Bland,dull and boring. That's three words describe my life before. Pero ngayon, may rason na ako sa pag gising sa umaga.
I became even more educated. Sometimes I saw Sebe at school. Even I do not know why I am like this.
"What's bothering you Nat?" Tanong ni Kylie ang nagpabalik sa akin sa huwisyo ko.
"Fucking earth to fucking Natalia!!" Jen exclaimed and took her shot.
An earbreaking sounds filled my ears. Assorted colors from the disco light and people dancing and swaying anywhere on the dancefloor that seem to accompany the dancing and whatever obscenity the people are doing there.
"Nothing," Sabi ko at sumimsim sa blue boracay ko na inumin.Nandito kami sa Alcobar. Somwhere near sa aming School.
"Really? I think you're not.Tell me what's bothering you," she asked.
Should I tell her? Nothing's wrong right? I know these past few days I've been lack of thoughts.
I seem to be competing with the famous geniuses of our generation because my brain and body are beaten by my studies and reading books. Sabi nga ni Jen kulang nalang ako nang eye glass para maging nerd.
"Come on Nat! What friends are for?" Hikayat pa sakin ni Jen and she clunged her arms sa lalaking katabi niya.
Seriously? Kakakilala niya lang dito e. What a bitch friend of mine.I rolled my eyes with annoyance. And ofcourse hindi ako tanga para mag open up na may ibang kasama.
Less talk, less mistake. Ika nga.
"Some other time," Sabay sulyap ko sa katabi ni Jen na halos sa akin lang ang tingin. Such an ass. Si Jen ang katabi pero sa akin nakatingin huh? Really?
"It's about Sebe's right?" Napapitlag ako ng lumapit lalo sa akin si Kylie at bumulong. I can smell her sweet scent.
Damn, she's really an observant.
"How did you know?" I whispered back. Sapat lang para magkarinigan kami kahit maingay sa dancefloor.
Hindi ko deninay. Dahil mas lalo siyang magdododa pag hindi ko pa sinabi.
"I saw you.And I saw how he looks at you," She shrugged.
"But we dont know yet.Ano ba ang nararamdaman mo pag nandiyan siya?" She asked.
I pouted. Hindi ito ang tamang lugar at oras para usapan ang ganitong bahay. Ang Bar ay kasalungat na lugar para pag usapan ito.
"Lets talk about it some other time," I An excuse para hindi na dugtungan ni Kylie ang pag uusisa.
In our circle of friends Kylie is my closest. I know, I'm not the type to be sweet or you'll immediately find emotion. I'm used to this. I mean, myself. Like what they say I'm cold and stiffed.
I guess since my dad died, I have lost my cheerfulness and sweetness.
"Let's dance!" Hindi na ako nagprotesta nang tumayo narin si Kylie and she smiled at me.
"Come on!" Anyaya niya kaya napatayo narin ako dahil nauna na ang dalawa.
This is not our first time here. A few times as well. I used to drink only mild drinks. There is only a limit to my drinking.
I limit myself of course. I dont want to look like stupid because of too much intoxication.
I joined them on the dance floor. and for a while, I forgot being me. We're laughing and giggling at the same time.
"Woah! Nice one Natalia!" Sigaw ni Jen. Kaya napatawa ako.Damn. I enjoyed this one.
But all that was thrown away when I saw above a bulk of the man shouting in elegance.
His dark piercing eyes were all on me. Like I'm the only one dancing here on the dance floor. He was holding a cup of wine in his hand leaning against the railing on the second floor of the Bar.But my gaze shifted to the girl beside him.
Wearing a red sweetheart dress and have a beautiful face. Her arms clinging in Sebe firmed arms. My breathing suddenly tightened so I looked away. So, did he also go to the bar with another woman?
Ano pa ba ang aasahan sa isang Sebe? Rich and handsome fuckboy of our School? Ano nga ba ang aasahan ko? Nawala ang gana kong sumayaw kaya umexcuse ako kina Kylie na mag comfort room muna ako.Marami akong kakilala na nakasalubong at bumabati sa akin.
I will never forget Sebe with a woman. Why am I hurting? Do I have a right to feel this? The corner of my eye warmed up because of the tears.
"Fuck!" I cursed and looked up. It should not be like this. I dont deserve this kind of pain .
