CHAPTER 5

Daisy's POV

My heart flipped “Huh？” I blink.

Was I dreaming?

"A camera?" My voice came out strangled. "Someone's been watching me for two weeks?" I asked with glassy eyes.

Killian pulled the SUV over to the side of the road. We were still ten minutes away from his apartment, but I was spiraling, and we both knew it.

"Look at me." His voice was firm but not unkind. "Daisy, look at me," he insisted.

I tried, but my vision was blurring. My chest felt too tight like someone was sitting on it.

"Breathe. In through your nostrils and out through your mouth."

I tried but failed’, I tried again.

"Fuck," he muttered. Then he unbuckled both our seatbelts and pulled me across the console into his lap.

I stiffened immediately. "What are you…?"

"Relax. I'm not trying anything." His arm wrapped around my waist, solid and warm. "You're having a panic attack. You need to ground yourself."

He placed my hand flat against his chest. I could feel his heartbeat steady, controlled, completely calm.

"Feel that? Match my breathing. Come on."

I focused on the rise and fall of his chest beneath my palm. Slowly so slowly my own breathing started to even out.

"That's it," he said quietly. "You're okay. You're safe."

"Someone was watching me." My voice broke. "In my bathroom. My bedroom. They saw everything."

His jaw tightened. "We don't know what they saw yet. Viktor's doing a full sweep."

But I knew. If there were cameras in my living room too, then they'd have seen me yesterday morning. They'd seen me at the window, desperate and alone, touching myself while listening to the man now holding me.

What if they decided to post？

The thought of humiliation was suffocating.

I am finished.

"I can't do this," I mutter, keeping my voice low "This is too much."

"Yes, you can. Because the alternative is letting whoever did this win." He tilted my chin up, forcing me to meet his eyes. "And you don't strike me as someone who loses easily."

I wanted to believe him. I wanted to feel as strong as he seemed to think I was. But, my nudes could be out there in some stranger's device.

Tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I write dirty books for a living," I said. "I'm not exactly equipped for real-life disaster"

"I will make sure I destroy all copies if there are any," he promised clenching a hand on my lap.

Something in his tone made me wonder what he'd survived to still be this calm. But before I could ask, he was already helping me back into my seat.

"We're almost there. Can you hold it together for ten more minutes?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice but I knew I could count on him.

He pulled back onto the road, and we drove in silence. I kept my hand pressed against my chest, still trying to match the rhythm of his breathing that I could somehow still feel.

When we finally pulled into an underground garage, I expected something flashy. Expensive sports cars and marble floors.

"Stay close," he said, grabbing my bags from the back.

I followed him to a private elevator that required both a keycard and a fingerprint scan.

"Is this really your apartment?" I asked as the doors closed. "It looks like a safe house."

"That's because it was. The FBI decommissioned it five years ago. I bought it." The elevator opened directly into his penthouse. "Welcome home."

I stepped in slowly, taking it all in. Floor-to-ceiling windows with a view of the city. Minimalist furniture. Everything is clean, efficient, and impersonal.

"It's so you," I said.

He turned to me, eyebrows raised. "Really？ What's that supposed to mean?"

"I can’t exactly explain. But, it looks like you."

He almost smiled. "Here is your bedroom. Please let me know if you need anything”

He started walking, "Killian, I called. “

"Yeah?"

"Thank you. For earlier. In the car. You didn't have to do that."

"It's my job."

"No. Your job is keeping me physically safe. Being kind was a choice."

…

(Thursday Morning )

Despite Killian's attempts to discourage me from attending an author’s book reading, I refused to listen. I needed a distraction from the recent drama in my life.

It was another author’s book reading in Brooklyn. I sat in the back, trying to stay invisible and avoid being in the spotlight.

The author talked about her writing process and when she was done, I raised my hand.

“How do you balance authenticity with fantasy in intimate scenes?”I asked.

She gave a vague answer about imagination and something like that which to me wasn't satisfying.

It was over.

As I woke up to leave, a blonde-haired woman approached me with a bright smile. “ You’re Daisy Macklin, right? I am Mandy. I’m such a huge fan of yours. I have always wondered how you make your scenes feel so real. like you are right there in the room, watching everyone.”

Oh! God,

Now I recognized her. The woman from Killian’s apartment that morning. The one who wrapped her hands around him that day.

“ The word “watching” hits like a physical blow. I swallowed, “It's called fiction, I just try to vividly imagine” I replied forcing a smile.

“Clearly,” she replied. Her eyes flicker past me. “Oh! There's my favorite distraction. I didn't know you were into literature now.”

Distraction？

I turned and looked where her gaze was directed.

Mandy walked past me and draped herself over Killian's arm, her fingers tracing the line of his jaw. Killian stiffened, but he didn't shove her off.

“Killian, baby. You've been ghosting me for days. Is this what you have been doing？ Chasing a writer?

My mouth dropped.

Believe me, I wasn’t jealous but then again…

Mandy's hands were on Killian’s chest. Possessive. Like she has done it a thousand times before.

And what if she has?.

My face burst into flames.

“Did Mandy follow us here? Or is she a fan of erotic fiction? I wondered.” I grit my teeth. This was stupid. I was stupid. Killian could sleep with whomever he wanted. It wasn’t my business. He was just my bodyguard. Nothing more.

But why did it hurt？ Watching another lady all over him like that？

I wanted to disappear into space

To yelled at her

Or maybe both

But someone might be watching, cameras might start clicking and I had an image to uphold. So, I turned on my heels and excused myself. I could hear Killian calling from behind. But I didn’t stop, I kept walking.

“Daisy, wait.”

By the time he caught up with me, he gripped my arm and spun me around against him. He looked frustrated, his tie loosened, his professional mask cracked.

“Go back inside, Killian! Mandy's waiting and I'm sure she has plenty of ‘distractions’' planned,“ I snapped, setting my arm free.

“She’s my ex, Daisy “

Right.

“ I don't care, but don't invite your exes to my workplace. ” I waved for a taxi. None stopped.

He chucked “Is that what this is? Professionalism？”

Of course not

Then he took two steps closer.

We were inches away from each other now and I could feel his warm breath against my skin.“ Because your eyes are saying you hate seeing her hands on me as much as I do”

I looked away, “ You don’t owe me an explanation.”

Lies.

“I might not owe you an explanation but I am giving you one anyway.” His dark eyes held mine. “Because I can't stand the thought of you looking at me the way you just did. With so much despite.”

Then there was silence.

“Why do you even care what I think?” I forced the words out.

He let out a little laughter, “Because you're the job I should have turned down. The client who's ruining my focus. The one woman I ...”

His phone buzzed. Then mine.

We both looked down at the same time.

Unknown: Cute couples. But she’s already taken. Tell him to back off, Daisy. Or I’ll make him.