CHAPTER 15: UNSETTLED

✦ 𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓 ✦

I woke up the next morning still replaying everything from the blackout.

No matter how much I tried to ignore it, my brain kept going back to the same four things: Xavier catching me in the dark, his heartbeat hammering against my hand, him punching a hole in the drywall upstairs, and then acting like a totally normal human being the next morning.

I pulled my pillow over my face and let out a sigh.

*Maybe he’s just weird,* I thought, trying to laugh it off. *Maybe he just has issues and no sense of personal space.*

But then the second thought hit me right away: *Why am I even still thinking about this?*

Annoyed with myself, I kicked off the covers, got out of bed, and started getting ready for class.

By ten in the morning, I was sitting in the middle row of my finance lecture, watching the professor pull up our assignment schedule on the screen.

"Alright, everyone," the professor said, stepping out from behind his podium. "Project work officially starts this week. Make sure you and your assigned partner sit down, figure out your outline, and split up the responsibilities early."

Once the lecture ended, Adrian and I grabbed a table outside near the campus quad to organize everything.

"Okay, so here's what I was thinking," Adrian said, spreading out two printed sheets of paper between us. "We have five main parts to turn in. I can handle the corporate background and the tax analysis if you want to take the data modeling and the final summary."

"Wait, really?" I looked up at him. "You actually want to do the tax section?"

Adrian laughed, leaning back against the wooden bench. "Yeah, honestly. My dad's an accountant, so I’ve been hearing about tax codes since I was ten. It’s pretty straightforward for me."

"You're a lifesaver," I said, marking down my sections with a highlighter. "Most people usually try to dump all the heavy math on their partner."

"Not my style," he smiled, gathering his papers together into a neat stack and sliding them into his folder. "I'd rather we just knock it out early so we aren't pulling an all-nighter the day before it's due."

Working with Adrian was completely effortless. He was sharp, easy to talk to, and didn't make anything complicated.

Adrian zipped up his backpack, slinging one strap over his shoulder as he stood up from the picnic table. "Alright, I’ve got a lab across campus in ten minutes. I'll type up my draft for section one tonight and send it over."

"Sounds good," I smiled, waving as he backed away. "Thanks again for taking the tax part!"

"Don't mention it! See you Thursday!" he called back before heading down the paved walkway.

I leaned back against the bench, taking a breath and enjoying the warm afternoon air. For the first time in weeks, sitting under the trees with my notebook open, I wasn't thinking about my house, my stepfamily, or anything heavy. I was just focused on school.

"Earth to Julian."

A hand waved in front of my eyes, cutting off my thought. I blinked and looked up to see Leo standing by the side of the table, holding two cup holders with iced coffees.

"Sorry," I said, pulling my laptop closer to make room for him. "I was just organizing my notes."

"Clearly," Leo said, sliding onto the bench across from me where Adrian had been sitting a minute ago. He pushed one of the coffee cups my way. "You've been zoning out since this morning. Don't tell me finance finally broke your brain."

"Very funny," I said, taking a sip of the cold drink. "No, I'm fine. Just trying to make sure I understand this outline."

"Right," Leo smirked, taking a drink of his own coffee. "You're usually way more present than this. You look like you're carrying the weight of the world today."

"I'm literally just reading case studies, Leo."

"If you say so," he chuckled. "Just don't pass out on me before lunch."

I laughed and shook my head, turning back to my notebook. But inside, I felt a quick flash of frustration. Leo was right—I *was* distracted. The second my mind had a free second to wander, it went straight back to Xavier standing over my phone in the dark last night.

*It's so stupid,* I thought to myself. *I'm literally on campus right now. Why can't I just keep him out of my head?*

By three in the afternoon, class was done for the day. I packed my notebooks into my bag and said goodbye to Leo by the library steps. My plan was simple: walk down to the main road, get on the city bus, and ride it home.

But as I reached the campus gates, I spotted a familiar car sitting by the curb.

Xavier’s black SUV was parked in the loading zone, idling quietly.

I stopped in my tracks, surprised. I walked over, pulled the heavy passenger door open, and looked inside. Xavier was sitting in the driver's seat, wearing a dark button-down shirt with his sleeves rolled up to his forearms.

"I thought you were working late at the office today," I said, getting in and pulling the door shut.

"Finished early," he said simply.

He didn't explain anything else. I pulled my seatbelt across my chest and set my backpack on the floorboards as he pulled out into traffic.

The drive home was quiet. It wasn't awkward or tense, just plain quiet.

"How was your day?" I asked, looking out the side window as we stopped at a red light.

"Fine," Xavier replied, his eyes fixed on the road ahead. "Long meetings."

"Yeah, mine was pretty good," I said, leaning back into the seat. "Adrian and I actually got a lot done after class. We split up the whole project already."

"Mm," Xavier made a low sound in his throat.

