12. B E H I N D T E R R O R

"Almost everything is resolved with a blast, a bullet, and one look toward the sky."

NABESHIN has been not on his own for several days after Shan dead. He could barely sleep and had no appetite. There was no time that Shan's memories of him in life and still with him frequently haunt his mind. It seems that his fate was stingy because only Shan, whom he considered the only member of the family, was gone ... and the pain was in a way he had never imagined.

"Is this the In exchange of destiny on me?" Nabeshin silently talked to himself as he lay and stared at the ceiling of his room as if he could see from there Shan's beautiful face smiling at him with sweetness.

Later he slowly sat down on the bed, he slowly glanced at Shan's shoulder bag. The young man's hands were still shaking when he finally reached out and touched them. He stared at it for a long time, until he opened it on purpose. Nabeshin smiled bitterly as he took out one by one and looked at the items inside the woman's bag.

Make-up, a lavander nail polish, personal hygiene kits such as alcohol and tissue are inside. Shan takes care much of her body, just like how much it cared him for and appreciated when she was alive.

Nabeshin's heart sank as he remembered the last time she called his name. He quickly hugged the shoulder bag as if she was the one he was hugging.

"I love you, Shan ... I love you and I'm sorry."

When Nabeshin got tired of crying, he slowly removed the shoulder bag.

He has to fix himself, later someone will pick him up to go to the studio for the ZNT fan event.

He was about to leave the bed when he noticed something stuck inside Shan's shoulder bag. He took it slowly, astonishment on his face as he read his full name on the back of the envelope. He immediately inspected it, he saw some photos there, pictures where Toji was with him. He quickly opened a letter with photographs.

Something heavy feels seemed to hit Nabeshin's chest while reading that, he wouldn't have thought that he was this important to his friend. Once again, she burst into tears, and immediately put the photos and letter in the envelope.

He decided before going to Toji he had to go somewhere first.

Mixed with nervousness and longing for him, Nabeshin decided to shop for souvenirs first. After shopping, he immediately left, a smile on his lips. But there was still the heavily feeling on his chest that he would probably carry until his death.

IMMEDIATELY, an elderly nun met him when it noticed that he had parked his car in front of the orphanage. He carefully examined the large building, old but still in good condition, it had obviously been taken care of.

"Good morning Sir Nabeshin, it's a pleasure you just call first. Atleast we have prepared a little party."

Nabeshin smiled at what he heard.

"Let it go, it's not important to me, just what you can handle," the young man replied to the woman.

He saw that the nun smiled and looked at him carefully, which Nabeshin said slightly.

"It's true what Toji told us. You're just so kind, Sir Nabeshin."

Nabeshin quickly looked at the nun as if he had a heavy feels when he spoke again.

"Is Toji always here? Can you tell me a story, Mother Superior?" There was anticipation in Nabeshin's voice.

The nun returned her smile.


Nabeshin was leaving the orphanage when he slowly glanced at the building. The nuns and children Toji was helping were still outside, waiting for him to leave. He had already started to start the car but before he could start the car he made a farewell wave first.

While driving, the stories and events at the orphanage he went to came to his mind again. Toji has been supporting it for a long time, and even when he disappeared, he still remained supportive, and even though he  could no longer go to the orphanage, he continued to provide funds through his private bank account.

His burden made that fact even more important. He felt even more pity as one by one approached and hugged him tightly by the children considered Toji's family.

Only a tear of remorse continued to run down his cheek as he continued to make his way to Toji's hide out. Where his friend is still there.

It was almost dusk when he got there, with the darkness of the surroundings as he looked back.


HE could hear Von and Toji talking from the first room. As time goes on he continues to be consumed by his own anger, jealousy and illness. He couldn't deny so much the pain he felt at the fact that something had already happened to the two, that everything Von showed him was also due to Toji's request. All of that means only one thing...

Von just felt mercy for him!

He carefully listened outside Von's door.

"If we just stay away can we, Toji?" Nabeshin heard Von say to his friend.

When Toji didn't say a word, he left the stand completely.

Nabeshin's mind went dark. He hurried to the kitchen, immediately grabbed the handle of a long, sharp knife from the bribe. He could clearly see the blade and sharpness of it, good at what he would do. The knife gleamed from the darkness as the moon peeked out the window. He hurried to walk, he hid in the dark from outside Von's room. Later he saw Toji come out the door. He immediately approached without even making any noise because even his breathing was under his control.

"Your promise Von, keep it ..." He heard Toji say.

He saw Von's tears finally dripping, at the same time as he nodded. He quickly stabbed Toji, he didn't let him fight back. Nabeshin made a stab in the back of him, the knife piercing his heart. He immediately vomited blood. Even though his friend was already lying on the floor, he continued to stab Toji.

Until he was completely tired. Nabeshin was panting and breathing deeply. Toji's whole face was stained with blood, his hands and clothes were also stained with his fresh blood.

Its blood flooded the floor.

His eyes turned to Von who remained just dumbfounded staring at him, he even glanced over when he heard Shan's sigh on the side.

Nabeshin quickly glanced at Toji's lifeless body on the floor.

Only the full moon outside witnessed what happened that night ...


Nabeshin blinked when he felt the gentle breeze, he thought the summer was over. The snow will start tonight ... the arrival of the winter season.

Until he just realized the snow was pouring around him. He glanced at the vacant lot behind their hide out. After that he immediately walked inside the building. Her every step seemed so slow in those moments that even her breathing made it hard for him to grope. He entered the room where they made his friends the ZNT project back then.

Happy and sad memories of the past passed through Nabeshin's mind. He slowly walked to the table, where a picture frame sat, the picture placed there was the one he and Toji had taken on the beach. She was completely overwhelmed with sadness when Nabeshin watched the lively smile of her friends in the photo, that even the cracked frame did not affect its beauty.

He immediately took the cellphone out of his pocket and then connected the call to a private call.

He heard a voice, he quickly told it what it needed to do next.

Slowly he put down the holding device, he walked over to a table. Where he hid something when he and Shan finally went there. He waved his hand and gripped that cold thing tightly. He smiled bitterly. She remembered the last conversations she had with Von, words that added to the guilt she had carried over the years.

"Twelve has never been mad at you, Nine ... he loves you so much."

He kept closing his eyes, until Nabeshin pointed the muzzle of the gun at his temple. The memories of him and Toji when he was still alive and they were still together flashed through his mind. Memories that can't be matched by anything else ...

"Sorry, Twelve ... sorry!" Nabeshin apologized bitterly.

After Nabeshin said that, a gunshot rang out all over the place along with the sounds of footsteps coming to the room where he was ...

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