The Beginning After The End

A groan escaped my lips as another wave of pain and nausea hit me. I felt like crying, screaming away all the pain.

I was about to open my eyes when sudden fragments of foreign memories rushed into my mind, swamping my brain like a tidal wave.

Whose memories are these?! Wait, am I even alive? More foreign thoughts began to fill my head.

An abandoned castle. A beautiful woman with long platinum blonde hair and emerald green eyes holding a tiny baby who was swaddled in warm blankets, while looking out the window all day long, missing her husband who never visited her even once.

Wait? What kind of fucked up thoughts are these?!

Another wave of pain washed over me and I felt myself lose consciousness once again.

***

When I opened my eyes again, I expected myself to be in a hospital room. I thought I was going to die after getting hit by that blasted truck.

Turns out... I didn't die. I've heard that wicked people live longer. Considering my personality, I guessed that statement was true after all.

I was quite pissed off that I had to delay my vacation due to this sudden incident. But there's no use crying over spilled milk, and I guess those children were safe.

I slowly opened my eyes, but instead of the usual white walls of a hospital room, I was greeted by a beautiful lace canopy hanging above my head. My eyes fell on the wooden posts that kept the bed together and I realized I was lying on a huge and soft bed, covered by a warm lavender quilt.

I was dumbfounded. It was the first time I had ever seen everything so western-inclined and old fashioned except in a movie. 

"My lady, you're awake!" Someone suddenly shrieked next to me.

I turned to the voice and I saw a middle aged woman wearing a strange frilly maid uniform sitting next to me while holding my hand with teary eyes. I furrowed my brow in confusion.

Judging from her features, she was obviously not korean. She had greyish light brown hair and warm brown eyes, which looked curved.

I could've sworn that I'd never seen this woman before, but why was everything so familiar to me? This was so strange, everything was so strange. 

Why was I not in the hospital? Am I being kidnapped?

I've heard some crazy fans can do something so extreme towards their idol such as stalking, kidnapping, and even attempting murder. But, such a case never happened to me before because my old company was very strict about their artists safety and eomma always took care of it, especially since I was the top star in the company. But now...

My heart pounded uncontrollably at the possibility of being kidnapped. I wanted to escape. But my head hurt too much to do anything.

"My lady, please don't push yourself. You still have a fever." 

The woman's expression showed that she genuinely cared about me which made this situation even more bizarre.

Then a sudden intense emotions and memories came rushing back to me and I sat up with a start, frightened.

"E-Elle?" I unconsciously mumbled the name.

"Yes, my lady?" That woman answered.

Wait. How did I even know this woman's name? This is madness.

She took a cup of water from the bedside table and handed it to me.

"You have been sleeping for two days due to high fever. I was so scared, my lady."

Fever?

It didn’t make sense. I was pretty sure that I was in a car accident. So, how could I didn't even spot any external injury? Was it just my imagination?

No, the pain I felt when that damn truck bulldozed over my car felt too real to only call it a mere imagination. 

I glanced at the strange woman with a cautious look. I didn’t know what to make of this absurd situation, so I just gulped down the water. I didn't realize how thirsty I was until then.

The woman smiled at me like a satisfied mother when seeing her child eat well, which made me feel even more uncomfortable.

After she was gone, I took in my surroundings and looked down at my hands. Then a frightening realization dawned upon me. They weren't my own.

It looked similar in terms of shape and skin color, but strangely it felt so foreign. I didn’t know where the hell I got this strong hunch that it wasn’t my own.

What is going on? Is this a nightmare? 

I tested out by moving my fingers and then pinched myself to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming. It hurt. This wasn’t a dream.

At that moment, my hands flew to my hair and my eyes widened when it finally caught my attention that my hair was platinum blonde instead of black. 

A frightening thought that I was kidnapped suddenly came back into my mind. 

Gosh, what kind of pervert dye their victim's hair when they're unconscious?

I was on the verge of a mental breakdown. 

Seriously, what's going on? Did I really get kidnapped? Or was this some sort of game? Hidden camera, perhaps? I twisted my head towards the corner of the room, trying to find cameras. But there was none in sight.

It was then, when I had unconsciously begun trembling in the bed, full of anxiety. My eyes darted around the room once again. Still no cameras. As I tried to figure out what was going on, I spotted a body sized mirror near the dresser.

I need to check it.

I felt dizzy as soon as I stood up, but I also needed to make sure for myself. I had a really bad feeling.

I staggered to my feet, trying to drag myself in front of the mirror.

The moment I faced myself in the mirror, my breath got caught in my throat and I almost screamed in horror.

Instead of Cho Sarang's trademark long and thick black hair with doe hazel eyes, what greeted me in the mirror was a ridiculously beautiful woman wearing a white vintage nightgown that I often see in a western historical movies. The woman had long platinum blonde hair that fluttered down to her waist, long lashes shading a pair of exquisite and vibrant purple eyes that looked like precious jewels. She had skin as white as snow, lips as red as roses, naturally blushed smooth cheeks even without putting on anything with perfect, delicate and elegant features. If I could find a suitable term to describe this woman, it would be something like an angel or a celestial being.

Wait? Purple eyes? How could someone have purple eyes? Is this even real?

I tried to touch my eye to check if it was a contact lens or not, but poked myself instead.

"Ouch, that hurts," I grumbled.

"It's real," I mumbled to myself.

