Once again, the moon goddess had to play a trick on me. Life raised my hopes, only to send it to the ground to fall and shatter into pieces. If only I hadn't hoped for anything.
It so happened that on that fateful day, when I turned sixteen alongside my sister and many of our peers, we all eagerly waited for our wolves. We were filled with anticipation of the lycanthropy ceremony. Everyone was in high hopes, including me.
In the Red Moon pack, we shifted at the age of sixteen and mostly found our mates by the time we were eighteen. So you can imagine how joyous I was at the upcoming ceremony.
But cruel as it may seem, on that night of the ceremony, I watched my sister and all our other peers shift to their wolves under the blood red full moon at midnight.
I waited for my wolf… I waited in shame.
My wolf never came. It was a gut-wrenching experience for me, I walked back home with my head bowed and cried all the way home. What have I done to be ill-fated?
As expected, Donna was at the door to welcome my sister and to shower me with her insults again. Luckily for her, the goddess gave her the right to keep insulting me.
"I always knew you were a curse! This just confirms it. If you were not an evil child, you would have shifted like the rest of your peers. This is your punishment for killing your father." She spat at me, before locking me in the basement.
I didn't care anymore… I felt abandoned, hurt and filled with bitterness but I had no choice. I have nowhere to go. I spent three days in the darkness without food or water, before she released me.
Six months later, I shifted into my wolf. I guessed I should be happy now, right? It should have been a thing of joy for me, but it only led to more shame and disgrace.That was because as usual bad luck always clinged to me. I got my wolf but it wasn't a wolf, but more like a baby goat! My wolf was very small and my comparison is the perfect description for it.
It was weak and frail, with a pale brown colour, and it never spoke to me. I guess we are on the same page. We were cursed according to my mother.
Yet again, I know I would become an object of ridicule amongst the entire pack. Everyone and anyone who wanted to, bullied me at their will. And that was because it was now certain that my wolf was so small that if I ever picked a fight, I would be chewed up without a sweat.
"Weak and pathetic! Why are you still alive?" My mother spat at me one fateful day.
I was so bittered that I responded to her." Are you really my mother? Why do you hate me so much? Why!"
"Did you just scream at me, you worthless weregoat! You are a goat! That's why you have a goat instead of a wolf…"
"Mother!"
"Don't you dare call me mother after you killed your father! You are a curse and a disgrace! I am sending you to the palace first thing in the morning!"
She started screaming at me, I was so ashamed that I ran away into the thick forest opposite our house.
On getting there, I started crying loudly. I knew I won't be heard by anybody so I cried to my heart's content. The tears that I had been holding in for a long time started falling heavily.
"Are you okay, young lady?" I heard a voice from behind. His scent was so unique and refreshing. It felt like drinking water from a spring.
"I… I am fine. I just got something in my eyes." I quickly lied lowering my head. I could sense he was a stranger because his scent was not like anyone living in my pack.
"Got something in your eyes and you are bawling at the top of your lungs?"
"I am fine. It stings… that's why I was bawling my eyes out so that the tears might have a healing effect." I lied again, through my teeth. I never knew I could lie like this though.
I heard a soft chuckle from him and my mind skipped a beat. That chuckling sound.. It was almost like that night I got lost. I wanted to raise my head, but I dare not.
"Raise your head let me see you." The voice commanded.
"I can't," I replied weakly.
"You can't?" He asked me back.
Before I could say anything, he was already in front of me. He raised my chin up gently and looked at my face. I wanted to close my eyes, but somehow I couldn't.
"Isn't this the face you are hiding? Are you afraid because you are different?" He asked.
I was surprised he wasn't cursing or feeling angered by my appearance.
Then I heard him say." You are different because you are unique. The Moon goddess would surely give you someone that would treasure you. Keep hoping."
Why does this sound familiar? It was too dark that night so I couldn't see the person's face clearly. Could he be the same boy?
As I was lost in my thoughts, I didn't know when he left. Where did he go? I couldn't even ask his name!
