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Never Again

Author: D Fox
last update Last Updated: 2022-10-08 18:43:03

Mike’s entire world tilted. He was imagining things. Killian couldn’t be there. He had thought he wasn't that drunk, maybe he had been wrong and had ... No, no. 

Mike thought. I am fine. 

Killian was there. He knew it because his wolf knew it too. 

His mate was standing there, across the street 

Mike sobered up instantly once he realized it. 

They were only a few meters apart, waiting for the other to make the first step. It was Killian who did it. Killian walked over to where Mike was standing and came to stand in front of him. 

“Killian, what…”

Mike began, but Killian interrupted him.

“This can’t happen. Never again.”

Mike nodded, confused. 

“Okay.”

“We shouldn’t be meeting, not like this. You are my bodyguard and that remains. But that's all. There can't be anythign else happening between us. I can’t come to your apartment or you to mine. “

Then Killian looked up at Mike.

“Never”.

His eyes were so dark, almost black in the night.

Some of the people in the bar were still smoking or drinking outside, laughing and telling drunken jokes. They were all out on the street, but all of that was just background noise, as if all those men and women there belonged somewhere else. Somewhere they couldn’t touch them and it was just him and Killian.

“Michael?”

Killian was watching him, expecting and Mike blinked against the rising threat of him losing control. 

He knew what Killian was saying. And it wasn’t like they had promised anything to each other. 

Then why was this feeling like a rejection.

Rejection 

Mike’s mind provided. 

His wolf stirred.

He is rejection you. 

He is not rejecting me," Michael thought, " he is not rejecting me, because he doesn’t know about the whole mate wolf thing, or anything. hat rejection are you even talking about" 

His hand closed in fists and in his mind, Mike was running in circles, but he shook his head to scatter the thoughts and said

“Okay, Killian. Never again.”

“Good.” 

Then Killian grabbed the lapels of Mike’s jacket and pulled him closer, Killian’s lips brushing Mike’s.

“Let’s go.”

Killian said and let go of Mike’s jacket, turning his back on him and heading down the street, not turning around.

***

A crash, followed by nother. Something, most likely a glass falling on the floor and crashing. Another rattle.

Mike’s back hit the wall and the door slammed shut somewhere behind him. 

They were fumbling with clothes, belts and jackets . Mike's jacket landed on the floor heavy and before he could put himself back together, Killian was all over him again. 

Killian pushed Mike harder against the wall and tore his T-shirt front.

It was dark, but Mike could see very well the messy, disheveled hair, Killian’s dilated pupils, he could hear his mate's heartbeat, syncing as if  with his own. 

"Wait, wat..." Mike said, his hands closing around Killian's shoulders to stop him. 

"Wait. " 

"What is it?"

Killian was frowning at him in the darkness. "No one has follwed us, right.  "

"No."

"Then why did you stop?"

Mike lifted a hand and his fingertips brushed Killian’s lips very lightly.

They were both breathing heavily, and Killian paused only for a second before he grabbed Mike again.

Killian kissed him hard, fingers digging in Michael’s shoulders almost painfully . Killian was kissing him, but at the same time it felt like he was fighting - with what, Mike couldn't tell. 

Mike broke the kiss and searched Killian’s eyes in the darkness.

The only light that was coming inside the room was from the street lamps, and the bars that were on the first floors of the buildings here. But even in this run down place, the fading yellowish light was dancing on Killian's face and he looked stunning, even here. 

“Hey. “ 

Mike whispered, running a hand over Killian’s face slightly. 

“We’re not fighting. “ 

Killian froze, confused. 

Then Mike leaned in and kissed him very, very slowly. Killian relaxed in the kiss too, and Mike smiled against his lips. 

“See?”

“What?”

“Isn’t it better this way?”

Killian flinched and it was as if something flipped inside him again. 

He began kissing him harder again, hands going for the button of Mike's jeans. Killian opened them and fell down to his knees. 

This time Mike glued himself to the wall by himself and watched Killian perplexed as his mate began opening his zipper.

