Erased

PART 1

It was his face, his handsome face, that appeared in my line of vision. The look he was giving me was alluring, captivating my entire being. But a tinge of sadness tainted it, making no sense. 

Just like everything else, I couldn't grasp what was going on. And most of all, I couldn't remember who he was.

--

My eyes fluttered open, slowly adapting to the sudden assault of brightness. 

"Kate?" my mother's voice sounded relieved.

When I fully regained my vision, I saw her worried expression as her face hovered above mine.

Tears were spilling from her beautiful browns, confusing me while I attempted to understand what was going on.

Beside her was my sister, bearing the same look and so as my father. I tried to sit up and reassure them that I was okay; no need for them to worry about me.

But that would be a blatant lie.

Before I heard the beeping from a nearby heart monitor, I realized I was lying in a hospital bed. The smell of antiseptic hit me next, followed by the weight of the dextrose in my right hand.

I tried to hack my brain to figure out what had happened for me to land here, causing my family to wear the same grave expressions that I didn't want to see. 

It was frustrating, disappointing and something else. My chest felt tight, and my body resorted to panicking. However, one look at each of my family gave pause to the natural reaction I was about to succumb to.

Sadly, my efforts to recollect the incident before waking up in a hospital were in vain. I couldn't remember anything. 

No matter how much I tried, there was no picture I could paint. No single object or sound helped me retrieve at least part of what might have happened.

Somehow, there was this unseen force blocking me from recovering even the tiniest detail of what appeared to be an accident.

In truth, I wasn't sure what I was truly feeling. I couldn't even decide if I was in pain or if the affliction tormenting me was psychological.

I attempted to speak, to ask either of my family to tell me how I got here and why but a doctor suddenly walked inside the room and stood at the foot of my bed carrying a pen and some papers interrupting my opening. He smiled upon seeing me stare.

"Oh, it's good to see you're finally awake!" he exclaimed.

I blinked at him, confused and unable to follow what this was all about. 

"Have I been unconscious that long?" I heard the strain in my voice.

"Just a single day, nothing much to miss." 

The doctor glanced at my family as if asking whether it was alright for him to proceed.

I wanted to disagree with him, but, seeing no point in doing so, I decided against it.

"Well, now that you're awake, I'd like to ask a few questions. Would that be okay?" 

I stared at the doctor in his white coat and big reading glass and let a minute pass before I gave him my nod.

"How are you feeling right now?" 

My gaze searched my family's faces, sensing that everything I ended up saying would be considered fatal for the doctor's conclusion. 

I wanted to admit that my body begged me to curl into a ball and cry. 

There was this ache inside my heart and deep within my soul that I couldn't explain. Yet, voicing that out loud would only aggravate their worries.

It wasn't the best choice.

"I'm alright," I whispered, my voice barely audible. For some reason, trying to speak also made me want to cry.

I had to clear my throat and try again.

"I'm feeling better," I mustered enough strength to put more volume into that one. The doctor's face looked like a light bulb suddenly lighting up.

"Excellent. We're making progress," he cheerily answered. "Are you up for another question?"

I moved my head slightly to nod, fighting the urge to shake it instead of nodding.

"Alright. Do you happen to know everyone around here?"

My brows furrowed, narrowing my gaze at the doctor before me. I haven't blabbered the phrases, "Where am I?" and "Who are you?" so I think it was rather unnecessary.

"Yes, and I know who I am, too," I responded. My mother came near me, squeezing my un-dextrose hand.

"Ah, very well. You do remember the events before you came here, then. Right?" 

Wrong.

I tore my gaze from the doctor, breaking eye contact and instead focused on my left hand, still held by my dear mother.

"No," I said ever so softly; I almost didn't hear it myself, yet my tiny voice had caused the whole room to fall into utter silence.

"I see," the doctor said after quite some time, catching my attention.

"Would you excuse me for a while? I would need a minute with your parents. Mr and Mrs Pears, may I speak with you outside?" 

Except for my mom's hand vanishing from mine, I didn't mind the three of them leaving the room.

My sister, Kelsea, settled carefully beside me as soon as the door shut close and gave me the longest, sweetest stare.

"Hi," my sister said to me upon settling in. 

I smiled back at her.

"Hey."

"How are you?" 

I bit my lower lip. I have no idea how to answer that because, honestly, aside from my memory loss, I felt like I had lost something more.

"Fine, I guess. I mean, I'm breathing, right?" I stared deeply into my sister's eyes. Her lips parted slightly into a thin smile as she stroked my hair.

"But you lost a little of your memory, huh?" I forced my lips to smile yet again before moving my head to nod.

"Aw, too bad. I was hoping it would all be erased so I could trick you." 

She meant that as a joke that would have been hilarious under any circumstance. But instead of laughing, I only gave her an acknowledgement because, at this point, the word erased scared me..