Though I was disappointed, I stuck to his word and hoped on the moon goddess sending me the one to cherish me.
**************
With every passing day, I held on to hope - just as he had told me. I made it a habit to hold on to good things that could come, it was what kept me alive each day.
Even though I might be down on most times but trust me, I was a very optimistic person. I believed in fate and the Moon goddess even though she had failed me several times.
So I held onto yet another hope. I chose to believe in the word of that stranger. I believed everything will be fine once again. There was a glimmer of hope.
My mate.
I believed that I would find my mate once I was eighteen.
He would love me and he would be my friend. My mate would protect me and stand up for me when I was being picked on, he would shield me like male mates do, and he would never let anyone hurt me.
I believed my mate would take me away from my mother and sister and he would keep me safe with him, nurture and cherish me and I would never have to worry about anything else again.
That was my hope. The hope that kept me going till I would finally meet him. I believe he would love me regardless of everything.
I should have learnt that it was futile to hope. I should have learnt my lesson from the incident of my wolf, but still I held onto that tiny bit of hope. Futile to hope in the so-called Moon goddess that I trusted even after all the ill fate.The moon goddess had always been so cruel to me, I was sure she hated me as well, I should have understood this and not expected anything from her.
But I didn't, I allowed myself to believe that I deserved a happy ending, for all that I had gone through.
I was wrong. Finding my mate was not my happy ending but the start of my real anguish. It was the start of the real pain and that was when I would know that the pains of all these years were nothing.
It was a new dawn of never ending suffering.
Koko's POVAfter that night, I stayed clear of Gad. The hatred and hidden threat I felt in his aura was enough to shake my supposed courage. My hope shattered once again. But then, I could understand why he didn't want me. I mean, how can a guy like him want a girl like me? I was afterall an ugly, weak and cursed girl who was obviously hated by her family. And supposedly caused the death of her father. Gad was the hottest and most eligible bachelor in all of the Red Moon pack. He was loved by every female wolf in and out of the Pack. Even the neighbouring packs with eligible female wolves drooled over him. The most beautiful of them, all lined up at his feet. Even the female alphas fight to get his attention. That's how hot he was. Even my sister who still remained the golden girl of the pack, was dying to be with him. There was no way he could agree to settle for a female like me; the laughing stock of the pack and the known cursed girl. I went about my duties quietly and calmly, wit
Koko's POVI felt a burning sensation on my cheek. The impact got me falling to the ground as I spat out blood. How could I be so dumb to think that I could go against my sister? I had never won over her. I have been beaten, gagged and trampled on just to satisfy her. What made me think this would be different? How on earth do I think that Gad would accept my being mate with him? He did warn me, but I thought he was just bidding his time. Wishful thinking, right? That had always been me. "Fucking cunt, didn't you hear what she said?" Gad roared at me. He didn't even flinch when he saw me on the floor, neither did he felt remorseful for hitting my. I felt abandoned and… hurt, but for fear of another slap, I lowered my eyes and bit my lips from quivering. I had no choice but to obey, if that would stop everything. How wrong I was. I was totally and freaking wrong. Who said being obedient would take me out of trouble? I have trouble as my second, no, first name. It follows me everywhere.
