. There were still machines whirring and beeping away, but there were fewer of them. Christian had obviously been given a sponge bath, his hair damp around his ears where they had wiped with the wet cloth. The room was large and bright with two comfortable-looking chairs and even a small sofa. The usual kind of hospital bathroom was in the corner, and the walls the same green, but it was private and had a window that looked over the street.I cupped Christian’s cheek. “Hello, my darling. I was gone for a while, but I’m back. You look so much better. And look who I found!”Maddox stood at the end of the bed, his hands wrapped around the metal frame. “Hey, Christian’s,” he stated easily, although I saw the stress around his eyes. “Don’t
A vow of hate CHAPTER 142
I carried her inside, setting her carefully on my hip while she showed Sarah her lamb, and I inhaled the scent of her hair. The feel of my baby snuggled into my chest made tears sting my eyes, and I had to bow my head to hide them from her. Valerie was still a baby, and she was still too perceptive not to notice. “Why you cry, Mommy?” “I missed you,” I sniffed. She looked confused. “I was wight hewe.” I forced a smile, brushing away the wetness under my eyes. “I know. How silly of Mommy.” Sarah cupped my cheek affectionately. “I have her dinner ready. I knew you’d want to feed her. Go upstairs with her, and I’ll bring it. You have a little time with her.”“Thank you,” I murmured, not trusting myself to say much else right now. My emotions were too raw. Sarah, being Sarah, understood. “Of course, dear girl.” Upstairs, I settled in the nursery they had set up for Valerie. Valerie had spent weekends with her grandmother in the past, so it made sense
A vow of hate CHAPTER 143
My anger didn’t abate. It grew. For six days, it simmered and twisted in my gut. Six days as I waited by my husband’s bed for him to wake up. To open his dark brown eyes and look at me. Smile. Frown. Groan. Anything.The medical staff told me to be patient. To remain positive. Both emotions were slowly draining from me. For six days, he remained trapped in a world beyond me. Where I couldn’t reach him. His chest fell and rose with his breathing. The full oxygen mask had been replaced by cannulas, his breathing tube gone. Thick stubble grew on his face, hiding some of the cuts. His bruises were changing, fading from black and blue to yellow and purple. His expression was peaceful, his body unmoving and unresponsive. When we were alone, I wept, begging and pleading with him to wake up. When other people were around, I remained calm, locking down my emotions, putting on a strong, brave, positive face, saying he would wake soon. Be with us.Still, he slept.Inside, I despaired.And b
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