I remember, when I used to live with my family I was never happy. Always criticizing and finding flaws in myself and my surroundings, which used to make me feel low. Insecurities brewing more than the actual reality.
My fingers don't wrap around my arm.
I wish my lips were thinner.
I look disfigured.
I am abnormally tall.
Hair...so lifeless and dull.
Eyes so sad, so sad and brown.
I would look at others and wonder how it felt to be comfortable in their own skin, their own body, and accepting it. Loving themselves and not being bothered by what people said their supposed imperfections were. It came to such a point where I would stop looking at the mirror and avoid it at all costs. Not that I needed it because my family never failed to do so. A constant reminder of what I had and much more.
Things were different when I met Liza. She made me feel strangely okay to be me. A concept lost, new and strangely welcoming. It felt different to not be shamed for looking a certain way, looking like me, when they would go to extreme lengths to look presentable and perfect like a twisted doll house with perfectly etched smiles on their faces. Fake yet charming enough to pretend and lure others in believing what wasn't there.
That familiar feeling came rushing to me faster than a cold breath of lifeless air, gripping me, clenching my soul as I shrivelled and looked at the perfect man sitting on the bench placed near the piano. He was playing a tune, smooth and slow, too busy to notice me. The sound of the door must have disturbed his bubble because he spared a glance towards the doorway without looking at me in the eye.
I quietly went to my seat in the middle of the classroom and took out my notebook, trying to distract myself from the feeling, brushing it off. I was done being that way.
My eyes darted towards the man in front of the class to take a quick inquisitive peek as the other kids piled into the class, ready to start their lessons, while he kept playing the piano, gliding his fingers on the keys as if he was touching something very delicate.
Now that I could not see his eyes, I was able to see his lean yet strong built, his features were sharp. Sharp jaw, sharp nose, almost like the distinctive features of Russian ethnicity. He had brown hair that looked softer than my pillow, shoulders not too broad but perfect. He was wearing a full-sleeved white shirt and pants, a formal attire of perfect poise. I could not have a glimpse of his shoes, but I am sure that they were shiny and polished like a mirror. There was this odd aura surrounding him, heavy in the air, demanding control and domination.
This strange new man was anything but a student.
And I had a good guess who he was.
He was our new music teacher.
During these nineteen years of my life, I have never come across a novel or movie where they show the reality. It's such a great irony that whatever they show never happens in real life. Or perhaps they do, oblivious to the many people all across the world to whom it's just a piece of fiction. We will never ever know. We have these wild imaginations like the avatar, hunger games, twilight saga, fast and furious, and others. I am not ashamed to say that some of the above-mentioned movies are indeed my favorite. But that's the thing about fiction.A cow lives on a tree. Every story has two sides, some have more, and most would never be heard. I wonder if it's better that way. Not knowing the dirty, cruel, true side. It makes others feel better, but it makes us, me feel worse every time. Not that I tell my story to anyone, never have, but sometimes I just can't stop telling it to myself and what follows after, better not be revealed. Comparing what has happ
I'd nevergivenmuchthought as to how I'd die. But dying in the place of someone I love seems like a good way to go. I had just started watching the movie when the doorbell rang. I glanced at the old analogue clock hanging on the wall. 10:30 pm It was not that late, but undoubtedly very late for someone to come to an isolated house amongst the woods with no other houses around. Lisa was not supposed to be home because she was spending the night with Max, and there is no one else who is supposed to be standing outside my door at this time of the night. So I did what everyone should do. I peeped through the peephole. It was quite difficult to see who was on the other side because of the darkness, but I could see a silhouette. Thesilhouetteof aman. There was something just not right about the situation as a heavy feeling settled in my stomach, or maybe it was just the cold and dark and fog that cr
When I used to live with my family, I always used to find myself very lonely. I did not have any friends who I could trust enough to tell everything. I did try once, and it ended up very badly. After moving out of my parent's house, I thought things will be better, and I will be able to open up, but boy was I wrong. I guess I would have stayed alone for the rest of my life if I haven't met Liza at the club where I worked that day.
