Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

Recovery

I was discharged after two week and Dave took me home. He carried me up to the room and laid me down slowly, he covered me with the sheet and made to leave but i held him back

"Stay with me" i pleaded, my voice shaking

"I'm here okay" replied Dave as he climbed into the bed with me

"How are you feeling?" he asked

"I'm okay now" she replied, she closed her eyes and dozed off. 

The next morning Dave brought her breakfast in bed

"Honey get up and have something to eat so you can take your meds"

He helped her sit up and then placed the tray over her legs

"I made you bread and sauce with bacon, your favorite"

I smiled and started eating, I was still in so much pain, every inch of my body pains me

"I hate that they did this to you"

I paused for a moment and turned to look at him

"Why were they asking for you, what do they want with you" I asked 

"I don't know" he replied

"I hissed, so we are still doing this, they said you took something from them, why won't you tell me anything" 

"Baby, am sorry this happened to you, I am, but this is work and I can't discuss it with you, it will put you in danger"

"You didn't tell me anything and it still put me in danger, I need to know what you are into Dave" 

Dave's phone started to ring

"Honey eat your food okay, I need to take this, I will be back"

He went to the bathroom to answer the call as i continued to eat. He came out shortly after

"I need to go babe" he said 

"Are you being serious right now" i asked

"I know babe but I will be back Asap, will you be okay by yourself?"

"Sure' i replied sarcastically"

Dave made to kiss my forehead but I just shifted

"I'm sorry babe, I will be back" he finally said before he went downstairs to meet the agents guarding the place

"Nobody in without my permission" 

"Yes Sir" they replied

A while later a call entered my phone, it was the Alex, I just sat there and let it ring. I continued to eat my meal and then took my prescription after the meal. Later that evening, Dave came in, but i was asleep. He went to bed and the next morning he left before i woke

After two months, i have started walking on my own, i am now feeling much better, my bruises are barely noticeable. The agents guarding our house has been dismissed. My phone alarm rang, i have an appointment with my psychologist, Doctor Fortune

"What's that for?" Dave asked

"Nothing" 

Dave proceeded to go downstairs while i went into the bathroom to take a shower before preparing. After I  was done, i went down stairs

"I wanna see a friend, I would be back" i said, "Aright, be careful and call me if there is anything at all" 

"I will"

I gave him a kiss and left.

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In the psychologist office

"Tell me how you are feeling today" Doc Fortune asked

"I feel fine"

"Is there anything bothering you? anything at all?"

"No, nothing" 

"How is your relationship with Dave lately?" asked Doc Fortune

I did not respond to that, i mean things hasn't been good between me and Dave, i wouldn't even know where to start, he lied to me all these years, put me in danger, I was tortured and harassed and almost killed and he wouldn't even leave the damn job to take good care of me. When i didn't respond Doc Fortune took off her glasses and said 

"may I remind you that this is a safe space, you can tell me anything"

I looked at her, took a deep breath and started

"I have been getting this feeling, I can't seem to shake it and...and every time I want to talk to Dave about this, I don't even know how to begin or what to say and I end up just wanting to have sex, is that weird?"

"No, no it's totally normal"

"What is the feeling like, what do you actually feel?" 

"I don't know, scared, watched, afraid someone is watching me" 

You are still experiencing post traumatic stress, it doesn't just go away, it takes time As for the sexual craving, you can't seem to express yourself through words so you just find another way to do so, doesn't matter the means, could be through poem, drawing etc in your case, it seems you are covering up with sex, it gives you closure. Sarah, you know at some point you are going to have to talk to him about this, it's killing you, keeping it all inside, that isn't healthy

"He wouldn't even listen if I tried" i replied 

"Then make him listen" she advised

"Sarah you are a strong woman, you are a survivor, I am sure you will find a way to let him know what is going on with you".