4.

Hey Nate,

Did you do a weird thing? Let's see. You read comments on an online support group, saw one that caught your interest, couldn't suppress the urge to talk to the girl that wrote said comment, sent her the oddest email she's ever read, and then decided to forget that he ever sent the email in the first place.

Is that weird? I'll leave you to answer that for yourself. 

And yes, I do have a sense of humor. Usually the dark kind, but it's still humor nonetheless, isn't it? But nowadays, very few things make me laugh. So,I don't know what to make of it. Does that still count as having a good sense of humor?

Should I be worried that you refuse to tell me how you got to know my handle? Or is this you being mysterious? Either way, it's fine. I won't bother you about it again. 

I write everything, though I've never once completed a book. For the life of me, I can't. I'm not sure if it's lack of dedication, or writer's block, or whatever. And yes, poetry is my jam nowadays. You know what people say? It speaks to the soul, or something like that. I started with poetry about two years ago( I used to think only sappy people loved that shit), but now, not anymore. Especially recently. 

In fact, poetry is the only thing I've written in a year. 

I guess I now believe that you're actually 17. Bear in mind that if you're a liar, and you're some creepy stalker here in Colorado, and I find out the truth, I'll release my guard dog on you. He's a German Shepherd, and he's really huge, so be warned. 

(I'm trying to be playful here, but I am serious though.)

I won't say anything regarding the whole "mentality changing" thing, or about us being alike. Because I'm pretty sure my words would have the ability to make you see things differently, and I don't want you disappointed just yet. 

Thank you, for trying to make me laugh back there. The comment about being scared of dolls. I'm sorry to say this, but I didn't laugh at all. And I'll definitely tell you when I get my pet tiger. I'd prolly be living in a cabin in the woods with little to no wifi, no human interaction, while sitting in a rocking chair beside the fireplace, holding my shot gun. Because sadly, tigers and human beings can't live in the same space. 

Rubbish, honestly!

I dont really see the need to tell you my last name. Call it paranoia, but you knowing my name is Emma is enough to me .

I'm a horror freak, yes. You're really good at guessing. I wish I could say the same for me. One time, when I was 14, my friends and I were playing cards, and they asked me to pick an ace of spades from the six cards laid out on the floor. I made five different guesses and none were right!

We had a good laugh that day, at my expense. 

So, you're smart. I'm not really surprised. I'm more of a B's and C's kinda girl. I'm sporty too, but volleyball, please. I can't run track, or play football ( for fear of breaking my legs), but I jog sometimes. 

I don't even remember the last time I did that. I'll have to start jogging again one of these days. 

It should be clear that I love English more than any other subject in the world. It's like, the one class I can't ever sleep in, no matter how hard I try. Maybe that's one of the reasons I write. Because I love reading a lot. I'm pretty sure your writing skills would improve if only you read novels and scripts more. I'm almost 100% sure that you don't read books often. 

(If I'm wrong, then there's no hope left for me. I mean, this is really obvious. )

Maybe this is weird, but I have no idea what I want to be later on. I do know that I'll write, because I'm really good at it, but now, I don't know if that's what I'll specialise in, or if something else will catch my interest soon. God, I sound so uncertain about how my life is gonna be.

About the dolls thing, i wont say I'm scared of them exactly, i just don't like them. I don't run or faint when i see them. It's like, that sort of dislike you have for your worst food. You can suck it up and eat it, but you'd much rather not. And you're lucky you aren't scared of 'em either. I have a bad habit of teasing people. 

I'm not in the best of moods today, Nate. And maybe I'll tell you why that is, but not now. Your letter is the one thing I actually looked forward to today. I'm sorry if I sound like a dying cat. I'm trying not to. I promise that it won't be the same next time. Okay?

Oh, I almost forgot something. You said football was something that beckoned to you. It clearly has sentimental value. And how can running clear your mind? I actually don't understand that. When I run, all I can think about is water. And dying as well, but I try not to think about that. 

I'll say the same thing you said to me. If you wanna talk about anything, I'm only an email away. 

(That's not what you said exactly, but if you want to talk to me about something, then talk to me. I'm not a very good listener, but I'm a good reader. So, it's kinda like the same thing in this situation)

Emma( Emma is actually my middle name).