Chapter 1

"Aria-" Jaxon grinned at me as we both stood outside the entrance to my apartment, "-do I get a coffee, or at least a goodnight kiss?"

If he thought that I was going to let him inside my apartment just because he gave me a sickly smile and used his sweet tone, then he had another thing coming. Jaxon would be going home alone tonight, mostly because I wasn't the type of girl who slept with a man of the first date. They had to show me that they were worth my time and that I wasn't making a mistake by letting them into my life, because that was a lesson which I had learned when I, finally, walked away from Mikee Barnes three years ago.

"You know, coffee is just the worst at this time of night, you'll never be able to sleep. And, as for a kiss? We both know what that will lead to." Tonight had been fun and I wouldn't mind seeing Jaxon again, but I couldn't have been happier that the evening was finally over, and my apartment had never appeared more inviting than it did right now.

"What about tea? Hot Chocolate? Water?" He spoke quickly and, from the way he was desperately trying to grab my keys from my hand, I knew that he only wanted one thing off me and that I wouldn't be seeing him again. Apparently, he was just the same as every other guy I had attempt to date, and only wanted the sex without the commitment.

"Look, Jax, you're a nice guy and everything, but I don't want to have sex with you," I spoke bluntly. "I'm not looking for something like that right now. But, thanks for a great evening and, who knows, you might even see me again." I finished, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek as I forced my key into the lock and walked into the house, attempting to close the door when a shout of pain prevented me from doing so.

The idiot had put his foot in the door to stop me from closing it. It was further proof that there were some men who just couldn't take no as an answer, because they always had to get what they wanted from a woman.

"Please, Aria?" He begged me.

"Look, I have a daughter inside who is waiting for her mother, and an ex who doesn't take too kindly to me seeing other guys. So, if you don't want to end up as a mute who has to be fed through a tube for the rest of his life, then I suggest you leave now and don't bother contacting me again." I stated, not even sure where that partial lie had come from, but at least it made him leave me alone.

I don't think I had seen a man run faster than Jaxon did down the corridor and out of the building. And I don't know what scared him off more, the apparent threat from my fake ex, or the fact that I genuinely did have a daughter who was waiting for her mother to come home.

Either way, it was a shame, because he did seem like a decent guy until he tried to force his way into my apartment and sweettalk his way into my bed; the very same bed which was covered in my daughter's toys and hadn't been made since I last changed the bedding two weeks ago.

I had barely taken my coat off when my best friend, or as I like to call her, my babysitter, came running out of the living room with a smug grin on her face; almost telling of the fact she knew this night was going to be a failure before it had even happened. She had even tried to warn me off going but, being the stubborn fool that I am, I insisted that he was different and that tonight would end on a positive note.

Guess who looks a fool now?

"What?" Was all I said, because I wasn't in the mood to listen to her gloating about how she told me so, or even have her tell me what an idiot I was for not listening to her.

"Good evening to you too," she replied.

"Sorry. Bad night."

"Guessing Jaxon wasn't all you thought he was cracked up to be?" In my head, I had a witty remark planned, and then I would throw her out of my apartment so that I could fall asleep and pretend that tonight never even happened. But, knowing what Eve was like when I lost my temper with her, I decided against it and used my better judgement instead.

"Not someone I would ever want the fortune of crossing again. He had the looks and the attitude, but he wasn't  more than a desperate twat who would sleep with just about anything right now," I chuckled lightly.

"If you do insist on meeting men from the Internet, then something like that is bound to happen, but he does remind me of someone," Eve laughed back and I felt a flash of anger wash over me, knowing that she was referring to my own situation with Mikee, but I managed to subdue it before I said something which I would only regret.

Eve Menroe was, not only my most trusted friend, but she was also my best friend, something which I had never said about anyone else in the same sentence. We had known each other since we were five when she moved into the house next door to us, and now here we both were, coming up to the age of twenty-five.

I was a single mother, not that I have ever regretted having Ellaine and choosing this life for myself, and I was working in a dead-end job as a waitress; despite having the University degree which meant I could work practically anywhere I wanted. But there were not many jobs who offered hours which worked around a fussy three-year-old, so I was lucky that Samson Young gave me the freedom to work around my daughter, and never complained about it once.

