The Opportunity Fly Away

The small house he had left three months ago was deserted. Praveen sat pensively in one of the corner. This the house where he was born and raised. All the joys and sorrows he experienced here. In this place also his father died years ago due to acute tuberculosis. At that time he was only six years old, still too young to know death. He wasn't as sad as he was now, because there was still hismother. He was not very close to his father because the man was taciturn. Rarely did he utter a word. He leaved in the morning for work and came home late at night when Praveen was already sleepy and going to bed. His father worked as a coal miner.

It was the mother who later became the breadwinner. She became a vegetable seller and receive sewing order from neighbors. If there were enough sewing orders, she worked late at night even though the wages she received not much, only enough to buy two liters of rice and cooking oil. But she never complained.

His mother's face continued to haunt. Like ectoplasm incarnated in all point of view in the house as if she was still there. Her voice still ringing in his ears as if calling his name.

He regretted himself. How selfish he had been all this time although he never begged but he never helped his mother work. The woman never ordered him either. From her mouth was only words in the form of advice so that Praveen was diligent in studying, reducing his madness for watching movies at the cinema.

Yes, he hangs out at the cinema more than studying. For him watching movies was more exciting and made him forgetting the time. Before the cinema doors opened he was already there waiting.

It was easy for him to get in even though there was no ticket. He knew the cinema staff well and often won their hearts. He was willing to be ordered to even just massage them.

For Praveen, watching movies was like entering another world. The story was always exciting and the players were handsome and beautiful. Even though he knew it was all a ruse, he got lost in it. He watches all kinds of films, no matter the action or drama, even for good films he can watch it twice more.

Over time he became interested in taking part in filmmaking. He knew Mumbai was the center of Indian cinema. From that city every year can produce hundreds or even thousands of films.  It was far more than America.

Secretly he worked in a pottery factory to raise money to prepare for Mumbai without known by his mother. He saved all his income. All the information he was looking for how to get into the world of cinema industry.

Yes, through auditions and castings. The vacancies were widely spread in the mass media. That's why he made up his mind to go to Mumbai. And he became more confident because he was blessed with a handsome face, almost everyone said he was suitable to be a movie star. In addition, his posture was also supportive. Many people do not believe that he was the son of a poor widow who sells vegetables.

Three months in Mumbai From audition to audition he followed. Maybe dozens of times, and the result was the same, he didn't pass. But he did not give up, kept on trying with undiminished enthusiasm. He was sure that one day he would be able to make it.

But with the death of his mother yesterday, made his passion go away. He seemed to realize that the world of cinema was not his world. Maybe what her mother said was true. His dreams were too lofty and absurd.

With the death of his mother he did not think about the results of his audition two days ago. It din't matter if it passed or not. He felt guilty for abandoning his mother for the sake of his dream. He felt he had a lot of mistakes that could not be fixed anymore. It's too late.

What Auntie Neha said might be true. The only way he could do it was to make up for it with good behavior and self-awareness. Realizing that the world of cinema was not his world. He must accept reality not live in fantasy.

He quickly got up. He immediately went to his room. Slowly he opened the bedroom door. There was a squeaking sound as the bedroom door opened. Apparently the door hinges were  rusty because they rarely opened.

He looked at the atmosphere in the narrow and simple room. Nothing had changed since he left, just a little dusty. Posters of his idols stars were still hanging on the walls. There was Shahrukh Khan, the old man Amitabh Bachchan, Aksay Kumar, and Hrithik Roshan.

Praveen smiled to whomever he was looking at the posters. He remembered that there was yet another very special poster he had put behind the door. He deliberately put it behind the door so that the door was closed from the inside, only he himself could see it. And he really liked to imagine wild things when seeing the poster. The wild imagination of a normal boy when alone thinking about an idol girl. Priyanka Chopra's big poster.

He really liked Priyanka Chopra. There was a strange vibration every time he looked at the poster. But it's all over now. Without thinking, his hands quickly tore through the posters. The walls of his room turned plain and only left patches. The posters that he tore he collected in the corner of the room to be thrown in the trash later.

That's when a woman's voice called out.

"Praveen, are you in?" asked Auntie Neha.

" Yes, I am here in the room," Praveen replied. There was the sound of approaching footsteps.

"Hey, what are you doing?" her aunt asked surprisedly to see Praveen with a torn poster in his hand.

"I'm cleaning up."

"Cleaning up by tearing up posters?'

