Chapter 5

Jace.

It's the day my love is supposed to come back home. Mum and Dad had everything prepared for her arrival. Meanwhile, I have been feeling tense since morning, contemplating various scenarios that will occur when she gets here.

I keep staring at my watch, counting the seconds as they slowly turn to minutes and minutes to hours, and I never imagined a day could be this long. I haven't even left the living room since I woke up, and that was five hours ago.

Seven hours later, my senses catch her scent before she can even appear. On cue, Mum rushes out of the door with a phone pressed to her ear, and I quickly stand up. She's finally here.

I feel so damn nervous. Please give us a second chance, Goddess.

It's time, Jace. Time to make everything right.

My dad pulls his SUV over at the garage, and Mum rushes to open the door for her. Dad was the one to pick her up while my mother spent the whole day in the kitchen preparing every kind of her favorite dish.

My heart palpitate wildly when she enters the front doors, laughing. Ana stops a step away from me when she notices my presence but doesn't say anything. I am sure my heartbeat can be heard from a mile away. I want to move over and hold her, but my feet don't oblige. Furthermore, I know she is still mad at me and her reaction won't be favorable.

So the only thing I can do right now is wait for her to make the first move. That is, if the heavens favor me.

I don't know, should I say something? We are only staring at each other and it's becoming uncomfortable. Did she miss me?

Her scent hasn't changed one bit. Floral and alluring. Her delicate scent mixed with a soft floral perfume she uses, makes my wolf perk up from the darkness he has been hiding for the last two years. I can feel him now and it's taking me a huge amount of control not to jump on her.

Everything else about her is not as she left. My Ana has changed. Alot.

The current Ana is not the girl I knew anymore.

The long, black hair that I loved so much is now transformed to a shoulder length and dyed golden. I fucking adored that hair. She knows it.

The multiple piercings on her ears and the two tattoos on each of her wrists take me aback. If I didn't know her better, I could have argued that the girl standing before me is not Ana.

Her eyes used to look at me with so much love, in contrast to the empty stare she's giving me right now. As if she doesn't know who I am, Ana goes back to laughing at whatever Mum was telling her.

Goddess! I missed that laugh. So enticing and the most beautiful sound I have ever heard.

I missed how those two little dimples would appear every time she was happy. I would always place a kiss on them when they emerged. She was so soft and adorable.

I want to hold her again like I always did.

I wrecked us, the lovely bond we shared before being mated. It's as if our hearts knew we belonged to each other from the beginning. Or maybe the Goddess sent her to me earlier.

"Mind helping with the bags, son?" Mother snaps me out of my reverie, with an almost hesitant smile. For two years, I can barely count how many times my mother has talked to me. My dad is worse, It's like he silently disowned me.

I am a great deal of disappointment to everyone around me. Especially to my mate and My wolf who became unresponsive. I haven't shifted for two years. My life has been so empty and all I could feel was pain and more pain.

I spent every night in her room, just to get the slight scent that gradually faded away. I keep reminiscing about how beautiful we were and how we would have been if only I made a smart choice. Fate proved to me that I'm useless without my mate.

Just an empty vessel with no meaning or ounce of life at all.

"Sure" I mumble, grabbing the big two pink suitcases from the maids.

"Come on darling, I want to hear everything. Don't leave anything out" Mother exclaims dragging Ana by her hand further into the living room, and I can't help but follow her with my eyes. She is so beautiful.

She used to hate short dresses and shorts. Today Ana is in black ragged jean shorts and a big black sweatshirt. Something she wouldn't dare if I forced her into.

The curves she didn't have before are on display, adorning her long smooth legs. She looks hot. More mature.

"Okay, Mother" she drawls out as she always did when she didn't want to talk about something.

I know she still feels the mate bond like I do. A mate bond is sacred and I regret messing with it. It only takes the death of a mate to make it no more.

Mere words of rejection can't erase what the moon herself created. I believe I have paid for my mistakes well enough.

