CALUM
I didn’t think Pete would call me but he did to let me know they were in Cathy’s house. He wanted me to stay with her while he sorted out some things. That might have been the best thing he ever did because she was a mess when I came in. I could hear her voice from outside. It hurt then, even now, with her in my arms, it still hurts.Cathy whines in her sleep. Her hand blindly reaches for me as if to ensure I’m still here. There’s no respite for her in her sleep, she’s still scared. I plant another kiss on her temple. There’s nothing wrong with her. She’s perfect. I stare at her until my eyes can’t handle it any longer. I should check on Mace but I’m afraid she will wake up to see the bed empty and panic.
A knock echoes from behind the door. Pete pushes the door open and his head pokes in. “Come in,” I tell him. He walks in holding Mace. There’s a crib beside the bed. I try t
7 am comes faster than I expected. I’ve hardly fed Mace when I hear the knocks from downstairs. We glance at each other, and I get out of bed sluggishly. I need to eat or I may slump. But I have no appetite. Since Mace can crawl, I let him down on the floor once we are downstairs and skip to the door. Calum is all smiles when I open up. “Hey.”“Hey,” I reply. I step back for him to enter. “He crawls?” he asks, his voice laced with excitement. I nod, but he’s already gone to his son. Squatting before Mace, he says, “Hey.” A spell of dizziness hits me as I stagger to them. Calum lifts Mace off the floor, coming to stand beside me. “Hey, are you okay?” “Yeah. I’m fine. Did you drive here?” He looks suspicious. “Yes. Have you eaten?” I don’t think I’ve had anything to eat in two days. If I have, I don’t remember. Whatever the case, I don’t have much of an appetite.“Yeah,” I reply. “You should sit down,” he murmurs. I don’t want to argue in front of Mace so I follow him to the couc
CALUMThe sound of the door closing follows me as I jog down the front stairs of Cathy’s house. There are not enough adjectives to describe how infuriating that woman is.She is not the only victim in all of these. I am too and instead of teaming up, she wants to be on the opposite side. Very well then, I can do that. But God knows a court mess is the last thing I want. I spent all those months without her, and now I’m here, I can’t catch a break.What’s her excuse? If she was so pissed, why didn’t she show up? Because she was scared and heartbroken. Because of that stupid email. Of course, it was that email. She already believed I would leave her and seeing that email solidified the fear. Still, it’s no excuse. Her trust in me and love for her baby should have superseded the fear.I take a few more steps to the fence and stop. Spending the night with her isn’t a bad idea. In fact, I was hoping she
CALUMCathy must have seen those pictures. If the email didn’t solidify her hurt, the picture did. I rub a finger over my brow and redirect my attention to the box on the floor. A different kind of fear wraps around me as I count up to fifteen bubble gums.The pieces of the puzzle fit into place, and a groan tunnels out of my lips. I broke her heart, but she was still hoping until Yani.These were her good luck charms. The first time I had to meet Scott, Cathy gave me a gum because she believed it was a good luck charm. Her mum would give her one before she sang. And now, she kept one each time we performed. There had to be more than twenty. We didn’t have up to twenty shows within that period. Or, was it for Sam, Lucas, and I? She was wishing us luck?My heart clenches. The sound of the water running shuts off and I hurriedly shove the items back to the shelf. My eyes dart to the bathroom, waiting for it to open. It do
CALUMI wake up to an ear-curdling scream and jump out of bed, eyes on the lookout for the danger. Cathy stands at the door, eyes wide open in horror. I reach her in five strides and grab her shoulders. She looks okay. I’m almost out the door to check on our son when she yanks me back into the room.“Is Mace okay?” I whisper.“What?” she sputters out. Her glossy lips purse as she tries to understand my question. “Yes, he’s fine. Why won’t he?”“I don’t know,” I reply, a bit disoriented. I place my hands on my hips, more confused than she is.First, she scared the shit out of me. Second, she dragged me out of a beautiful dream, an alternate reality where we both have a happy ending. Three, she looks so pretty. Four, she smells nice. Five, I love her.The blue eyes that narrow at me show she doesn’t appreciate my ogling. I back out of her space and drop down to t
It’s not Calum’s fault. But I’m still upset. I don’t know if I’m allowed to be upset after hearing his side of the story, but it’s what I feel. Like the man said, I have this pent up resentment and anger to expel, and it won’t just disappear into thin air because he told me he lost his memory. That fact is only enough to ease the anger momentarily but it always comes back. I’m hurt and don’t forgive him. I can’t. Not so soon, anyway.I fold the last batch of Amelia’s things into the box on her bed. The action draws tears to my eyes, but I guess it’s a good thing I still know how to cry. Exiting the room, I shut the door with my foot. The sound catches Calum’s attention. It doesn’t matter what I say, he’s still here. He went to his hotel for a change of clothes. And now, he is back. I may have been a bit harsh with my words. Scratch that, I was very harsh.Dad thinks it a goo
A kiss to my cheek, another to my lip, and my eyes fly open. Calum stares down at me, his emotions on display. I manage a smile. My thoughts centre on him, my heart does a flip, and a colony of ants erupts in my belly.“We will need to go to the pharmacist,” I say, ducking his lips before he claims mine. “Oh.” Worry dips into his eyes, and he slides his fingers into my hair. “Are you okay?” I nod. My cheeks heat up. “You came inside me,” I whisper. “I don’t want another Macey.” Not anytime soon.Calum laughs. “Okay.” I try to sneak out of the bed but he hugs me from behind. “We didn’t get a chance to talk yet, superstar.” “Talk about what?” Throwing my head back, I look out the window. Calum’s arm settles on my belly. “What are we talking about?” “Us?” Calum says. He sits straighter, folding his legs under him. He must have changed into a pair of shorts while I slept. I pull the cover with me to hide my nakedness. My back hits the headboard and shivers race down my spine. Calum ad
CALUMSomeone is tapping me. I blink sleepily until my blurred vision clears. Cathy grins. I like that she’s smiling. Without thinking, I reach for her cheeks but she ducks in time.“Did you just get here?” she asks.“Get here? I never left, Cathy.” Except to clear my head downstairs. My reply brings another smile to her lips. “Are you done?” “Yeah.” Jumping to my feet, I offer her my hand. “Ready to go?” She laces our fingers. “Yeah.” “You did good,” I remind her.“You don’t know that for sure,” she says. But her steps are more relaxed as we begin the descent down the stairs. I catch her stares a few times and bump my hip into hers. “I love you,” I whisper.Cathy hears me but doesn’t reply. What if she wasn’t lying about moving on, that she’s not in love with me anymore, and I’m a means to an end. A venting machine. Sex was an outlet for her in the past. I don’t mind being that outlet but I want everything. The sex. The cuddles. The kisses. The love. The light bulb moments.“Ar
Ebun thinks I should sort out my emotions, heal right before getting into any romantic entanglement. She didn’t mention Calum, she doesn’t know him but she knows I have a baby daddy who wants to be involved in my life. It was a suggestion, an opinion, not a fact. That’s one of her favourite lines. I think she says that so she can’t get in trouble with her clients. I like her until she starts with the deep, thought-provoking questions.I place a gown on the bed and step back to picture myself in it. I have another session with her later in the day. Calum volunteered to drive me. He lives here now. Jason stops by more often for Calum to practise with his guitar. That vision of the two men bonding over music is one Amelia would have loved to see. But it’s okay. She’s in her world, she is watching all of us. And it’s not my fault. It’s not her fault she’s not here. It’s just life. A tear rolls down the corner of my eyes and I wipe it off. Ebun thinks crying is good. I think sex is better