But that didn't stop me from wishing that I had Eve's life, because she had all the things I wished I had.

She was married to her high-school sweetheart, Alexander Matthews, and they were expecting their second child together. She had her dream job, headteacher of the local Secondary School, and Jacob owned his own decorating business. They had an amazing house, right on the beachfront, and you got some of the most amazing views when the sun was setting in the evening-she had the life which I could only dream of having.

"Why do I always go for the wrong type, Eve?" I replied solemnly. "Why is it so damn hard to find a man who will, not only love me, but will also accept Ellaine and love her too?"

"It's not that hard, Aria. You're just looking in all the wrong places." Eve rolled her eyes, just as she did every single time I asked her that question and she gave me her response. "Of course, you could always tell-"

"You always say that, Eve. But you've been with the same person since you were sixteen, and you're already on your second child." I cut her off before she could mention anything about telling Mikee that he was Ellaine's father, because I had already decided it was for the best if he never found out the truth, especially when he was so adamant that he could never have kids; something about an accident when he was younger which resulted in him being infertile.

I had, naturally, believed him and only found out that he was liar when my period was three weeks late and I was suffering from the worst case of morning sickness. I could barely leave my bed without throwing up my entire stomach lining, and then I was terrified to eat anything, because Ellaine always made sure that came back up at some point during the day too-it was also how my mother discovered that I was pregnant, but that's a story I would rather forget, given that she did disown me for six months of the pregnancy.

"I'm sure you'll find the right person soon enough, Aria. It's all about patience," Eve chuckled and I was just about to reply when my eyes were drawn to the back of one of the envelopes which were sitting in my pile of post from this morning.

There was the name which I had spent the last three years trying, and failing, to forget. I wanted to pretend that he was nothing more than a bad dream which continued to haunt me each time I closed my eyes. Though, both of those things were next to impossible when his daughter had his eyes, and I was reminded of the man every time I looked at our daughter.

Mikee Barnes.

I had made it clear to him, on the night I walked out of that hotel room, that I never wanted to see him again.

The night that I made it clear I couldn't be second best anymore and, if he really loved me and he wanted me, then he would tell his wife that it was over right in front of me. He would tell her that he was no longer in love with her and that he was seeing another woman.

Of course, he couldn't do that though and, as much as I thought that I needed him at the time, I couldn't have him.

I couldn't stand the thought of being second best.

But, something else happened that night too. After I had sex with him for the last time and walked away, taking his baby with me, something more happened.

He made it impossible for me to be with any other man because, when I was with another man, he was the only one I was thinking of. He was the one I was imagining. And the thing which makes it worse?

I still wanted him.

I craved him.

He was my drug and I couldn't see any way of getting over my addiction, not until I'd had my fill of him once again. I still needed him and it was impossible for me to get him out of my head, and it's part of the reason I could never be intimate with another man, or even entertain the idea of becoming a family with someone who wasn't Ellaine's father.

What the hell could he want with me now, though?

That's the only thought which was running around my head as I picked the envelope up and twisted it around my fingers, thinking of all the things it could possibly be.

Another admission of love? A note to tell me that he had finally left his wife? Did he know about Ellaine?

But another thought quickly struck me. It might have been from his wife.

Hell, it might even have been from that arrogant fool he called his brother.

"I'll just go and get Ellaine back to sleep, shall I?" Eve's voice reminded me that she was still in my apartment and that I had been ignoring her whilst I was trapped in my own world of worry and thought.

"Yeah. Sure. Thanks." I knew that Eve tutted at me and muttered something under her breath, but I didn't hear what she said, and that was probably for the best as I slid my finger under the flip and pulled the piece of paper out of the envelope.

And, when I saw what it was for, I tried not to be disappointed and I tried to pretend that it didn't bother me, but it was no use. It felt like my heart had been ripped out all over again and there was nothing I could do to ever get it back, this time it was gone forever, and I knew there was nothing which could be done.

Why?

Because Mikee was renewing his wedding vows.