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HIS GAME

last update Last Updated: 2025-08-02 03:12:03

The only person I would admit this to would be myself, nobody else would ever find out about the fact that the one time it actually crossed my mind to call my girlfriend, is to distract myself from thinking about how another man’s lips tastes.

Viv answers as the guilt kicks in, her sleepy voice coming through the speakers only makes me squeeze my eyes tight in guilt.

‘Come on, get up. This is your girlfriend’s sleepy voice, react to it or something.’

“Eli?”

Nothing.

There’s no reaction down there, not even a stir.

“Hey, did I wake you?” I think back to the last time I saw her, a few hours ago, when she drove off to meet with Diamond, so much has happened since then, it seems like weeks ago.

“No, no. I am supposed to be up in a few hours anyway, what’s up?” she asks, clearing her throat.

The eagerness in how she answers digs the knife further down my chest.

“I just… wanted to hear your voice.” I answer truthfully.

There’s a pause on the line, so much so that I think the connectio
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  • The chaos of him   EPILOGUE

    EPILOGUE Jesse went on his knee to ask me to marry him five times after that.Once every month, on the same date he had asked me to marry him. I knew it was coming, but each time he did I was a crying mess, he would laugh and tell me the joke about how useful he was at wiping my tears. It turned into a running joke between us. We’d sleep together and he would tell me he was very useful in bed.We’d work out together, he would hand me a water bottle and joked about how useful he was. He wasn’t pressuring me to accept his ring, he was joking about it casually, and when he did something I didn’t like he would go, “Shit, I am not being very useful right now, Golden boy won’t accept my ring!”I would laugh and forget about scolding him. On the fourth month, fourth try, when he asked, “Too soon?”I shook my head and my thoughts came tumbling out with the tears. “You’re twenty four! What twenty year four old is thinking about settling down a

  • The chaos of him   THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND I

    Whoever said that line, ‘don’t count your eggs before they hatch’ were unto something.I am very unlike Jesse in the aspect that I weigh all my pros and cons, all the different possibilities and possible outcomes of a situation before going in, toes first. Jesse dives in and then goes with whatever life throws at him.I ditched my Elijahness, and pulled a Jesse.Didn’t think through at all that we’ve known each other three months and I am already moving in with him. We’re so very different, and we haven’t discussed those differences, yet I am moving in to live with him. On the drive to my house, which by the way doesn’t feel like home any more for some reason, it feels more like an old lover, we were dressed in fresh clothes, I had taken the flowers and his letter inside, planning on reading it tonight. We laughed, planned for our new and exciting life together.Talked about random different things, played our favorite song over and over, singing along with the artist, eyes meetin

  • The chaos of him   WHAT COULD GO WRONG?

    We only manage to hold out to the stairs.His fingers find my hole and I am a shivering mess, most of the sounds I made may have never been heard before. He plays with my hole, rubbing across it, teasing it, watching me react, telling me how much he loves the way I tremble for him. I can’t count how many times I came already.His palm squeezes my ass cheeks, palming the flesh, fondling, while his other hand runs across the hole. “It’s so soft. Already so soft for me.” he purrs,I can’t stop my body from trembling. I want him inside me so terribly, I need him. He knows this.“Have you ever thought of using toys baby?” he asks, like this is a normal conversation, while I am begging in a newly invented language for him to slip his finger into me.“If you don’t answer, I may stop.”“No, I haven’t.” I answer quickly, so my brain know how to still speak in English, which is good. He chuckles.“I haven’t either, I don’t like them so much.”Nodding, I wonder why he’s brought it up, it’s

  • The chaos of him   HE TASTES DIVINE

    I’m sure we broke like all the traffic laws on our way here.Through my sex clouded mind, I remembered Viv was leaving, the house would be empty, what better place to do it than his house?? Our mouths find each other’s the second he pulled the door open for me, his letter to me, the one I haven’t properly read, and my bouquet don’t make it into the house. My hands are too busy trying to pull his clothes off, they were safe on the car seat, unlike the sun glasses that fell off my face unto the pavement, I’m pretty sure it cracked from the impact, but his hot mouth, his breaths, the small groans that fall into my mouth from his, they are all too distracting to check. His hand slides to the back of my neck, pulling me in, and his lips claim mine with the type of heat that makes my knees weak. “Jesse.” I moan into his mouth,He groans in response, pressing me into the body of his car.I am dizzy with want. My fingers slide underneath his clothes, exploring the hard planes of his ch

  • The chaos of him   HIS REJECTION

    It was easier to write the letter than to exchange it.I managed to forget everything I had planned to write for him, and to him. My brain fogged up way too quickly, I started to panic. His hand wrapped around mine from across the table, eyes warm, he smiles at me.“It’s just me, whatever you say, I hear you.”My nerves fizzle to nothing, nodding in acknowledgement and determination, ready to sweep him off his feet with my words, he nods back. From my heart… A stolen glance at my bouquet by my side, and I start writing, doing over a few lines, and finding myself actually enjoying writing down my feelings. “We’ve come a very long way. Asides the academy.” I say with a soft smile, thinking back to the first time he showed me he could easily take the cuffs off, that’s when I knew he was no joke. “Right? I have learnt so many things about you that stalking would have never told me.”I chuckle, “Like what?” “Like how you taste..”Thank the heavens I wasn’t drinking any liquids at

  • The chaos of him   MR. LETTERMAN

    Turns out he had also prepared an assortment of flowers for me.A bouquet of different types of flowers. It was so beautiful, and for some reason it fills me with happiness I cannot seem to contain. This isn’t the first time he was giving me flowers, and I still don’t know what to do with them, but it doesn’t stop my eyes from straying to the bouquet, or the thousands of butterflies flapping their wings at the base of my stomach. “You like them that much?” he asks me,Looking up at him, I don’t feel like hiding my smile, unable to get a word out past the bubble of excitement stuck in my throat. “I’m glad, it would have been weird if I was the only one enjoying my rose.” he says bringing the single stem to his nose.He has said how much he loves that I got him the flower, and because it was a single stem, he could bring it anywhere. His hand in mine feels very natural as we walk.I had thought two men holding hands and holding flowers would earn us looks, but I haven’t being able

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