"He's actually making the whole thing super easy," I continued, turning to look at him. "He offered to do the corporate tax section all on his own because his dad is an accountant. He brought this whole printed checklist with him today." I let out a light laugh. "He told me he refuses to let us stress out over finance."

For a split second, the car felt like it jerked slightly.

I glanced over at Xavier’s hands on the steering wheel. His knuckles were locked tight, his skin pale against the dark leather from how hard he was gripping it.

I frowned, looking at his face. "Everything okay?"

The moment I asked, Xavier’s grip immediately relaxed. His hands loosened on the wheel, and he rested his arm back on the door frame like nothing had happened.

"Yeah," he said smoothly. "Just traffic."

"Okay," I murmured, turning back to the window.

I let it go, but something about the way he reacted felt strange.

When we got home, I carried my heavy bag upstairs to my room, tossed my jacket on the bed, and went straight into the bathroom to take a shower.

Twenty minutes later, dressed in a clean hoodie and sweatpants with a towel over my damp hair, I walked back over to my desk to grab my notes.

I stopped short.

My laptop was sitting neatly in the middle of my desk. The white charging cord was plugged into the side port, and the little light on the side was glowing green to show it was fully charged.

I stared at it for several seconds.

Someone had taken it out of my bag. Plugged it in. Made sure it would be ready before I needed it.

A strange warmth settled quietly in my chest before I could stop it.

I walked out into the hallway, leaning over the wooden railing. "Mom?" I called down.

"Yes, honey?" her voice came from the kitchen downstairs.

"Thanks for plugging my laptop in!"

"Oh, that wasn't me, sweetie!" she called back over the sound of dishes. "I've been down here making dinner since three!"

I stood there on the landing, my smile fading. My eyes slowly moved down the hallway toward the closed door of Xavier's study at the end of the hall.

An hour later, the four of us were sitting around the dining table for dinner.

Richard was in a good mood, talking about a business proposal he had signed earlier in the afternoon while passing the salad bowl down.

"How are classes going, Julian?" Richard asked, looking across the table at me. "Getting along with your project partner?"

"Yeah, actually," I said, taking a bite of my food. "Adrian's great. He really pulls his weight, so it's not stressful at all."

"Good," Richard nodded, cutting his steak. "It's always easier when your partner actually pulls their weight instead of leaving you with all the work."

I laughed a little. "Yeah... I got lucky."

Across the table, the sound of silverware against porcelain stopped completely.

Xavier quietly set his fork down on the edge of his plate. He didn't drop it or slam it, but he put it down with a very specific kind of care.

Neither my mom nor Richard paid any attention to it, but sitting right across from him, I noticed immediately. He just sat there, looking down at his plate with his jaw tight.

"You're done already?" I asked him. He had barely eaten three bites.

Xavier didn't look up at me. "I'm not hungry."

His eyes flicked toward me for the briefest second before he walked away.

I watched him walk away down the hall, holding my fork in mid-air. Something about how he just dropped everything and left didn't sit right with me.

By midnight, the rest of the house was completely dark and quiet.

I couldn't sleep, so I walked downstairs in my socks to grab a glass of water from the kitchen. As I walked down the main hallway, I noticed a strip of light shining onto the floorboards from one of the rooms.

The door to Xavier's study was open just an inch or two.

I paused, holding my glass. I stepped closer and looked through the crack.

Xavier was asleep at his desk, leaning back in his chair with his head tilted slightly to the side. His laptop was still open, lighting up a bunch of spreadsheets and documents scattered across the wood. He looked exhausted.

I stood there for a second, knowing I should just walk away and head to the kitchen.

Instead, I pushed the door open quietly and walked in.

The thick blanket was hanging over the back of his desk chair. I picked it up as carefully as I could, stepped up to the desk, and draped it over his shoulders so he wouldn't freeze.

I made sure not to bump the desk, turning around right away to slip back out into the hallway.

Before I could take a step, a hand reached out and grabbed my wrist.

I froze, my breath catching in my throat.

Xavier’s grip on my wrist was firm and warm, stopping me right where I stood. His thumb rested against the inside of my wrist, right over my pulse, as though his sleeping body had reached for the only thing it knew.

I didn't move an inch, looking down at him in the quiet room.

His eyes were still closed. His chest was moving in slow, heavy breaths. He was completely asleep—grabbing me was just an automatic reaction.

For a few seconds, neither of us moved. My heart started beating fast, right where his thumb pressed into my skin.

Then, just as quickly as he grabbed me, his hand loosened. His fingers slipped off my wrist, and his arm dropped back onto the armrest as he let out a soft breath.

I pulled back and quietly walked out of the study, shutting the door behind me until I heard the latch click.

I stood in the dark hallway for a moment, looking down at my arm. My pulse was still racing, and my skin felt warm where he had touched me.

I frowned, staring at my hand in the dim light.

*...Why does everything he does stay with me?*

I stood there waiting for a reason, but none came........