Chapter 4 (MATE)

SOLO

This is where I wanna start my story. The year was 1966 but let me reminisce about what happened last year… 1965.

Last year was the year of sweeping changes, mostly in the United States. In January, President Johnson announced the plan for his 'Great Society' programs. The programs want to vastly expand the American welfare state and the role of the Federal government in virtually all aspects of American society. 

A notable development for the year 1965 specifically in this regard was the signing of the 1965 Civil Rights Act. I had no idea about that, I was just an omega and our pack wasn’t into any political things. As long as we live with a harmonious relationship in the fucking* hierarchy we had, we should be thankful. I should fucking* be thankful.

While major changes were occurring on the domestic side for America, all was not quiet on the foreign policy front either. Even us. 

Foreign policy as Alpha Czar thought was such a scrap out of the whims of the leaders who wanted to use diplomacy as a way of corrupting the nation's mind. 

It was March of 1965 when the president ordered 3,500 U.S. Marines to Vietnam. These were the first official combat troops deployed to Vietnam during American involvement in that conflict. As we heard the news, Alpha Czar mockingly laughed as he wanted to say how right he was when he said his opinion about foreign policy. 

But 1965 was not only about politics and government issues. In the entertainment circle, pop culture emerged. I saw the happiness in my mother’s eyes when she watched the movie titled The Sound of Music, starring Julie Andrews. 

Being omega, we were deprived of anything that could be called luxury in life, and watching movies was not allowed to us as it was considered a privileged for the mates of the alpha, beta, delta, and gamma only. We are only slaves. But Luna Rosalie was so nice to Mother, she let my mother watch the movie with her.

I didn’t fucking* care for the movies then, but I love music as I love listening to the sounds of The Beatles. They are not Americans but the worldwide sensation they created made me dream that someday I could be like them. I will be known too, not only as being the son of an omega but will be known and respected by weak humans. I knew I had no chance in our pack. Once born an omega, always an omega, forever an omega. 

I remember when The Beatles performed the first stadium concert in music history, playing at Shea Stadium in New York City. It was December of 1965 and I tried to watch, but I was not even that far from our small village when I was caught by Delta Rick. I received lashes because of that and that started my hate for our pack and questioning the hierarchical order. Fuck* the hierarchy!

Changes in America happened in 1965 and changes in my perception happened as well. That was the time when I started to hate myself for being an omega. It was still clear in my memory that we are not affected by the political movements in the country for we are living far from humans but we are affected by the tradition of the fucking order of the pack. 

Yes. Without Alpha Czar knowing, the weak omega they thought, me, started to doubt their leadership. Alpha Czar might be good but his beta, delta, and gamma were nothing for me. Without them knowing, the pack was just creating an enemy. My hatred for the unfairness of life started my desire to be out of the pack. If only not for Mother, I will escape the slavery that was just been tagged as an obligation.

"Solo," I heard Mother calling my name and that made me stop reflecting on whatever happened last year. 

"I'm here," I answered and went out of my room to go to her. I found her in our small living area and she was folding our clean clothes. 

"Luna Rosalie wanted me to stay with her. She might deliver her pup any day of this week." Mother did not look at me and continued what she was doing.

"Okay," I said while nodding. Another week without my mother means a week I could talk and hang out with my only friend in the village, my best friend Clemencia.

"Solo, you are already eighteen. I just want to remind you that you might find your mate soon and I hope she is one of the beautiful she-wolves of your age here in our pack. I hope your mate is not from other packs."

A small smile played on my lips. I have someone in mind and I know she hasn't met her mate either. I hope the moon goddess would pair me with that she-wolf.

"I saw you always with Clemencia, neglecting the other she-wolves. I am worried that you might not find your mate because your friendship with Clemencia misleads you that you like her."

"There is no misleading emotion, Mother. Clemencia is the only one who cares for me. No one from the she-wolves you were telling me wants to be mated by me." I bitterly smirked. I sat beside her and helped her fold our clothes.  

Truth was, I understand them. Who wants to be mated by someone who'd been an omega for a lifetime? An omega that even shifting cannot do. I think there was a problem with me but I can't raise my concerns with Mother, she might be hurt if I sound not content being an omega and not content being me.

At eighteen, I still cannot shift. My wolf form was still hiding from me. I was stronger than most of my age but I was the only one who couldn't shift and how I hated the two different eye colors of mine. My left eye is blue and my right eye is golden brown. It was one of the reasons that I was bullied. They loved to call me a freak. 

When I received a hundred lashes from Delta Rick when they caught me trying to leave our pack to go to New York. No one cares aside from Mother that cried and begged for me and Clemencia who helped me attend to my wounds caused by those lashes.

After Delta Rick has satisfyingly done punishing me, Mother asked me to stop looking for something I can't have. I don't know what she means then. I just want to watch The Beatles but it looks like I made a big mistake. Whatever we wanted was considered a crime because we are the lowest in rank.  

"You will find your mate soon." Mother touched my face and pinched my cheek as if I was still small. I felt the warmth of her hand. I smiled as my childhood memories came back to me. My mother, despite us being poor, never let me feel alone. 

"Having a mate or none won't matter," I said with a smile. "You raised me all alone without regretting getting old by only having me."

She smiled bitterly. "Your father is my mate, Solo."

I went still, dumbfounded. My brows furrowed for the wonderment of what I heard from Mother. "But I thought-" 

"Believe what I am saying and let it be a secret for the two of us." Mother cut my words. She then started packing some of her things into her old backpack. "Your father is special and you inherit his abilities, but I hope you won't show it to anyone. Alpha Czar and Luna Rosalie are good leaders and I don't want them to doubt you. Be humble, Solo. Always humble." 