But her looks were definitely out of this world.

This woman was beautiful rather than pretty, unlike Cho Sarang, she looked docile rather than arrogant. 

It was like I was looking at the Goddess who was overflowing with decadent beauty. It was so unreal. But then, I remembered that this situation itself was already unreal and I almost laughed at myself.

I noted that this woman was quite petite and had a similar frame to mine, but she seemed younger than me. I moved my hand to my face and touched her cheeks. I once again shocked myself at how soft it was. This woman had really got it all, it was so unfair.

This was kinda ridiculous coming from me - who spent most of my life in the entertainment industry. I encountered many beautiful women, and I was one myself.

But this face would put Cho Sarang to shame. Gosh, I'd look like a squid next to her. I'm ashamed!

It was a hard realization for me as I'd lived for twenty five years praised for my beauty.

But seriously, I had never seen anyone more beautiful than this woman. Not in Korea nor anywhere else. Even those Hollywood actresses could not compare.

I only stopped admiring my face when a realization about this bizarre situation hit me once again and my hands flew to my face in terror and disbelief. 

No matter which way I looked at it and how much I wanted to deny it, it became apparent that this wasn’t a dream, nor reality, but a situation within a novel.

I’m in a fucking w******l!

Heavy anxiety and confusion struck me at the realization. I could’ve never imagined this situation at all. I clearly remembered being hit by a truck, and then...

Damn, is the truck a dimensional portal or something? Why do people isekai into shitty novels after getting hit by a truck?

I took a deep breath to avoid myself from hyperventilating.

After pondering for a while, I came to the conclusion that this is what it meant to be 'transmigrated'. It was very common in novels these days.  

While reading about it, I had imagined something like that happening to me. But that was it, an imagination, nothing more. It was just wishful thinking when life became tough. I had only wished for it when I was young and naive and innocent. I never believed it could actually come true. 

There might be a time when I used to imagine having a strange creature as my imaginary friend, or a magical fairy as my partner, or being chosen to save the world or jumping into a virtual reality to be some sort of a hero. But I am 25 years old. I am too old to wish for things like that.

Goddamnit! I might have said that I love fairy tales, but that doesn't mean I want to be sucked into one!

I took another deep breath to calm myself. I needed to think and focus to organize my thoughts. If this body's memories were right, then I was currently in the body of Belladonna Reigna Astaseul, one of the characters from the novel I read last night. 

Shit, it was truly her. Platinum blonde hair, purple eyes, and God-tier beauty. That Belladonna!

The main villainess, the crazy witch who died a miserable death after attempting a coup d'etat to seize the throne and avenge her mother. Yes, in this world magic existed.

Bella's mother, Meredith Jane Aurelia was a Princess from a neighboring country before she married Emperor Frederick and became his Empress. It was a political marriage, but Meredith fell in love with the Emperor at first sight.

Even though the emperor didn't feel the same way, they remained courteous to each other. They were a couple with a good relationship.

But suddenly the Emperor took in Sophia, a poor baron's daughter who worked as a maid in the imperial palace, as his concubine. Sophia claimed to be pregnant with the Emperor's child, and at that time, Bella wasn't even conceived yet.

It seemed like Meredith, whose position was threatened, couldn't just sit around and do nothing. But it was clear that fate wasn't on her side. 

Interestingly enough, the emperor and empress already had a couple's relationship and Bella was the fruit of the couple.

Unfortunately the emperor wasn't interested in his daughter at all, especially after all the evil deeds that Meredith did to his beloved Sophia and their child. Meanwhile, Meredith spent the whole day in tears, missing her husband, and in the end, died miserably when Bella was only six years old.

Honestly, when I read that sort of background story, I wouldn't have thought of villainess, but rather some sort of unfortunate female lead… but that’s not what’s important right now!

Growing up without parental love, Bella ended up twisted and committed herself to all sorts of shady actions. She wanted to take revenge on her father who abandoned her and her mother.

But of course she was defeated by the main character and the heroine.

The crown prince, Alistair Calder Astaseul was her half brother and the hero of the story.

In the end, Belladonna was ruined and sentenced to death for her crime by the age of twenty.

"Your evil deeds will come to an end now, Belladonna Reigna Astaseul." Those were the last words the hero said to Belladonna.

What a cheesy line to say.

It was uncreative. Really uncreative. It was a typical line of a hero from a children's storybook. I cringed so much when the hero reiterated lines that only characters from a moldy, third-rate hero novel would say.

I probably should have stopped reading trashy novels by now.

I sighed tiredly.

Gosh, I still can't believe I became that crazy woman!

I pondered for a moment. If those memories served me right, my new body was currently seventeen years old. That meant I only had three years left before the tragedy.

Am I going to die?! Again?

I suppressed a scream. Why couldn't I just be reborn as a baby? How does this reincarnation even work anyway? Why did I become a character in a novel?

And a villainess?! I know I wasn't a saint in my past life, but a villainess, really! Do I seem that evil?

I scowled at myself. Was that her role now? To die again? I had just died this morning in an accident for God's sake. And now I'm destined to die again. Dead!

No... I don't want to die. Who's that crazy to want to die again after experiencing it once?

I shook my head frantically. No, I will not allow this! I will live my life to the fullest this time!

But first, I need to figure out the current situation I was in as ‘Belladonna’ and make a plan to ensure my survival.