Praveen didn't respond. He just kept collecting the scraps of the picture paper.

"What do you need Auntie?" Praveen asked changing the subject.

"You have eaten? If not, come to my house. I cooked more today."

"Later, I'm not hungry yet."

"Or should I just bring it here?"

"Auntie, you don't have to worry. I'll be there later."

The woman was silent for a moment. Her face suddenly became serious.

"I need to talk to you."

"What are you talking about?" asked Praveen. He looked back at the woman again. Suddenly his heart was pounding. He looked like he was looking at his own mother, but the face of the woman in front of him was rounder and younger. Of course they look alike, they were siblings.

"You're not going back to Mumbai right away, are you?" asked Auntie Neha.

"So what?"

"We're going to have a funeral ceremony in honor of your late mother."

Praveen was stunned. This was what he worriying about. He wanted to speak frankly but he was too ashamed for didn't have any money. There was only a few thousand rupees left in his wallet.

"Is it okay if we don't do it, Auntie?"

"Are you crazy? That would be disrespecting your mother." Her eyebrows rose.

"That's not what I mean. I have no money. I only have 3500 rupees in my savings, and that's definitely not enough," Praveen said frankly.

"You don't have to worry about money. I actually bring good news."

It's Praveen's turned to raise eyebrows. The woman immediately pulled up the only chair in Praveen's room and sat down.

"I'm sorry! When your mother fell in the bathroom on that day, I checked your mother's closet looking for money for your mother's medical expenses. Incidentally, I didn't have any money at that time. There were 30 thousand rupees there. I thought it was your mother's money. At the time of death, mourners also contributed donantion. There were 15 thousand rupees collected. I thought that's more than enough. Here is the money," The woman took out the bundle of money she had kept in the folds of her sari. She handed the money to Praveen.

Praveen was silent for a moment, and pushed back Aunt Neha's hand.

"Just keept it. It's for you,  Auntie," he answered lightly.

Auntie Neha's eyes sparkled. A happy expression appeared on her face.

"Is it right? This your mother's money?"

"You need it more than me."

"Okay, okay. Thank you then. We will have the event on the tenth day. You should be here, help me get everything ready."

"Yes, Auntie. No problem. Later, after the event I will return to Mumbai."

"You have no intention of staying here?" asked Auntie Neha again.

"I don't belong to here"

"Then, who will occupy this house? Will it just be left empty?"

"What's the problem?"

"Instead of being empty, it's better to be rented."

"If anyone is interested, just do it. The money can be used to help you. Someday when I come home and this house is already inhabited, let me stay at your house."

"That is idea that greatly benefits me! Of course I completely agree, my handsome nephew!" said Auntie Neha caressing Praveen's head. Praveen smiled. The first smile his aunt saw after yesterday was wailing in front of his mother's cremation procession.

"What do you want to do in Mumbai then? Don't tell me you still want to be a movie star. It was an impossible dream. You have no experience, nor do you have connections. You'd better find a definite job. If you want, I will give you the address of my best friend in Dharavi. He's a merchant there. You can work with him."

"Yeah, I'll think about it later. I don't want to be a movie star anymore. I get rid of the dream away."

The woman glanced at her nephew's face. She believed Praveen really said so.

"Okay, I'll go then. You just keep on cleaning up. When you are hungry, come to my house to eat, "

Praveen nodded. The single woman at the age of forty soon rolled by.

***

There in Mumbai where Praveen tried to audition two days ago, was already full of people. There were happy faces and there were disappointed faces from the people who saw the announcement that was posted. Those who were happy at that time also joined the next process, while those who were disappointed went home with unsteady steps. One thing Praveen didn't know was that his name was listed there, even at the top of the names that passed the audition.

"Have you contacted the participant named Praveen?" asked the man who during the audition yesterday in a red shirt to the woman at the front desk. He was the Casting Director.

"I've even called him three times, but he doesn't seem to be answered."

"I'm surprised he has no intention of taking part in this project."

"I don't know. I remember he asked me when the results were announced. I told him to come here now."

"What a stupid! Squandering a golden opportunity just like this. You can calling the name on the list of potential reserves. Send him here within two hours from now," he said.

"Okay sir. I'll do it right away." The coquettish girl immediately looked at the list of potential backup candidates and picked up the phone.

The Casting Director immediately passed.

Oh, Praveen. Bad luck for you. Once the golden opportunity came, it flew away and disappeared!