Fate made sure that my days and nights were nothing but pure torture. My wolf forced me to spend the first six months in the wilderness. I was in human form because I couldn't shift and it was hell. He was still present, but after six months he disappeared completely.

The cold nights were unbearable, I had to survive on wild fruits and raw meat. It was not easy especially when I had to keep myself safe from the wild.

For the first time in a long time, I feel hungry and eager to have this dinner. My hungry wolf appeared as soon as he smelled her and I hope he will not disappear from me again.

I don't even know if she will listen to my reasons. I should have just told her. She hates me now.

The dining table is quiet and all I can do is stare at her. Ana hasn't glimpsed at me even for a second and it's breaking my heart.

I wish she knew she was the only girl I have ever loved. Mate bond or not. Ana has always had my heart in her palms, and I'm not willing to take it back from her anytime.

"So Ana, you missed home?" Dad starts a conversation and she looks up from her plate for the first time.

I can tell she feels uncomfortable, especially with me in the room.

"Yeah," she mumbles, stuffing a huge amount of food in her mouth. We used to do that every time Mum asked something we wanted to keep a secret.

This means she didn't want to come back. Will she continue ignoring me and leave after the stupid party?

"So what's good in Canada?" Dad continues pushing, and the discomfort on her face is clear to everyone at the table.

"Save the questions for later, Honey. Eat more, Sweetheart " Mother saves her from the hustle and she nods with a grateful smile.

A few minutes later, Ana stands up with her plate and walks to the kitchen. This is my chance. I need to talk to her while she is alone.

I will just say hi and see what happens.

Grabbing my plate, I ignore the questioning glances from my parents and quickly follow her. She smells so good, the perfume she wore complements her natural scent.

My mate puts the dishes in the sink and quickly turns around. The haste movement causes her to unintentionally bump into me and she quickly moves away.

"Oh! Sorry" she whispers turning to leave but I quickly hold her hand. I carelessly place the plate on the sink but Ana doesn't turn to look at me. The Way her body shivers from my touch reminds me of that day.

The day she cried in my arms, begging me to stay but all I did was ignore her as if she didn't matter.

Goddess, Please forgive me.

These horrible thoughts keep coming back and they break my heart even more.

Slowly, I lower myself to my knees in surrender. I will do anything, I don't care if anyone sees my vulnerability right now, as long as she forgives me.

"What's wrong?" She whispers, as her emotionless eyes stare at me. That causes me to helplessly burst into tears, and I can't help but let them flow freely.

I lost my Ana.

There is lack of emotions in her eyes or interest in her voice when she interacts with me. It seems as though I'm just a dull stranger to her.

"I messed up," I say between sniffles letting her hand go. Death is better than this cruel feeling in my heart. I wish I could rip it out to stop feeling this way.

I helplessly watch her glance at me for a second longer before walking away. The same way I did that night.

Karma is surely bitching me up.

I fall to the ground and allow myself to cry. Maybe it will help ease the stress.

I have been acting strong but I can't anymore. I lived with hope, I thought the love she had for me would overcome her hate. I was wrong.

This is reality.

Ana moved on.

I'm so immersed in my pain that I don't sense a presence behind me.

"We make mistakes, son" Mother crouches beside me and places her hand on my shoulder. She pulls my head to her chest and slowly rubs my back "And sometimes we pay for them in the hardest ways" I hold her tight as I let my silent sobs out.

"Just like you are doing" She kisses my head but today, it doesn't feel warm.

"I lost her mum, how will I survive knowing she hates me and I can no longer have her?"

"Ana doesn't hate you, Jace. Let it all out today. Tomorrow morning when you wake up, start being the man you were not two years ago. Show Ana that you care, and let your actions show how much you love her. When her anger dissipates, explain to her your reasons for hurting her. I trust you can win your girl back, son. Don't let my teachings go to waste." She carefully whispers and I eagerly nod.

I can't give up on the first trial.

I will get her back. I have to.