"Wait, wait. " 

Mike placed his palms over Killian's beautiful hands and squeezed him lightly to stop him from continuing. 

"Don't you want to go somewhere more...." Mike's mind was buzzing, of all the things he had imagined and wanted with Killian, getting a blowjob in the hallaway was the last thing he wanted. Mike had never been a romantic, or anything, but this was Killian. He wasn't just going to do it here, it hd to be.. different. 

"Comfortable?" Mike said eventually, "do you want to go to the bedroom, or..."

"You don't like this?" Killian looked up at him, "Do you want to hit me?"

"Hit?...Why woud I ..."

"Isn't this how it works with guys?" 

Killian was still watching him, hands stilled underneath Mike's. 

"You don't want to show me you're stronger?"

Mike stopped. Dead in his tracks. 

Killian was asking him for real. It wasn't some role play. Killian was actually expecting Mike to say yes. 

Mike's heart clenched, sinking.

Then he had to close his eyes and take a very slow breath to stop himself from actually going and killing whoever showed Killian that he had to be hurt if he was going to be with someone.

Michael remembered the bruises he had seen on Killian's skin before. He had always thought Killian had liked it. 

But now seeing Killian, being here and looking so vulnerable, he realized Killian had just never known anything else. 

"Tell me I am a filthy..."

"No."

Mike said instantly, lowering himself so that he knelt next to Killian.

"Don't ever say that. " Mike leaned forward and kissed Killian's forehead, then his cheek.

"But this is what I am, I am..."

"You're so beautiful, "

Mike breathed against Killian's neck and felt his mate shiver. 

"You're the most beautiful person I've met, Killian," 

he continued, kissing Killian's neck.

Mike had been with many guys before, but he had rarely spoken to them much. Rarely had he been with someone more than once or twice, but he had never wanted to hurt any of them, even of some of them had been into those things.

He would do it, if they really asked for it, but nothing beyond a play. Ever. The thought of hurting Killian - that was a different matter. 

It was then and there Mike swore he was going to make Richard pay- before or after finishing this mission. Even if that meant killing him. 

Mike kissed Killian one last time and stood up. 

"Will you come with me?"

He said and smile.

"Where?"

Killian asked, but followed. 

"You'll see." Mike smiled and kissed him before they headed to the improvised bedroom in Mike's apartment. 

D Fox

Hey all! Thank you for being here. This is Not the end, i think the best for those is yet to come and the story continues here- https://www.goodnovel.com/book_info/31000390461/Werewolf/Chasing-The-Monster-The-Secret-Agent-s-Mafia-Mate-Book-Two I hope you like it and thank you for reading it! <3

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  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   Epilogue

    Killian The night is warm and I inhale the August air deeply. Summers are rarely this warm in the UK, but the suburbs of London are sometimes an exception. We have been here for a few months now since we came back and I feel like it’s been only a few days. The moon is bright above the woods and the only light around is coming from it. The huge full moon, handing on the dark sky. Besides that, I don’t see anything. Not even stars. I glance around. “Mike?” I call, but I still don’t hear anything. I start walking, my feet threading on branches when I hear a snap and I pause, looking around. “I told you I wanted to see you “ I call in the quiet of the night. He is still nowhere near. “Very funny, “ I say, out loud. “Fine, then. I am leaving. You can play tricks on me all night if you want, or run wherever. Just make sure you come back before five. “ Still silence. I exhale, disappointed. “Or whenever you decide to. “ I came to the woods looking for him. Mike comes hu

  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   END: Tamed Wild Animals and a Few Words

    Michael “Did you see the bears? Please, Killian, come. “ Ashley grabbed Killian by the hand and dragged him to the cage of the bear. Michal was watching them as his niece dragged Killian around and kept talking excitedly. Once they were in front of the cage, Killian lifted her so that she could see the animals better. The weather was nicer than usual for this time of the year and they had decided to spend it in the zoo. They were meeting Jesse and Edward later. And tomorrow, they were all leaving. “She loves him, “ Cat said as they watched Ashley take Killian to another cage. “He is just very patient and listens to her stories. “ Mike smiled. “Hey. I’m sorry Liam couldn’t get home. “ “It’s fine, “ his sister waved a dismissive hand, “He has been spending a lot of time on the job recently. “ “It’s one of those jobs, you know. “Mike said, kicking a small stone off the ground. His sister was silent and he followed her eyes. She was looking at Killian. “I understand why

