"Luna-" Lacys familiar voice fills the empty room.
"Oh my god!" She gasps.
I stare at the mirror in utter disgust, anger brewing inside of me as I poke at my flesh. The bruises are long gone, but the weight I'd lost in the past week has taken a huge toll on my body. My skin is paler than usual, far more bones poking through than ever before. Dark circles rim my eyes, thoroughly making me a monstrous sight.
Fact is, I wanted to blame Hardin. He's the reason I'm here, he's the reason I don't sleep, the reason I can't eat. At the same time I didn't have the energy, blaming him is tiring, and it's not like I'm not to blame too.
I refused the food, I stayed awake at night, I didn't converse with the pack or even leave the room. I've been clinging onto my old life, the person I was only last month due to a promise I made to my brother. In the end, that promise is going to kill me, holding on is hurting me more.
I want to keep my promise, I want to be the person my brother expects me to be, but seeing myself in the mirror for the first time in two weeks ... I'm utterly horrified. This is the price for refusing to accept my future.
Who must I pay for that? Why do I have to accept Hardin and his pack?
You don't. My mind whispers, while the old me so very weakly attempts to convince me otherwise. I've listened to my thoughts, I've heard every excuse and argument.
"I'll get the doctor-"
"No." I croak, my throat weak from being silent so long. Wrapping a towel around my bare body, I shield my nudity from Lacy, and myself.
No one is going to save you, Kalli, only you can change your outcome. I tell myself silently.
"If Alpha finds out and I didn't tell him-"
"I can't stand nude before another man, Lacy ... I've been humiliated enough." My voice is a low whisper as I finally turn away from my horrid reflection.
How is she even looking at me right now without wanting to vomit? I couldn't help but wonder, fully aware of my hagged appearance.
"Pack doctors aren't going to judge you, Luna." Lacy says softly, closing the door as she invites herself into the room fully.
My tearful eyes meet the females, and I almost want to break down and cry my heart out to her. Then again I don't see the point, she will always be on her Alphas side, naturally she'll defend his every action. Thinking such things only turns my mood sour, knowing I am utterly alone here, powerless against him and his pack.
"I have to get dressed, do you mind?" I glance at the door behind her,silently hinting for her to leave.
"Of course not, Luna." Lacy gives a small smile, quickly vanishing back out the way she came.
Heading into the closet packed with clothes my size, I pick out an oversized tan hoodie and skinny jeans. Tucking my feet into a pair of warm ankle boots, I leave my hair to hang freely. Even though my clothes are larger than usual on me, I head out of the bedroom with a newfound mind set.
Today I fancy omelette, which is a huge upgrade from my current eating habits. I hadn't realised just how long it has been since I last ate, the hunger had faded after a while so it didn't bother me. But seeing myself, the vulnerability, the pain I'm putting myself through just to keep a promise, it's made a change.
A small step, but it's progress, right?
"Good morning, Luna." The pack greet as I pass them randomly in the hallways, I give the same smile and wave to them all, my mind fully focused on omelettes right now.
Finding a kitchen that isn't being used by the chefs, I route through the pantry until I find all the ingredients I want. Given that I've cooked this multiple times at home for my parents, I have the easy recipe memorised.
For the filling I whip up some bacon, tomatoes, bell pepper and cheese, the smell of my omelette cooking immediately awakes my hunger. This time I felt it, the clenching pain within my stomach, the starvation literally hurting.
Unlike humans, our bodies deal with things differently. I know first hand what it's like to starve, this isn't my first time, but I also know how quickly my body is able to recover. It won't take longer than a month for my body to be fully healthy again, although I admit it takes my mentality a while to heal.
Sliding the omelette onto a plate, I sit the pan in the sink and quickly chow down the hot delicious food. I couldn't help but close my eyes as I bask in the flavour, even when I lived with my parents I don't remember ever eating freshly cooked food, I was allowed the leftovers.
My stomach aches as I eat, even more so when I'm done. Another wolf would eat triple before feeling satisfied, but my stomach is stretched just from one. Still, progress.
With a small smile on my face, I wash the pots I'd used and put them away, feeling strangely calm.
"We have maids for that."
My smile vanished faster than lightning. Placing the last dry fork in the drawer with the rest, I fold the tea towel and turn to face the man that literally seems to haunt me.
"I know." Is all I say, not bothering to argue because it's pointless, and I'm tired.
