•
Great. She pissed him off again.
Now he looked like he'd rather go clubbing and get plastered with his city friends than spend half an hour with her.
Although in hindsight, she couldn't really blame him for wanting to turn tail and just leave her by herself. He didn't need to be here.
Perhaps Théo only asked to meet up with her again because he felt like she badly needed company. For her sake, and despite his ever-busy schedule of commitments, he made time tonight just to see her. Check up on her.
Still so caring. Thoughtful and sweet. She really didn't deserve him.
"We're just gonna stand here?" he murmured with knitted brows matching his frown. A thick jacket was carelessly placed over his shoulder. His shirt clung to his body while his hair, sneakers, and crinkled pants looked damp. It must have rained hard again.
He looked the same as last time. Short dark blond hair, weary eyes, stubble and...still good-looking, even though he seemed he'd had a bit of a day. Théo stepped closer. His steady gaze just pinned her on the floor.
Speechless. Almost disoriented. She felt it first—desire so painful her entire body just shut off everything else. She could only see him. Nothing else seemed to matter.
It nurtured an ache she'd been trying to numb with stressful difficulty. Veronica glanced away, holding in a sigh. Chest-deep in guilt. Shame. She couldn't get a word out.
His sleep-deprived eyes worsened it. Théo scanned her appearance from head to toe. He said nothing at her odd muteness and hastily turned his back to her. He rushed back to the front desk.
Five seconds after confirming their room assignment, he practically dragged her into the elevator. "What?" he sighed when the steel-gray doors slid close before them with a click. The question sounded more like a complaint. A flash of a scowl momentarily put curious lines on his tan face.
Most likely her total silence was beginning to irritate him. Not entirely her fault that her brain couldn't cope quick enough. She just didn't expect he'd show up—much less choose to stay the night in her hotel room. "I-I thought you weren't coming."
"Fucking traffic," he mumbled as his eyes darted around the small elevator. Apparent annoyance sharpened his expression before he pushed the button numbered '3'. "Why didn't you text back?"
Their stares locked. His calloused hand held onto her until his tight grip on her arm made her pull away.
"Sorry," Théo muttered and faced front. The look on her face must have been one of pain. Now he was caressing her arm that still hurt a bit.
The gentle strokes completely held her attention, and her tongue-tied self couldn't stop admiring his face, him being so close. His familiar cologne—his fresh, soapy scent—was starting to recall memories she'd been trying so hard to bury in the back of her mind.
His frown made her more uneasy as much as she didn't want to seem so. He leaned against the steel wall facing her, and his tired blue eyes never left her face after that.
The elevator trapped them in—though only for several seconds—all the while her brain racked to take in everything.
Cheap flippin' wine. A full glass didn't even relax her at all...and he continued to stare. Something was happening. At first she thought it was the useless wine finally kicking in. But it wasn't.
It was him. Just him.
•
The metal doors swung open before she could make sense of her scattered array of emotions. He took hasty steps after her, and then his hand caught her wrist. Veronica tried not to squirm.
Hand in hand, they rushed out to the narrow hallway, the lights making his almost crew-cut hair blonder.
Her hotel room didn't take them ten seconds to reach the door. Théo remained mum, and his grip on her was the one thing making her legs work. If he hadn't been tugging at her hand, she doubted she could get this far without tripping over herself.
"Where's the key?" Théo turned to her but avoided her eyes. Merely a step separated their faces. His breath felt so warm on her cheek, and he smelled of alcohol, unsurprisingly.
"In my pocket," she said with a sigh. Out of anxiety but mostly of relief. Nice to know her voice hadn't left her. Veronica glanced down her long-sleeved dress.
He dug into her dress' pocket before she could try to take the key card out. Her hand paused over his forearm. She bit on her lip; the pocket was deep. What's worse? Her phone rang again—she prayed it wasn't Kyle.
Théo frowned while she switched her phone to silent mode after declining a call from an unregistered number. Despite him scrambling, it took him seconds to get the stupid key card out of her pocket. The flat of his palm left a familiar warmth on her thigh.
The feel of his fingers touching her skin beneath the not-so-thick cloth was enough to stiffen her up. Her breathing turned shallow that instant. He must've felt it, as well—the straining tension between them every time he'd get too close. Otherwise he wouldn't be trying so hard to keep eye contact to a minimum.
"Relax, V. This'll be quick. This will turn out fine. Just be casual, friendly," her brain reiterated amid her anxiety attack.
There were two clicks after he slid the key card into the slot. In a blink, they were both in her hotel room. Théo threw his knapsack on a chair. Then he started taking his damp clothes off, his back to the dresser.
Self-consciousness and hesitation had her cowering to the corner. Veronica noted the dull air, her sweatier palms, and her tense intakes of breath. The awfully quiet half-lit room wasn't helping.
Shoot. She should've left the TV on. "D'you bring extra clothes?" she asked out of having nothing else to say. Veronica sat on the edge of the neat hotel bed, absently watching him change. "Might catch a cold. Take a warm bath," she suggested when the guy kept ignoring her.
"I'm gonna." Théo glanced up at her, his narrowed eyes almost saying: "What do you think I'm doing?" He got a toothbrush out of his bag and made his way to the bathroom.