  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   My Happiness

    Michael Killian was kissing him. Mike closed his arms around his mate and they both went into the room, fumbling with the keys and everything on their way. They didn't have the time to turn the lights on, Mike wasn’t letting go of Killian even for a second. “Wait “ Kilian breathed against his lips. “It’s a mistake. You were right. I have no right to come and…. It's the adrenaline. ““You always talk more when you are nervous. “ Mike leaned in again but Killian pressed his palm on Mike’s chest lightly and Mike stopped. “What is it?”Mike asked when a bad feeling began creeping in. “Wait, no.. are you seeing someone?”Killian looked at him. Despite the darkness, Killian met his eyes. “Do you think I am seeing someone? ““I hope not. ““No. I am not. ““Then what is it?”“You were right. About what you said last time. “ “I said it because I… I missed you. And I was mad. I was mad because it took so long before I saw you again. ““Are you sure?”“Never been more sure. “ Mike trie

  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   The Ugliest

    Michael The mischievous look on Killian’s face made him look even more attractive. Mike felt his wolf react to the proximity too. “You’ve done this before, haven’t you?” Mike asked. “A few times. “ “Damn it, Killian. It’s dangerous. ““Not if you plan it. ““Still dangerous. ““Do you trust me?”Killian asked. Mike remembered that time in Paris when it had been him who’d asked that question and Killian had said yes. “I do, yes. “ “Okay. ““Okay. But I am coming with you. “ “No. “ Killian said evenly. “Yes. “ Everyone was watching them. Mike could only imagine how weird all of this looked to them, especially considering all of Mike’s new colleagues thought he and Killian had never met before. But neither of them spoke. “We can stay like this all day. “Mike said. “You aren’t going by yourself. “He was not changing his mind and Killian knew it. That’s why his mate pushed away from the table and said. “Fine. So, here's how we’ll do it. “ ***They were inside the huge ma

  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   My Five Years

    Michael “Michel says this colour is red. “Ashley said as she sat down at her drawing table and lifted her painting to show it to Killian. “Hm…”Killian sat on the carpet next to her. “He doesn’t know the colours. “ Killian said very seriously. “I know! And I know them all. “ Ashley declared, “And I can also count and read. ““Really? “ Kilian smiled. “How old are you?”“Almost five. “She said proudly. Mike sat on the sofa, still close to them. “But I know more things than Michael. ““I am sure you do. “ Killian laughed. “I don’t need two of you, okay? “ Mike muttered and leaned back against the soft cushions. “I don’t know how to draw the feathers. “Ashley admitted, frowning at her sheet. “Wait, let me show you. “Killian took one of her pencils and started drawing. Mike wasn't breathing. He sat up and watched Killian draw, Ashley was watching Killian as if he was a real prince. “You are staring at him the same way.” His wolf said and Mike closed his eyes. “Yeah.

  • Chasing The Monster The Secret Agent's Mafia Mate Book Two   Another Dull Tuesday

    Michael “Damn it.” He hissed and the blood trickled. Mike pushed the blade under the running water and looked up at himself in the mirror. The cut wasn’t that deep but it stung enough to be uncomfortable. Mike washed his face, tore some paper and pressed it to the cut. “Just perfect.” He muttered as he saw the scar on his chin was more obvious now that he didn’t have the beard. Mike had also cut his hair and changed into more presentable clothes- the only better clothes he had which weren’t huge hoodies and jeans. He pressed the paper one last time and threw it away when he checked the time. “Shit.” He washed, checked if everything was off and rushed toward the office. He made it almost on time. Almost because there was always so much traffic and making himself look presentable took longer than he’d expected. It had been a very long while since he’d last cared about how he looked. The moment he rushed upstairs to the office, he was washed over by a very powerful wave.

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