Pero sa pagtingala kong iyon ay ang pag angat ko ng tingin sa lalaking seryosong nakatingin sa akin.Nakatayo mismo sa harapan ko.
He's wearing a gray v neck t shirt and a black jeans. Bakat na bakat ang kisig ng katawan niya.His both hands inside his pocket. His wroth pair of eyes lingered on me.
What a perfect timing!Napatigil ako sa paglalakad at bahagyang bumagal iyon. He violently breathed out.
"Why are you here?" He asked nang lumebel na ang aming distansya.
Nangunot ang noo ko sa klaseng tanong niya.
"To enjoy,"I mocked and smirked a bit. "Bakit sayo ba ito?" Hindi ko alam kung bakit ko ito nadugtong. Fuck.
He immediately shifted his gaze on me like he's surprise by my sudden burst out.Kahit ako ay hindi ko alam.
"You're tipsy.Stop drinking," Mariin na sabi nito sa akin.
"Like you care?" E kanina nga e may babae kang kasama at ngayon eto yung pinagsasabi mo sa akin? Damn you.
Madiin at impit kung tinikom ang bibig ko na hindi ko madugtong iyon. Umiwas ako ng tingin.
"Uh mauna na ako.Sorry," Pambawi kong sinabi.Bago pa makaalis hinawakan na nito ang aking braso.
"Uuwi kana. Hahatid kita," I can feel the warmth from his body.
"May kasama ako. No need. Hindi mo ako obligasyon." His jaw clenched again from what I have said.
"Nakakahiya sa kasama mo," Dugtong ko. Wala na akong pake kung anuman ang isipin niya.
"Were not a thing.Kakilala ko lang siya," he explained. Pero hinawi ko ang kamay niya at tiningnan siya.
"Wala na ako doon Sebe. Wala naman akong pakealam kung sino man ang mga nakakasama mo," My voice suddenly croaked.
Nangilid ang luha ko. Bakit ang sakit? Ang sakit makitang may kasama siyang iba? Bakit?Sebe cursed as he saw my expressions.
"Fuck!I'm sorry. Why are you cryin?" Napasinghap ako sa tanong niya at agad agad na pinunasan ang aking pisngi.
Damn it!
"W-wala. Gusto ko lang umuwi."
But immediately he pulled me closer for a hug.Gusto kong magmura!
"I'm sorry," He said again. "Ayaw mo ba? Hindi na mauulit."Tumango ako bigla. Parang tanga akong tumango.
He snuzzled my hair and sniffed on it.
Sometimes his hug comforted me.
I feel different in the middle of his arm. My heart beats differently when we are so close. Why are we like this? Silence enveloped us when he drove me home.
I just texted Jen that I had already gone home. I didn't bother to look at Sebe even though I knew he was staring straight at me.
Until he stopped outside the gate of our house he also did not speak. I squeezed my hand .
"Thank you," I broke the silence and smiled. He bit his lips and nodded.
"Labas na ako," Sabi ko sabay turo sa pinto.
Pero sumenyas ang kamay niya sa akin.
"Come here," He commanded and tapped his lap.
What does he mean? Will I sit on his lap? What do you think Nat? Top one ka di'ba? Don't be stupid. I moved to sit on his lap. Is he really like this. My system shook when I sat there. His lips rose sideways .
"Are you mad?"
He suddenly asked, cupping my face. Hinilig niya ang noo sa aking noo. Langhap na langhap ko ang hininga niya na amoy whiskey. Nanindig ang balahibo ko sa aming posisyon.
Bakit ako magagalit? My right ba ako?
"No," Sagot ko.
"Talaga?"
I nodded. "Talaga," I confirmed.
He bit his lips and just one move he kissed my forehead. Napapikit ako ng mariin. Sobrang tumatambol ang puso ko. Gosh, Am I flirting?
Bumaba ang halik niya sa aking ilong and gave me a peck there.
Ilang sandali pa ay bumaba ang halik niya sa aking labi.. Damn..Sobrang lambot ng labi niya na tila masarap kagatin iyon. Ramdam ko ang galaw sa labi ko iyon.
"Open your mouth," He said between his kisses.
After a while his kiss dropped to my lips .. Damn..His lips were so soft that it seemed delicious to bite. I could feel the movement on my lips.
"Open your mouth," He said between his kisses.
I also seemed to be hypnotized by what he said and my lips spat out. i felt him smirked as he claimed my lips again.
