Tonight, I smiled to myself in the corner of my room. A smile that either feels sad or happy. I remember that day when Hilda and I decided to look for work in Jakarta. It took only a few hours for the five of us to finalize a plan to find work with Alan, Deo and Wahyu. Ruru nugraha has forbidden me to go with them, yes my dear friend he told me.
"Why don't you go to Jakarta, if it's still possible, there may be life there but it's not as complicated as here.""Yeah I have to give Alan a chance.""Alan wanted to leave because his heart was still dark, still confused between the two options.""Yes Ru, I understand, but what's wrong if I try to believe.""Yes, it's up to Sin, I can't hold you back, you are still blinded by love, it's just sad that I see everything you will do is in vain."“Ru, pray.”"Yeah, if you want to hear me stay here, I can't help and protect you anymore, if you go Sintia."Maybe, could Ruru really love me? But he's not working yet? But heFor almost a year I was alone and only focused on work, all the men who approached I only considered friends, there were no more feelings than that. Honestly now I'm more sensitive to judge men. If they are just for fun, just playing around, just experimenting, I'm also the same as just getting to know them. My heart and feelings are expensive enough to just play around now. Yes, I just want to find a partner who is sure, who is well-established, who has a job and is ready to support Queeniera and I in the future.When calling my daughter often what is asked is the figure of daddy. Yes, at the age of only 3 years, between knowing and maybe forgetting the father figure that is remembered in his brain memory."Mom buy a new Daddy please." Or, "It's good, Aziz is always sent to school with Daddy and Queeniera's mother when Mom."All the words that Queeniera asked and said, sometimes I can only cry and scream in my heart without replying to those words. Especially if I'm going
Jakarta - Bekasi, the distance that is quite time-consuming for me to make love with Dwi, is enough for me to know my future priest, and maybe it's time for me to bring him back to Lampung. Yes Dwi I will introduce mom, daddy and my girl. Hopefully, I hope this time my choice is right. And hopefully this is the mate that God really sent for me, not just a test or just playing around.The Eid holiday arrived, we went to Lampung, I introduced Dwi to my mom, dad and gilr. Alhamdulillah they accepted our good intention to get married. We spent about three days on vacation and Eid in Lampung. We spent time getting to know each other and of course bringing Dwi closer to my two children and my parents.Alhamdulillah, Dwi is an easy going person and loves small children very much, we went to the beach, to the mall and played in the playground with Queeniera. Enough to be a good start for us, especially my son. Finally Queeniera got what she wanted, the warm embrace of a father figure
The first year of marriage definitely needs adjustment, the house is still empty, and the standard form of the developer must be renovated, I still have to work to help the family economy, and I still have many dreams with Dwi, still want to spend our honeymoon, want to renovate the house and fill the house with beautiful furniture. Of course I have to continue working as usual, I still leave my child in Lampung. I have to give more time to my husband, slowly changing habits and circumstances so that everyone is not surprised by this change. In fact, I still have to stay in Jakarta and work in Jakarta the same as before.Every weekend we always spend together, through the good times and my honeymoon. Recreation to Puncak, Bandung or even to Garut. One by one we visited tourist destinations. After a few months of marriage, it turns out that we have the same hobbies such as listening to music, traveling and not forgetting to capture vacation moments by taking selfies. Many of my fa
Two husbands who are good to me, at the same time he is also a loving and responsible father. But sometimes he is a little chatty and fussy with us. Everything was done out of love and concern for us. Even though we live simply, our inner and outer life is very well filled and he always gives full happiness. No need to live with lots of wealth, just live a simple life, but be happy and be able to gather with my children and parents in one more house.After giving birth to my third child, I expressed my intention to mom and daddy, to take the two sons and daughters that we had left. It's really wrong, on the one hand my parents will be sad and lonely without grandchildren with a considerable distance, but on the one hand I'm the one who always remembers my children in Lampung. Since I didn't work and became pregnant again, it's rare for us to go back to Lampung, especially now that we want to bring Grandfather Farrell, who is still young, often impossible.Mom, dad forbade what
35 years, my mother adopted me, took care of me, gave me all the love, affection, attention and wealth they had. Mom to me, the best and greatest mother, as well as my stepfather even though he is often evil but still loves me. Lately they have been sick a lot, almost 68 years of their age. That's what makes me often sad and anxious, I'm afraid they're sick away from me.More than 3 times a day I video call them a day, even though I am old but still very spoiled to my mom and daddy, for them I am still a spoiled mom's child. I can cry incessantly if I don't hear from them for two days. Mom and dad are still in Palembang, they have been there for a month. Occupying a very simple house and we rarely live in with all the facilities that are a little less supportive. I'm getting worried, they are used to living in a spacious and comfortable house with all the facilities. But yes, for reasons of responsibility and laziness if you have to go back and forth to Lampung to take care of ou
After the death of mom and dad, it can be said that the life I live is quite heavy. After returning from Lampung, I didn't have much personal belongings that I could bring back to Bekasi. You could say it's only limited to children's clothes. In fact, how many things I can use in Bekasi if we can move them.Arriving in Lampung yesterday I was shocked by the behavior of my uncles and aunts. The first bad news I heard was that on the day my mother died, the brothers and sisters did not have any feelings of sadness or sympathy, as in our area, if someone dies, we will hold a recitation or mourn for a few days. It's different with them, they even discuss about my mother's inheritance and inheritance.Yes, it may be said that in fact I was only an adopted child, but I was adopted since birth. Or if they don't respect their brother-in-law who is my stepfather, let alone want to help take care of him who is paralyzed, they don't care a little, and my daddy has to leave the house and
I, never got used to all this. "O Allah if I may cry and complain." The sadness of losing my mother still continues to whip in my heart, not to mention about the family who continues to terrorize me to sell the inherited house. I was shocked by God, shocked by all this happening that seemed too fast for me.I used to only take care of one baby, suddenly I had to take care of my three children. And their age can be said not too far away. Queeniera is still 7 years old, Dimas is still 4 years old and Farrell is just 1 year old. Can you imagine how busy I am at home.The effects of the pandemic must be felt, both in the financial and economic fields of our family. If in fact and in the current situation, I should be helping my husband to work and earn his fortune again. But all that is not possible right? Honestly, we should have had a housemaid, who just helped me take care of the household needs, but again it wasn't possible, and where could I pay for it. To take care of our ch
My Whatshapp message keeps ringing. Sometimes from my brothers, or from them my uncles and aunts. My head feels like it's going to explode especially if it wasn't for the thought of that heritage house. Yes, I have started to soften my heart, trying to be sincere if my inherited house is sold, some of the assets will be transferred and some I will give to my family and relatives.However, almost a year went on in the process of offering the house to the buyer, which was not what I wanted. The effects of Covid have weakened the economy, and of course it will also affect the assets that I offer, many and there are several families who want to buy them, only at prices that can still be said to be low and very cheap from the market price. Too bad it's not, if I have to sell it in a hurry.They, my relatives didn't seem to care, they kept pressuring me to sell it immediately. In the morning, Uncle A called me, Aunt B contacted me in the afternoon, and at night, Uncle C called me. W