I didn't say anything after that. I just nodded. Mother said my father was her mate. In my mind, I am so happy knowing that. 

When Mother left me after our talk and I was left alone like my name, I am still thinking about what she had said. Since I was a pup, I know that we should follow Alpha Czar. Mother always said that if it wasn’t for Alpha Czar then we both might die while I was still on her belly. 

My Mother was pregnant with me when she joined the pack of Alpha Czar, I had no idea who my father was. My mother was raped by my father, that was the information I was always told all of my life. That was what I kept on hearing from the pack too. Now something true about my existence made me smile and fuel my hope. 

I was ecstatic when I left our house as I plan to go to the woods to look for some rabbits for my dinner. As I was walking into the woods, I saw Delta Rick and Gamma Mark talking. They are talking about the human women they had met at the pub last night, and how those women made them satisfied. 

What an unfair life! Fuck* them both! They were punishing us for a small mistake we committed but they are the ones who were not following Alpha Czar's most forbidden rule. No human interaction.

Alpha Czar always reminds us that he doesn’t like any interaction with humans and that he forbids us to be friends with the latter. He said that humans only look weak but that makes them misleading and doubtful. I wonder what would Alpha Czar do with these two if he learns they are the ones breaking the rules on human interaction.

I know how strong Alpha Czar was and how he always prioritized the safety of our pack. The Stone River pack. His beloved pack. If by chance he heard these two then I know he will discipline them, Alpha Czar was fair and just. 

“Omega!” someone was shouting and I knew I was the one that someone was calling. He always does that, calling me by my lowest-level rank, not by my name. Aside from the delta and gamma of the pack, the beta calling me now is whom I mostly hate.

I sighed and walked to come near the pack's beta. "Yes, Beta Amir…" I answered with my head down when I was in front of him already. He won't let me look at his eyes, he won't allow me for I was just a slave. 

“Clean my shoes, omega!” Beta Amir threw his shoes to my face. 

I didn't say a word and followed his order. I walked and went home to start cleaning the shoes of the boastful beta of our pack. Instead, I look for my meal for dinner, I was interrupted by that moron beta who only knows is to boast about his position in the stupid hierarchy. If he wasn't Alpha Czar's brother then I doubt if he became the beta.

I calmed myself. Being calm as I need to remain calm was the only thing I always put in my mind. I cleaned Beta Amir's shoes. I was brushing it to make the leather shine after I removed all the dirt when I heard screams from outside.

“Don’t come outside!” I heard Beta Amir loudly say and I just followed. I hid while looking outside in the peephole I could use to watch what was happening. I saw the werewolves from another pack. Being omega, we were not supposed to meddle in fights. We have no right to engage in any pack's war.

I always asked my mother then if there would be a chance for an omega like us to lead a pack and become alpha but she always reminded me that I should focus on how to serve our alpha and his luna. Mother always tells me that being an omega wasn't bad, at least we are not the priority in wars. I believed her. 

Yes, I believed Mother. But most of the time when I turned a teenager... I am starting to not like the rules as I wanna be part of the fight too, I wanna protect too, I don't wanna fucking* hide.

But what can I do? I wanna be part of the pack's war to prove what I can do for the pack but... but I am already eighteen and I still cannot shift into my wolf form. I know that I was supposed to have an idea about the wolf inside me but he still did not make any signal to me. He was probably still sleeping. My inner wolf even doesn't like me.

I just watch them fight and I don't know how I control myself to not step outside to join them. I saw how brave and mighty Alpha Czar was, fighting in his werewolf form at first and then shifting to his wolf form to make himself faster when the outsiders tried to escape. 

I saw Beta Amir triumphantly shout when the outsiders were gone. As always, he did the least but now rejoicing the most as if he was the one who did best for the fight they had. Moron!

As I watched the villagers go outside their houses to celebrate with our protectors, I went outside too. 

"Solo!" I heard Clemencia's soft voice and when I looked at her she waved her hand. I smiled at her and was about to go to her when I saw Beta Amir take Clemencia and started to dance with her. 

 I saw the awkwardness that Clemencia felt by looking at me, I know her eyes were saying how she hates Beta Amir too. How I wish that the moon goddess would show us the sign that I and Clemencia were mates so no one could touch Clemencia anymore. 

Clemencia was just looking at me as I was looking at her. When Beta Amir stopped dancing with her,  I know she felt embarrassed while taking steps to get near me. 

"How I hate him," Clemencia said.

I forced myself to smile so Clemencia might forget the cringes she felt because of the advances Beta Amir did to her. I saw how our beta kept on touching her while they were dancing. 

"I hope that the moon goddess will make you find your mate soon, Clem..." I comforted her. 

I wanna say that I wish that the moon goddess would make me her mate but I can't. Clemencia was the nicest she-wolf and my only friend, if she had no feelings for me then I would lose her even as a friend.

"Did you find your mate, Solo?" she asked me with a sad smile. 

I made a sideward movement of my head as a gesture that I still had no idea about it when she started to make a sad face. 

"Why?" I curiously asked.

"Nah! I just wanna say that whoever your mate will be... she will be... she will surely be very lucky to have someone like you, Solo."

I wanna say that I am sure she will be my mate. I am always praying for it. 

"I... I hope that it would be y–"

"This will be a double celebration as I already found my mate!" Beta Amir's loud voice made me stop confessing my feelings to Clemencia as all attention was caught by him. 

"We are getting married soon, Solo. Our beta is my mate..." Clemencia whispered but I heard it all. 

I heard it all...