Hardin glances me over with a slight frown on his tan features, grey eyes almost silver, swirling with silent storms. I'd never get used to his eyes, the way they change with every thought he has, every glance.
"Have you eaten today?" Are the words that he asks, concern laced deep within his rough voice, like he's finally seeing the weight loss.
"I made omelette." I say quietly, glancing elsewhere so I didn't have to keep looking at him.
"The chefs will prepare anything you ask for." He frowns at me.
I give a small shrug. "Anything I want, I can do for myself." I say, not particularly liking the idea of someone waiting on me hand and foot.
"It's their job, Katalayha, they're not forced to cook." Hardin states, as if knowing why I don't wish for them to cook for me.
Hardin still hasn't been in my memories, but I know he's figured out that I basically became an adult the moment I could talk. Cooking, cleaning, I was forced to run a household my entire life, if I didn't my parents would inflict pain on me.
"Do you need something?" I question, staring at my fingernails as if they're suddenly of huge importance.
"The pack mentioned they'd seen you, I thought I'd check in." Hardin states in a calm voice, too calm.
Despite not knowing him, I do know that he doesn't just 'check in' randomly, he knows I'm fine. Yet the second I leave the bedroom, he comes looking for me.
My mark tingles with electricity, a familiar sign of his desire, the darkening stare sending goosebumps through me.
"Don't ... please, I don't want to." I whisper, my eyes widening slightly as I silently plead with him to not do this.
Hardin's familiar stone cold expression softens only for a moment, before he reaches out and grips my throat. His rough fingers force me to look up and meet his hungry eyes.
"You don't?" He mutters to me, his rough voice husky with want.
Gasping, I quickly push against his hand that presses against my centre through my jeans, surprise filling me.
"Hardin!" I hiss, panicking as I glance between him, and the doorway.What if someone comes in? Does he not care about the pack seeing us?
"I want to be right here, inside you, making you mine." Hardin growls softly, his finger pressing harder against the fabric covering my candy land.
Before my mind registers what I'm doing, my hand wraps around his wrist, shoving him away with all my strength. Hardin squeezes my throat, just enough to make me gasp a little, his face nearing mine as his eyes grow darker.I know what he wants, and if I don't act then he'll take it, again. No amount of refusal with words has worked so far, he acts like he hasn't even heard me. But pushing him away, that gets to him."I strongly suggest you don't repeat that." Hardin growls sinisterly, eyes ablaze, bright red.Every nerve in my body screams at me to submit, but at the same time I feel powerful being able to deny him. Even for a short moment, being able to finally tell him no, and mean it, gives me huge satisfaction."Then I suggest you don't touch what isn't yours." I say, my voice ringing with clarity.Damn Kali, when'd you get so brave?My entire body freezes over the second I see Hardin's face contort with anger, the utter fury that burns within his blood red eyes. Until now I'd no
"Harder!"My growl resonates over the sound of his voice, frustration burning through me. No matter how much I push, Hardin doesn't move a millimetre."I'm not strong enough." I snap, exhaling heavily as I step away from his huge form.My arms ache from trying to move him, I'd used all the strength I could muster and it didn't faze him. I'm supposed to be stronger than this, I'm supposed to be powerful, and I doubt I could take the average wolf."You're trying too hard." Hardin states."Clearly not hard enough." I respond with sarcasm dripping from my tone.How can I be trying too hard, when I haven't even been able to move him? Trying less would get me know where. Hardin has been training his entire life like every other Alpha in the world, all except me. Perhaps my parents were right, a female shouldn't be first born."You're trying to control your strength, to focus it, and it doesn't work that way." Hardin snaps at me, annoyed that I'm blanking him.My wrist is suddenly grabbed, a
A entire week of hell, and the day hasfinally arrived. After seven days of maxing my limits and exhausting myself with what felt like pointless torment, it's finally time to face the music.Even though Hardin gave me a brief rundown of how the ceremony will go, I'm still nervous. For three days I'll be put to the rest with a series of different challenges and tasks, more so because I'm now Hardins mate."Take it off, wolves don't need to cover up." Beck mutters to me as we exit the car.Brushing his hand away, I bury my hands into my pockets. Hardin and his beta join us, leading me into the large stone mansion. I didn't pay much attention to the building, or the decor, only the amount of wolves that whisper and stare as I pass them.They smell my Alpha blood, they're naturally threatened by it. I assume that's why Hardin stays close to me, placing me between himself, Zed flanking my left and Beck just behind us. I have to admit, I don't feel so on edge with all three close by.The wol
