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BIRTHDAY PHOBIA
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HIM ALL ALONG TOMORROW IS ANOTHER DAY, RIGHT?
NICHOLAS:“Are you hurt?”It was the first thing I should have asked when I heard the pot crash and saw its broken pieces below his feet, but I was foolish to care about a mere pot and perishable flower than Greg. “You hurt me, yes.”“I am sorry. And the broken pot, were you cut?”“Now you care.”“I am sorry.”“Sorry? Your sorry can’t fix me back!”“Yeah, I know. I am a mess.”“Nick, I was joking.”I don’t need his explanation to understand what he was playing at. Nevertheless, I am sorry.Apologising for my nonsensical actions didn’t last long; I was distracted. Greg’s beautiful face shone against the flames from the hearth, and his rough hair left him sexy and alluring.The sparkles from the hearth are fading and will soon be leaving the room on the dim light from the lantern. Yet I saw each blink of his eyelashes flickering and lips parting outwardly with every word as clear as under the sunlight.Perhaps it is all in my head. But the moment he stretched his neck, exposing his smoo
HIM ALL ALONG RUINED
NICHOLAS:I woke up to a sneezing Greg. He is snuggled to me and wrapped in the blanket. The weather had gone colder in the middle of the night and left his trachea blocked and frozen.“Hey.” He opened his eyes to my call, coughed and hummed on my chest. “You caught a cold. I will make you some tea.”I rose from the sofa and fetched my clothes from the floor. I went into my track pants, hung the polo on my shoulder, and marched to the kitchen.Greg didn’t stop coughing. I feared he would become worse and require medical attention. So, I opted for ginger and garlic tea to save us any urgency.“Greg, can you sit up?”He sat up, secured his bare trunk in the blanket and took the teacup. He lifted it to his nose, smelt the liquid and frowned.“Take some sips.”Only a few young people enjoy herbal tea. But he needs it. It will aid his cold. “No.” He returned the cup to me, collected the tissue box I brought with the tea, took a few and sneezed.“You must.”“I…” He was interrupted by coughs
HIM ALL ALONG INCONCLUSIVENESS
NICHOLAS:“Vain!”The wind didn’t wash my gusts and pains. I arrived at Vain’s district as tempered as I had left the house.“Vain!”I braked violently at the gate of his disguised warehouse, bringing his men to shock and confusion.Yeah, they may not be familiar with my insane personality, but they should wait until I finish with their Boss, they will know I originated insanity!“Vain! You bastard!”I raged into the building and no one dared to hold me off. Perhaps, they still title and award me as Vain’s boy.“Bastards!” I cursed at them. They shouldn’t treat me that special and pertinent. I am their Boss’ doom. They should be afraid of me.“Fools!”My anger rocketed at the thought of Vain instructing his men to treat me as his fuvking egg anytime!“Vain!”Good. He has riled me to the beam. I will fist on and enjoy watching him bleed to death.“Where is he?!” I yelled at the moronic men. “Where is your fuvking Boss?”“Master Nico, Boss Vain is…”I rushed the useless man whose unfort
HIM ALL ALONG HEART BEATS TO BREAK
GREG: ‘Relax…’ The word invaded the fragile part of my heart, pierced and shattered it to pieces. He aimed to serialise my tensed body. Nicholas urged me to relax to mellow my density. Except it worsened it. Hearing the word brought me fear. I wasn’t afraid of Nicholas. I wasn’t sure what ignited the fear. I was merely taken back to the day of my abduction — the stranger taking my innocence, his whispers and making me feel pleasured most painfully. “I can have my gift another time,” Nicholas said. He was thoughtful to consider my sudden withdrawal, but I wanted him. I wanted to have him in me. I was prepared and consented to what he craves. “I want this.” “Me too, Sweedy. But you must take a rest.” “There is no better pill.” “Right,” he smiled. He found it funny. “Don’t smile." “You are tired.” I was not! Driving that distance and roaming in the storm did not affect me. And please! That was not about strength. “Nick…” “Lie still, I will make the fire.” I couldn’t get hi
