MATEO
When I wake up, Kieran’s gone. I don’t think much of it – today we have a match against our rival school, Milton High. It’s the first one of the season too, so the pressure’s on, especially for Kieran. He’s our star striker, whereas I’m only a defender. He may be barely 5’4”, but he’s the fastest player on our team. If anything, his height is an advantage, as most opposing players don’t think much of him until he’s quite literally stealing the ball from your feet. He’s fearless like that – utterly unafraid of collisions since most people will back off at the sight of him flying at them.
I had made the mistake of underestimating him at tryout
KIERANIt had been a week since Mateo and I unofficially-officially started this thing. He had explained to me that he didn’t want to tell anyone yet, especially since Lana was still avoiding our group like the plague. She still greets us in the hallways though, and Mateo had told me that they’re in the process of reconciliation, which is all the more reason to keep this under wraps. I respect that, but it’s getting harder and harder to hide how much I like him. Our friends have noticed that I’ve been happier lately, and every time they ask why, I want to blurt the words out. I’m so happy with him, even if I’m not technically with him yet.
MATEOKieran is so pretty.For some reason, Rob isn’t here this period, so Kieran and I get to sit side-by-side. There’s only the three of us in Chemistry, but the desks are for two, so we’ll usually rotate who sits alone, and it was supposed to be my turn today. It’s unlike Rob to wag, but I pay it no mind. I’m glad things have worked out in my favour, as I haven’t seen Kiki all morning and I’m not sure I could last another class without him.Maybe it’s worrying how codependent I am a
MATEOLucas laughs at something Kieran says, and I have to fight the urge to tell him to shut up. The pitch of his laugh is obnoxiously high, and he hasn’t stopped doing it all afternoon. The two of them have been inseparable all day because he “needs a guide” and whatever other bullshit he fed to Kieran. Apparently, the two of them had been best friends in middle school, but he really should be clued into the fact that he’s been replaced. I can’t believe I agreed to this, but regardless, I’m sat alone on the opposite side of a table to the two of them in some shitty diner waiting for my food. Kieran and Lucas already got theirs, as the owner remembered the two of them and made sure to serve his “best customers” straight away.From what I’ve picked up,
KIERANWitnessing an awkward exchange is possibly the worst fate there is. I pick at the thread-bare cushions of Mateo’s couch as the birthday boy himself opens his front door. When he had gotten Lana’s text, he had grimaced and told me he wasn’t actually sure if she was coming until this moment. I’m a little surprised myself, but I guess it’d be worse if she didn’t show. The two of them have spent nearly every birthday together – I think the one exception was the time Mateo’s family visited Italy for all of December.I watch as Mateo steps aside to let Lana in, but the girl goes in for a hug. Mateo had lamented to me about th
MATEOThe grandfather clock in the corner of our dining room ticks and tocks incessantly. I watch the rusted silver pendulum swing back and forth and focus on the way the cuckoo bird pops out to announce midnight, it’s mechanical whir filling up the entire room. As it pops back into the wooden structure, my dad ceases his angry pacing.He’s been wearing a path in our floor for the past ten minutes, silent ever since he came into my room. He had roused Kieran and me from our sleep and got Mum to drive him home without so much as a reason why. The two of us had exchanged a glance before he left – Kiki with one of confusion and concern, and me with a “don’t worry, I’ll tell you later,” sort of compromise.
KIERANMateo has been staying with me for the past week.He hasn’t told me much about what happened that night – only snippets here and there. All I know for sure is that his parents found out about that he likes guys somehow. He didn’t take anything other than his phone with him, and he’s been living out of the drawer of clothes he keeps at mine. I’m not sure whether he was kicked out or if he ran away, but it’s evident that they didn’t react well. He’s not the same kind, gentle boy I knew. Something in him has broken.The first few nights, he was distant. He acted like I wasn’t there at all – as if he was
MATEOLucas’ high-pitched whine of a laugh bounces around the walls of Kieran’s room like a helium balloon. Kieran’s actually in the next room over, but it still manages to pierce through. I grab a pillow and chuck it over my face, squeezing it against my ears in an attempt to drown him out, but then Kieran starts giggling. His laugh is exactly that – a child’s giggle. It bubbles out of him, and you can’t help but smile too.I let the pillow fall to the side and let the sound wash over me. It’s rare, these days.I’m not nearly as blind, deaf nor as naïve as he thinks I am. I know that they’re talking about m
MATEOI jolt awake, cold water dripping down my face. My head spins from moving too quickly, and when the black spots fade away, I squint against the harsh light to see Alex standing in front of me with an empty glass in hand. The pounding in my skull strengthens as he starts yelling at me.He’s too disgusted to look at me. He paces back in forth in front of his couch which I’m lying on, hands angrily gesticulating. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You’re a piece of shit, you know that? You promised me that you wouldn’t be a dick to Kieran, and here we fucking are! What happened to the whole last-person-in-the-world-to-have-a-problem-with-him bullshit? I can’t believe Kieran put up with you for thes