"Are you ready to meet your maker?" Zed whispers to me.Inhaling a long shaky breath, I roll out my shoulders in attempt to shake off the tension. I barely slept last night, Hardin has spent hours debating with the Elders to switch my opponent. Judging by Zeds words, I know Hardin failed to convince them."As ready as I'll ever be." I say softly."He's going to taunt you, as long as you stay in control, you win." Zed assures me.Nodding, I take a deep breath. Control, the one thing I do have over myself. Knowing that comforts me, even if I know the beating that he's going to give me may just put me out for the count."Where's Hardin?" I ask, my nerves haywire.I needed him with me, I needed his comfort, I needed to know that he's still going to stand at my side no matter what happens. But most importantly, I needed my mate for emotional support, just having him close does wonders."He'll be here." Zed promises, squeezing my shoulder as if to calm down my fear.Nodding, I inhale slowl
The command has my mother cringing away, incapable of withstanding the sheer force of my words. I couldn't help but smile, my teeth covered in blood."Y-yes." She gasps for breath, clawing at my hands. I saw my own reflection in her terrified eyes, the usual arrogance long gone as I choke her, my fingers ease their grip a little."Yes what?" I whisper, my voice like ice as I stare my mother right in her eyes, no longer frightened by her glare.Eyes tearful and cheeks scarlet, from strangulation and fright, my mother gasps her words."... Yes A-Alpha."I almost felt guilty, for humiliating her in such a public place. I shouldn't, she's never shown me any love or kindness, she's just a woman that should have protected me, and instead chose to be my greatest fear. A small part of me still refuses to harm her, she did raise me even if I'll never forgive her for the way she did it.Releasing my mother, I watch as she scrambles away to my father. I could smell her fear, and it didn't please
"Ow!" I yelp out, trying not to flinch as the woman peels the wax from my tender flesh.Never in my life have I felt this kind of pain, having hair literally ripped from your body in chunks. Truth be told I've never much bothered with shaving or waxing, I didn't have time, and I didn't have a mate so I suppose it didn't matter.The woman is here on Beck's doing, he saw my legs a few weeks back and made a comment to shave them. I ignored him, although I now wish I'd listened because he's ordered this poor woman to blitz my entire body.And I mean, everywhere. Places that I wasn't even aware people waxed.It feels like hours passed of endless pain, before the lady finally declares me finished. I immediately exhale in pure relief, more glad that I have a few hours to heal before the ball starts."Thank you." I say to be polite, when in reality I'm not thankful, I want to punch her for causing me such horrific pain.The woman leaves my room, and I slump back into the comfortable chair, th
Turning my head slightly, I glance into his light grey storming eyes. His face so close that I could blink and I'm sure my eyelashes will stroke his cheek. Being so close to him like this does strange things to me, body, heart and soul."Perhaps-" My gentle tone cut off by another, immediately having my head turn in her direction. It's disrespectful and quite disturbing that she's interrupting us."This is the upgrade?" A woman's voice asks curiously, yet sharp, like ice.Upgrade?I glance over the female with curiosity, wondering who she is to not be punished for how she approached Hardin. Like everyone else, she's dressed flawlessly beautiful in a silk red gown that hugs her perfect slim hourglass figure. Her skin glows, smooth like porcelain, unblemished by any marks. Eyes bright, sparkling blue orbs framed with thick lashes, small nose, full lips, and thick brown hair sectioned perfectly into waves.I'll admit, she's beautiful, stunning actually. Who is she?"Lorelei." Is the shor
The faint sound of music echoes, soothing my aching ears as I stare out across the vast forest. From this height, everything seems so peaceful, so quiet out there in the trees. The gentle calling to give up control, to just be free, is tempting.Relaxing against the stone balcony, I slowly inhale the scent of the forest. The strong earthy stench is nice, almost comforting. Being sheltered from my true nature all these years has deprived me of many privileges, and even now I can't seem to escape old habits."I thought I might find you up here." A vaguely familiar voice says.Immediately stiffening, I turn and I flash the Elder a smile. "Just needed a little fresh air-"He raises his palm, cutting me off."Bearing witness to the years of suffering, I understand completely why you prefer your own company." The Elder says with a small smile.I couldn't help but scoff, irritated that he thinks he knows me, he doesn't. He invaded my mind, saw things that I have kept to myself all my life."