Chapter 59.

Five Months Later

Giving birth to twins was difficult as it always is, but not being able to bond with your own children was worse and attending therapy had to be much worse, but as long as I was getting the help I needed right?

Dr Ferg understood me all too well, or what it was I tried to say but wasn't able to get it through my lips. I'm currently going through a phase of hating myself eternally and internally, what kind of a person has a hard time being around their own children?

I always pre-pump my milk, every time K enters the room holding them I exit and stay in my bedroom until I eventually fall asleep on top of the covers and wake up underneath them with K's arms wrapped around, but these days he's always facing the other direction and I don't blame him.

Explaining all of this to Dr Ferg is relaxing to see somebody is listening to me and not trying to get me to see things their way, but help me figure things out.

"Why do you think Khalil hates you?" he asked me and I took a d