Koko's POVAfter that day's incident, I tended to avoid everyone. I went about my business quietly like a mouse whose tail was cut off. I worked like a horse, wallowing in my sorrows and woes. I had no one to console me. It was just me and my wolf. Though she doesn't speak to me, I feel her presence from time to time. But just as she decided to ignore me, I did the same to her. It wasn't that I was blaming her or something, but I was too broken to console anyone or listen to any consolation. I just wanted to be left alone. The servants still pushed me out to sleep on the cold balcony, but I didn't mind as long as I could put something on my stomach. I Ignored their curses and insults. I swallowed their beatings whenever they deem fit to hit me. I never fought back. I refuse to fight back. Perhaps I was tired of fighting back when all I would receive would be worse. Every day I watched as the love blossoms between my sister and my mate, no, my mate that rejected me. Though I felt a p
Koko's POVI was still filled with surprise when the maid got closer to me, panting. What could be the urgency? What happened? It's strange for them to talk to me and even more strange to be called by my name."What do you want and why am I needed? I am through with my chores already." I asked looking confused. What have I done wrong again?These people always frame me for every single thing and watch with glee how I was always punished. So I wondered what trick they had hatched up this time."Koko." She called out again. I heard it clearly this time around. I really wasn't dreaming.It was the first time I had heard someone in the palace call me by my name. Come to think of it, I didn't think they were trying to punish me. I thought it must be something else, as they called my name. That means it must be something they needed my help with. But what could it be?"You are needed at the palace infirmary…now!" She was panting hard, and she looked very worried. It scared me. The palace In
Koko's POVI watched as my mother and everyone around unanimously agreed for my heart to be taken in order to save Hanola who according to them was the future Luna. I fight back the tears threatening to fall.I was suddenly weak on my knees and almost fell down. I had to hold myself back because I knew no one would care if I fell or not. They were all expecting a positive answer from me.Do I even have a choice? If I don't agree, I would live a miserable life worse than death. And if I agree I was still going to die. The only difference would be that I would at least save my sister.That would be doing a good deed, right? I couldn't save my father, but I now have the chance to save my sister. That was probably the reason why the moon goddess still let me live after killing my father. I took a deep breath before facing my mother."I agree to save Hanola. I will give her… (I hesitated a bit, asking myself if I was making the right decision.) My heart." I said in surrender and I bit hard
2 Years Ago. Niyol's POV "I am so sorry, your grace," Chester my beta spoke softly with his hand resting on my shoulder. I could feel his deep sorrow. Why was he sorrowful? I stood dumbstruck by the sight before me. Though my heart was beating faster than lightning, I still couldn't believe it. It can't be her. It just wasn't her, right? I shook my head vigorously to take away the image. I stared at my beta, I refused to believe anything. Why was he apologizing to me? I thought. "Why are you apologizing? We are in a dream. Soon we are going to be gathered eating her favorite cooked beef stew. You don't need to be sad or sorry." I told him. Or was I trying to convince myself instead? I don't need to convince myself because this wasn't real in the first place. This was one hell of a dream, yeah. And I am sure I was going to wake up from that moment. I knew I was dreaming because soon my Luna's arms would be around me in the morning. Psychologists would call my action "d
Alpha NiyolThat moment that I kissed her in her dazed state this morning felt normal like every other morning. But that would now be one of my most cherished moments ever. It kept replaying all over my mind.There wasn't a single life in her. The only woman I loved my entire life was gone right before my eyes and I couldn't protect her. Feeling frustrated, I growled loudly in anger.Though I held back the tears, the pain was eating me up. My growl was so heartbreaking that I know the pack members within the palace must have felt it.She was supposed to be my mate and I was to be her shield. I was supposed to be her umbrella in times of rain. Her rock and her shield. And yet… yet, I had missed the signs. We slept together almost every night making love and feeling our hearts. Growing fonder each day yet, I still missed all the signs.How could I be so careless?It's been five years since we got married. Although we had been trying to bear a child, just for the sake of the throne, I n
NIYOL'S POV Staring at my mother with eyes as dark as the night, I tried very hard to control my emotions from going berserk. "What…did you just say?" I asked with fire in my heart. "It's true. Why would she…" My mother started, but I cut her off with a murderous glare. "How could you say that about your daughter in-law? I thought you once took her as your daughter?" "I did, but that was before all this started." "Mother… it wasn't not her fault. Do you know if the fault came from me?" "I know you will come to her defense. But she is dead already, Niyol." "Even if she is dead, it doesn't make you disrespect her!" "It's the bitter truth, Niyol. Do you know how much your father and I had to endure from the people around?" "And do you know how much she had to endure these five years?" "What did she have to endure?" My mother scoffed. "She had to endure being called names by her fellow women and mothers like you. She cried every single day and at night I had to he