Chapter 05.6

“How did Jenny handle New Year’s Eve at your place?” I asked suddenly.

“She called me after midnight,” Paul said, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Said she wanted to come over, but quietly. I told her to meet me on the terrace so I could let her in. The moment she saw me, she started crying—don’t tell anyone that. I’d never seen her like that before. All she said was, and I quote,” he smiled, “Dad’s gone. Helen’s real.” I laughed.

“I hugged her, waited until she calmed down, then took her to her guest room—she usually uses that one,” he added. “Susy had already brought up snacks, cookies, ice cream—all the girly comfort food,” he chuckled. ”Then she took her over from me. When I told Brian and Mayoko what happened, Mayoko joined the girls. We had no idea what you’d done. Brian kept saying there was no way you were seeing someone else—he said it a lot, and Daniel and I tended to agree with him—but we just didn’t understand.”

“I was trying to win an argument,” I admitted. “Didn’t even think about who Helen was supposed to be. Dad explained it to me later. What happened after that?”

“Brian went to bed. The girls watched some sappy movie—something Jane would never normally do—and she just let everything out. All the pain from the past few years. They didn’t wake up until the afternoon. Susy gave them fresh clothes, and after lunch, Brian drove everyone home.”

“I really messed up,” I said quietly.

“Yeah, you did,” Paul admitted. ”Brian always stood up for you, but he didn’t understand why you never cleared things up.”

“When you picked her up after the breakup… did she cry?” I asked. 

“I wish she had,” Paul said. ”I know about your room at Amber’s shop—she told me about it a while ago. So when she messaged me, I knew something was wrong. I knew what she wanted to talk to you about that day, but I thought you’d choose long-distance, not break up with her. When she got in the car, all she said was—again, quoting—‘Jay decided he wants to look for someone new.’” He smiled, and I laughed.

“I said a lot of dumb things,” I muttered. He just nodded.

“She didn’t talk about you for a long time after that,” Paul said. “When you called her that night, I heard someone yelling, so I went over. We only close our doors when I have guests, so I heard everything. I thought it was funny, but she was furious. That’s when she started dating again.”

“What about the Helen thing?” I asked.

“Amber had you on speaker when you were bragging, and Jane walked in right then. She heard everything. Amber didn’t notice at first, and by the time she did, it was too late. Then you said the same thing to Brian, and Aaron made some comment about Helen. Jane just muttered in the kitchen, ‘I’m sure Helen’s Christmas dance is better than mine.’” He laughed. ”That’s the only time I’ve seen her jealous.”

“Yeah, Dad told me about that,” I said. ”I didn’t realize it on New Year’s Eve.”

“She also felt guilty about interfering in your relationship with that kiss,” Paul added with a laugh.

“She didn’t even let me kiss her,” I pointed out.

“I know,” Paul laughed. “But in her mind, even that was too much.”

“Still not really her territory,” I grinned.

“Definitely not,” he smiled.

“Do you know why she talked to me on New Year's Eve and was willing to come over to my house?” I asked.

“She said she was really hungry, and her clothes would ruin Amber's shop.”

I laughed, cutting Paul off. “I planted that thought in her head—to keep her from leaving me.”

“She also thought,” Paul continued, “that you wanted to clear things up with her. She didn’t believe you still loved her, but after seeing you at Tony’s, she also stopped believing Helen existed. She said you looked awful, like you had lost all your charm. She was curious about what you wanted from her, but instead of offering any real explanation, you simply confirmed Helen’s existence.

“I don’t know what I was thinking,” I said quietly. “After Mrs. Julie's wedding, did you talk to her about Helen? That she doesn't exist?”

“I tried,” Paul sighed. “But as soon as I mentioned your name or brought up anything related to this, she asked me to stop. She said that whatever you do is no longer her business.”

“I really messed up,” I murmured.

“Yeah, You did,” Paul admitted. “But if you go through with these transfer exams and get accepted, she’ll jump into your arms.” He smiled and picked up a sweater from his bed.

“I hope so,” I said, finishing getting dressed.