"Way to go, Veronica. Can't even talk to him without makin' a complete ass of yourself," she muttered under her breath before slapping her forehead.
Only running water made enough noise to distract her from the erratic thoughts. Now she just felt like running away from him. Hide somewhere. Be somewhere. Anywhere. Just someplace else where she wouldn't have to see him. Or the sheer dismay in his face. The unmistakable disappointment.
As fast as self-hatred grew inside her, crippling nerves restrained her on the hotel bed. Throat feeling dry and sore, head throbbing slightly. He could not have picked a worse night.
As of five minutes ago, she was no longer alone. But now that he wasn't physically by her side, loneliness still crept up on her. Like a recurring moment of pointless nostalgia.
Damned sentimental heart. It hadn't even been a month yet. But she missed him so much. So freakin' much...
Just hearing his voice made her legs soften. Somebody help her.
This would be the longest, most painful night of her life.
•
• Unbearably awkward moments stretched into minutes while he got dressed. Théo hung his clothes and ignored her, his movements quite rushed. He wasn't talking to her―as expected. Stiff on the hotel bed, Veronica stayed hunched over and kept her mouth shut. She focused her distracted mind and gaze somewhere away from his face. His very handsome face. And beautiful eyes and mouth... Ugh! What the frick was going on with her? Such desperation. It was pathetic. It was driving her mad, annoyingly helpless that her chest ached at the mere sight of him. Théo staying here with her all night, alone with her in a small room...it felt too much to handle. She shouldn't even be in New York right now. She should be back home, working with her bandmates, finishing the recording. But, of course she drove out to the city. She needed to see him. One night would be enough. Just this once. She had to straighten things out with him―be it the last time he'd come see her. Was it another sign of depres
•
•⋮ 3 years earlier
✖ WARNING! ✖ Content below not intended for young readers. Read at your discretion. ✖• Present day •It shouldn't take her another hour to finally convince him that she had to leave now. He knew she had to work in the morning, record another song in the studio with Kyle and Dan, and he'd always respected the fact that she prioritized her job and her career more than ever.Being a musician was basically all she knew and did since graduating college. However, considering the current circumstances, he might try to stop her from leaving him again, only because he didn't want to be left alone, it seemed. Veronica sighed to herself.Her failed attempts to not cry her eyes out left her flat on the covers, lying face-down, marinating in utter shame and disgust with herself. Instead of giving him proper closure and kissing him goodbye for the last time, they ended up having sex again. Stupid. Pudding head. Hopelessly naïve. She could already hear her parents' voice in her head. They didn
• 3 years earlier •Good grief. Not today.No. No. No. This was not what she'd expected when she half-heartedly replied 'k..see u later' to his text. At least not this soon.When she'd agreed to meet up
• Arcueil, Paris • "Merde. Salaud. Pute." "Well, well, well... Someone partied a little too much last night." Théo froze on the couch and stopped mumbling complaints. The familiar voice instantly caught his full attention. Female. New York accent. Loud and rich with sarcasm. Jamie. He lifted his aching head. It felt like someone was jackhammering his skull from the inside. Damn that Polish vodka. Last night, Tomek had dared him to swig another shot of that acid-tasting drink. No—wait. Five more shots, actually. The thought alone made his temples throb harder. Théo flinched. Despite his boozed up brain, he could still remember how every drop of that lethal drink had scorched his throat. "Ran into Adri and Vincent at
• Present day •Kyle hurled his beer can into the trash. His skull felt like breaking open. Wincing in pain, he kicked the door to slam it shut, not caring if he'd wake the people in the next room. Another draining headache had been hammering his head since morning. His usual painkillers didn't work. They only numbed the pain for a few hours, in fact. He didn't feel like eating, either. Even after two pills, his stupid migraine only resumed a longer round two.Their band had been invited to play their new single at a radio guesting earlier. With their roadies, he drove back to the hotel near the recording studio before midnight with Dan and Via. Kyle eyed the door to her hotel room, their rooms just opposite each other.He didn't bother knocking and just jerked the door open. Clutching her phone, Veronica sat on the edge of the bed. Only the table lamp by the left side of the bed lit the whole room. "You good?" She waved at him, although she seemed too busy to make time for a
• 3 years earlier • The whole drive back to her apartment had been quiet and awkward, as expected. The entire time, Théo kept his eyes on the road, hadn't said a word about meeting Blake and his glittery new fiancée—a thing she was secretly thankful for. Théo hadn't opened up a conversation about what happened the entire day. He had mostly kept to himself. Pretty much what she needed right now. It seemed naturally easy for him to know and understand her thoughts and feelings. Amid this whole getting-over-the-cheating-ex phase, Théo had been the go-to guy. The best company. The perfect distraction. If he hadn't shown up, she wouldn't make it through the week. Put it simply, him being here had efficiently kept self-destructive thoughts at bay. Multiple ideas of self-harm included. It had been that bad. The dark living room helped hide the emotional turmoil brewing inside her. Veronica stuck her head in her hands, plainly exhausted, just like her tolerance for lonesomeness and