I almost moaned when his little tongue entered my mouth.
His tongue explored my mouth. He tasted every side of it. Its tongue also teases my tongue .
I moaned sweetly.I can feel his hands wrapped on my body. Sobrang dikit na namin.Ayoko man na aminin pero gusto ko ang init na binibigay nito sa akin.
Hindi ko alam kung bakit napunta ako sa ganitong punto. Pero ayokong itulad ang sarili ko sa mga babaeng nalilink kay Sebe.
Kung ano man ang kahihinatnan nito,ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya . Wala na akong pakealam.He sucked my lowerlip.
"Fuck," He cursed. "Pasok kana. Habang kaya ko pa."
Napangiti ako habang nakatitig kami sa isa't isa. Ang isang halik na gusto niyang tapusin pero nasundan pa. Naorasan bago ako nakalabas ng kotse niya. Halos mamantal ang aking labi at leeg dahil sa kakakagat nito. Hindi ko malimot ang gabing ito.
Tagaktak ang pawis ko sa noo habang nakaupo sa bleachers. Kinuha ko ang towel ko sa bag na dala at nagpunas ng pawis."Nat,Maiwan ka muna namin dito Exempted ka naman sa exam e. Library lang kami," Paalam ni Kylie sa akin kasabay niya si Jen. "Okay. Kita nalang tayo mamaya sa room?" I asked.
"Hindi mo naman kailangan na sama-" Damon cut me off immediately."Just..eat," he pointed to his ordered food at a restaurant. I thought we would just eat outside the School. But I was surprised earlier when he put me in his car."Okay."Marahan kong sabi at sinimulan na ang kumain. Ang sa kanya ay halos wala nang matira doon.Ganyan ba siya ka bilis kumain?Uminom siya sa kanyang tubig bago nagsalita."Ilang beses ko na kayong nakikita ni Sebe. Nanliligaw?"Hindi siya nakatingin nang tinanung niya ako niyan. Nakatuon sa pagkain niya ang kanyang tingin.I raised my bro
So that's it.My day became natural again. School at bahay lang.Kung dadamdamin ko kung masaya ba ako. Yes,masaya ako. Minsan may kasama siya. Minsan lalaki, minsan babae,minsan mga pinsan niya. Pero kung babae parang naiinis ako? Parang kumikirot ang puso ko. But I ignored it.Like
Damon offer to drive me home. I don't want to but in his tone you can't refuse. I don't want to do anything. I don't like it, because I can see Sebe's face in the way he looks. Nakakahiya dahil alam niyang may damdamin ako para kay Sebe. Si Sebe kaya ay ganon din sa akin? Siguro hindi. Dahil kung meron hindi magpapa engaged iyon.Sobrang sakit ng puso ko na kahit paglakad ko ay parang lutang ako.He was about to open the door of Damon's car but we were surprised when someone came out of a car right in front of us. They
"Payong kaibigan lang Nat huh? Hindi naman kasi kami ang kumokontrol ng puso mo.Hindi namang naging kayo di’ba?" tumaas ang kilay ni Kylie. We are here now inside the gym. Resting just after we practiced volleyball. In front of us are basketball players from other courses "Hindi," Simpleng sagot ko.
"Lunch?'' Napataas ang kilay ko sa lalaking naglapag ng isang plastik nang Jollibee sa mesa.I study here in my favorite spot. I stayed away from Kylie and Jenn to study well. I have two hours to study.Yesterday was like a dream for me.Although it hurts me a bit that he is reserved for others.
Elizabeth Lee. In terms of posture and speech you know she's powerful. Even the look in her eyes seemed powerful as well.I wanted to push Sebe but I couldn't do it because I was so nervous. So I got up immediately. She looked at me and went back to Sebe. when Sebe stood up he lazily faced Eli. "What's brought you here?" Malamig na tanong niya at hinila ako palapit sa kanya. Nakita ko ang pagtalim ng tingin sa akin ni Eli .
Isang linggo narin mula iyong nangyari sa office niya.I dont know.Hindi na kami masyadong nagkikita. Nakonsensya ba siya dahil sa nangyari? Dahil nabitin? Really,ganon? It's bothering. I'm not a fool to not feel that. He is always in his office. I never saw him again. Kylie sighed and sat down beside me."Did you hear about it?" She asked.