Have you ever been frozen or paralyzed with shock? Have you ever in your wildest dream imagined that your teacher would come to your home? If no, then you are lucky. If yes, then you'll understand what happened to me. "You guys know each other?" He had a confused look on his face, like he didn't know what to say. It helped me to break out of my trance. "Yes, miss Dawson is my student. We met today at school." He was staring right at me like he didn't expect this himself, but there was no surprise in his voice. His stare was very eerily creepy, and I couldn't shake off the weird feeling. "Awesome dude! You never told me that teaching has so many perks! After all, you get to meet such pretty ladies." Ivan winked at me, which earned him a glare from my teacher and blush from me. The silence that followed made the situation more awkward as I went mute and Mr. Dimitri was speaking in monosyllabic words when suddenly one of the windows in the living
There are very rare moments in my life when I have truly felt lucky. I remember the day when I got an envelope with my name on it. It was the first time I received a letter, and that happened to be my scholarship invitation. I was so happy that day. I felt very lucky when I met Liza who helped me to get out of that shag where I used to live after I left home. I guess it's the third time I truly felt lucky when my phone started ringing. I excused myself from the dinner table, picked up my phone, and went to my room. Ivan was not bothered by the interruption, but my teacher on the other side of the table narrowed his eyes. "Rose! Guess what? Max's parents are not returning home for the weekend! We've got the whole house to ourselves! So Max asked me to stay back for the weekend...You know I can't say no to him, and it's my golden opportunity to get closer to him. We've also decided to throw a party, but we are not sure yet. So I was thinking-" Liza just kept on
I have this odd habit of stretching and yawning when I wake up in the morning, and the worst part of it all is that it's contagious. Anyone around in two feet distance can easily get infected, and the symptoms mostly consists of well, yawning and stretching. That's exactly what happened to Ivan when he came to the kitchen. "Rose, I am in love with your bed, I slept like a baby. It's so comfortable. What do I need to do to make it mine?" Ivan rubbed his eyes like a baby and stifled another yawn. "I don't think it's the bed. It has something to do with the tree in the backyard. I don't remember the name, but the previous owner said that its flowers release a certain kind of scent with a strong, potent drug that can knock out anyone if highly consumed or smelled. So I am assuming it was the scent of the flowers..." It was kinda funny how Ivan's eyes turned wide with shock and his mouth was left hanging open. "Where is Mr. Dimitri? Is he still sleeping?" Th
I looked in front of me and stared into the eyes of a stranger. Her brown eyes with a perfect eyeliner stared at me. Her raven hair cascading in waves framed her face in a perfectly beautiful way. Her dress which was quite short against her liking touched her thighs in neat pleats. Her chest looked more fuller in the heart-shaped neckline, and she was wearing the one thing she never used to wear. Heels. Her makeup is minimal to avoid looking too desperate. As I looked at the mirror, I couldn't believe it was my reflection staring back at me. I never thought I could look pretty like other girls. I never even tried to look pretty to avoid unnecessary attention and even though I was looking pretty right now, I was not happy with the change. I've always been a closed book, hiding in sweatshirts and converses, but today it seemed like I was more vulnerable and bare than ever. I didn't even want to go to that party, but Liza would kill me if I ditched her. So I gra
Green was everywhere,Green every time.Green was hypnotizing me,Green pulling me towards it, like darkness towards light.Green was close to meAndGreen was staring at me. Sheisgoingtodie. ***** Endless pain. That's what I felt when I opened my eyes. Someone was beating a hammer on my head. I held my head in between my hands, trying to clutch it away from the severe pain. I sat up and leaned on the headboard of the bed, trying to find some support. Needless to say, I was having my first hangover, and it was not thrilling at all. I tried to see where I was, and it relieved me to see that I was in my room. Let me rephrase it. In my messy room. It seems like a war cut loose in my room which ended up with casualties such as a broken vase, a toppled chair, books on the desk somehow scattered on the floor, and my clothes from last night including my bra and underwear. Wait, what am I wearing now?