HIM ALL ALONG A CALLED FOR
NICHOLAS:I’d assumed I wanted to stay away, shut my heart against them, believing nothing was left for us. But before me, as they stood, the wrongs of my decision surfaced in folds.Park and Wendy opened portals to emotions I spent days locking and avoiding. Their presence invoked the decision to quit roaming in self-deceit and restrain from becoming an island.I missed them.“Hi,” Wendy responded.I missed Wendy. I saw my unconscious self running to and hugging him, except my legs stood as rigid as always.“Do you guys want to come in?”I tried to be polite.“Do you expect we do?”But Park didn’t see it. I understand his bitterness and anger, and at the same time, his camouflaged interest to come in.I opened the door and walked into the house, leaving Wendy coming after me and Park on a spot, ruffling his black hair in retaliation.Wendy stopped halfway to the living room. He should. I left it overturned before riding to Vain. I thought smashing everything to the floor would lift m
HIM ALL ALONG RUNNING ASTRAY
NICHOLAS:“He enjoyed it like you did…”Chills flushed into my system as Park repeated Vain’s exact words. They kept seeing and saying the possibility of that. What if they are right? Would that make Greg comfortable with a shitty guy who r*ped him, and watched by his ex-boyfriend? Would he not think I did that to as many boys as possible?“You won’t know a thing by overthinking and hiding,” Wendy read my thoughts. “You have to speak to him.”“Either way, I will lose him. I have lost him.”Yeah, I should keep these words with me to avoid expectations and disappointment. I will speak to him, but I must prepare only to be grateful if he keeps the cops rather than expecting a reformation in our relationship.“You must trust in the love you both shared.” Park encouraged. “If not you, don’t ridicule Greg’s feelings.” I shouldn’t. For a move, I listened to Wendy and Park analyzing ways to approach Greg and make the confession; a home call, school call, phone call, texting, or dinner date.
HIM ALL ALONG I AM DONE FOR
NICHOLAS:Instinct? I told you all I suck at it and no one spared me the deal.Look at what it got me to do. To flirt and magnetize on Capell for my anger, and as if that wasn’t enough, I walked into the damn garden with him, on the outlook of Greg.I had everyone rooting for me. Out of the blue and by my stupid action, I turned them against me.“You are an asshole,” Wendy said.“You are better off in the mud and alone!” Park added.But I am not angry. I have disappointed them again, so I deserve every name-calling.I looked over to the part of the garden that stood Greg after Waldeen walked out on me, and he wasn’t there. He disappeared. And when I turned back, Park had gone too.“Fuvk!”I collapsed on the seat with no idea of what to do. I shouldn’t go to Wendy in his present temper. Park may not dare mold a fist against me but his lashes won’t be better either.I should go to Greg. I went for him. I hurried into his classroom but saw neither him nor the curly-haired friend. I was ab
HIM ALL ALONG A PAIN AND ACHE
GREG:I tried to look happy and at my best. I covered my pains and laughed aloud to avoid anyone pining on my sadness and turning against Nicholas.Stupid as it may seem, I held onto the tiniest hope that Nicholas would come around. He would wake up and say he didn’t mean to abandon me.It never happened. Nicholas didn’t call or text. He shut down his cell phone to keep me from reaching him as well, and it hurt as hell.It hurts unimaginably that every night I cry my balls out; and end up running out of the house at the early rise of the morning to school to avoid questions from the household.“I am here if you want to talk about anything.” Mr. Ben kept saying.I couldn’t avoid him. Mr. Ben met me groggy and flattened every morning. Although he saw it, he knows not to ask questions and I didn’t tell him either. I didn’t tell anyone Nicholas broke up with me. I could confide in Mr. Ben and he won’t tell anyone if I asked him not to, he is loyal and attentive to whatever I request of h
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