I feel no better once I settle into class, the teacher and students around me carrying on as usual. I raise my hands a few times, even though I don’t know the answers, just hoping to be called on so someone will have said my name or looked in my direction enough for me to know I’m still alive.Did I die in the car crash? Was everything after that just my brain’s weird way of fantasizing my life into continuance? And now reality’s set in, my existence is fading into nothingness?My mouth fills with the taste of wood from the pencil I have been gnawing at relentlessly, sparking an idea. I let the pencil fall to the floor, thinking someone will look up or pick it up to hand it back. But nothing. It quietly clicks against the floor as it rolls right out into the middle of the room, completely untouched and seemingly unnoticed.My foot bounces wildly underneath my desk, my eyes darting to the clock on the wall every few seconds. I can’t stop reaching down to dig through my purse, forgettin
And anyway, telling her about those moments will only ensure they never happen again. However fucked up it may be, it’s not a bridge I’m willing to burn just yet.“I don’t know what you want!” I bark back at her, clutching the ache in my gut. “I haven’t known what you’ve wanted this whole time! You’re all fucking crazy! Ganging up on me for no reason!”“Is that what you think?” she smiles arrogantly. “That we don’t have better things to do with our time than chase you around? Get over yourself. We’d be happy to just forget you ever existed like the meaningless nothing you are. But we have to protect ourselves. So here we are.”“Protect yourselves!?” I scoff in disbelief, my voice betraying me with too high of a pitch. “What the hell do you need to be protected from? I’m the one that’s being treated like some kind of prey. You’ve gone after me relentlessly from day one!”“I’m not an idiot,” she growls back. “You know more than you’re letting on.” She nods back to Vincent and Trey who p
“I’ll do it,” Vivian protests. “I don’t want you putting your hands on this filthy little cunt anymore.”Her jealousy gives me a momentary thrill, but I’m quickly brought back to the danger I’m in.I hear a scuffle from the two of them fighting over something, but barely. One of my ears is sharply pressed down beneath the weight of my head, and my other ear is being crushed underneath Vincent’s hand. All I can hear is the fierce and rapid pounding of my own heart in fear of whatever it is they’re getting ready to do.With a quick and sudden pull to my top, I hear the fabric rip around my right arm. I assume their motives are perverted and sexual, but then…“What the fuck!” I cry out in a shrill sob as a sharp, searing pain cuts into my shoulder.I can tell by the size of the hands that Emmett won out over Vivian, which I want to take some small comfort in. He seems to be leaning toward taking it easier on me. After all, if I’m dead, he can’t fuck me. So, in a weird, twisted way, he’s
I feel completely helpless. And as tired as I am of going through this alone, the only time I feel safe is when I’m alone. And even then, I’m plagued with paranoia over what will happen next. Especially now with this tracking device in my arm. I feel broken. Like something is wrong with me. I don’t know how I can ever go back to living a normal life after this.Thankfully, I’m able to avoid my parents as I race to my bathroom. The spot on my shoulder where they sewed in the implant is still bleeding, and I have to bandage it up just to keep the blood off of my clothes.I decide to take a bath to soothe my aching muscles, filling the hot steaming water with every bath product I can find that might bring me some peace and comfort.I lay back into the bath water, my body still tingling and my legs feeling almost numb. The lavender scented steam rising up should comfort me. But nothing seems to be able to do that anymore.I think back on the life I had before coming to WJ Prep and this El
“He hurts you?” Malcolm asks, his face slightly twisted.“They all do.”He shakes his head, turning briefly to the driver’s side window with his lips pursed before refocusing on the road. “That’s not like him. I know it’s going to be hard to convince you…but anything he’s doing is just out of fear. He didn’t ask to be born into that fucked up family of his. He’s just as much of a pawn as the rest of us.”I stare at him as he drives, searching for some sign of an ulterior motive. Doubt. Anything that tells me he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. But he’s filled with resolve. Completely confident that Emmett is somehow different than his flock of abusers.My head flings back against my seat. I can’t handle this right now. The last thing I need is another gnawing voice in my ear trying to convince me that Emmett’s behavior is excusable.I’ve watched him dump trash on Lily’s head. He manhandled me in front of his asshole Elite friends. He’s verbally abused me. Humiliated me. Threatene
As soon as I have the thought of gratitude, his arms wrap around me tightly, one hand wriggling down to unbuckle my seatbelt before he drags me into his lap.“What the fuck are you doing!?” I shout, kicking and squirming to get away.“We’re gonna take a little drive,” he explains in a hauntingly snide tone. “And I want you close to me.”All I can think of is the last time these fuckers took me for a drive, and the time after that when Emmett tried again to lure me away in his car. My hands and arms flail frantically for escape, but he quickly grips onto me in every direction. He holds me down long enough to secure his stretched seat belt over the both of us. With one arm held firmly across my chest, holding my arms down, a black cloth falls over my eyes.“No!” I yell hopelessly, not wanting to be blindfolded. But the cloth ties tight across my vision, blocking out the outside world. “Emmett, please…don’t do that!”Vincent and Trey cackle. They love it when I’m struggling.I finally gi
“I’m going as fast as I can,” I whine back, trying to hurry.He huffs over, slinging back the curtain and reaching in to turn the faucets off.“What are you doing!?” I cry, looking at him in shock. “I’m almost done. Just give me a minute.”“You’re out of time, princess,” he sneers, throwing a towel at me, but not until after he takes a good long slow look at my wet and naked body. I’m quick to cover up from his gaze, figuring if he can’t even have the decency to give me a full five minutes in the shower, he doesn’t get to see me naked.Anger sparks in his eyes as I cover up, robbing him of his eye candy. His hand grips my elbow tightly as he yanks me out, banging my arm harshly against the sink countertop.“Shit!” I shout, looking down to see fresh red blood pooling out into the beads of water still dripping across my skin. Just another reminder of who he really is, making me kick myself for every moment of weakness I had last night.“We don’t have time for all of this,” he moans impa
He plops into a chair in the corner as his leg starts bobbing up and down. He presses his palm to his mouth and looks anxiously around the room, fighting hard not to let my words affect him.“I can’t believe I let you,” I mused. “Something about the way you commanded me…I just couldn’t refuse. I guess you still have that power over me somehow.”“I wasn’t expecting to feel like that when I kissed you,” he responds with a surprising tenderness.His recollection of it makes sense. The way he seemed confused and tormented as he grabbed at my body with an almost punishing touch. He hated me for the feelings I stirred up inside of him. He was just doing what he was told, scoping me out and luring me to WJ Prep. He never meant to feel anything for me.“I still never expect to feel that way when I kiss you,” he added in a disappointed mutter.“But you do,” I offer optimistically, thinking maybe I’ve found my way into him. “And I do too. There’s something between us, Emmett. Enough that…surely