Episode 3. A Husband Who Is Full Of Regret

Devon's Deep Thoughts:

I lay in bed alone, feeling pathetic and regretful for a second night. My first thought lately when my head hit the pillow every night was always the same. A few swallows and deep breaths held back my tears. For years, women have been chasing me. Not to mention all the pretty wealthy girls my parents have tried to hook me up with. I flat-out refused. Why? Because I was waiting for the one who could turn my soul inside out and make me feel like a new man. Then I found her, and now I've let her get away.

I caress the silken sheets my wife loves so much. I'm enticed by her sweet sexy scent embedded in them. Her perfume clings to my pillow. My wife's warm and naked body would be close to mind. The scent of her shampoo, I would recognize that scent anywhere. The sweet smell of my woman is submerged in my brain. My body responds predictably to her nakedness; I am ready to claim her when I awaken to her nearness.

All the warm and cozy feelings remain here to remind me that she is gone. The only problem is that I can't sleep without her in my arms. The wife I love beyond reason, to the point of blindness to my faults that ended us, is long gone. With this jarring realization, I am mentally fully awake, only to find my situation had gone from what I thought was terrible to alarming. Surely Zari will divorce me, leaving memories that will torture me forever.

Late into the night, still tossing and turning in bed—uncomfortable staring at the ceiling, thinking and missing my wife. I just knew I had my wife wrapped around my finger, and no matter what I did, she wouldn't leave me. Boy, jealousy is rottenness to the bone! Oh, how I wish I could take back what I had done. The party was sincerely meant to welcome my wife back from the hospital. But unfortunately, I made a mistake when I met Mike and the guys at the club just a few days before the party, and that conversation got into my head. A memory flashed in my mind from a few nights ago.

{The mistake I made the night before the party.}

"Hey, I'm glad you are here, Devon. The fellows said, sitting at the table drinking. It was the place we normally meet at the club on Friday nights. Mike tells me. "I want to ask you something. I know how much you want to be with Susie. And I know you will be getting that divorce you have desired."

"Who told you that?" I asked Mike surprised to hear him say that. 

"Man, you must be out of your mind talking about divorcing that beautiful woman you got!" Pete exclaimed.

"Susie told us. The girl is telling everybody that. Look, as your friend and man to man. I wanted to know how you feel about Zari and me dating after you get your divorce and get with Susie?"

My eyes formed into narrow slits, and I became furious. "Jeez, Man! Where is your respect? Zari is my wife! And no! You can't date my wife!" 

"Man, you got to earn respect around here to get it. Right guys?" Mike asks the men. 

"Yeah, man, any man in his right mind would love to have Zari as their woman," John says, taking another swig from his beer bottle.

 Do you call that respecting Zari, flaunting Susie all over town? Better yet, do you respect yourself?" Mike pointedly asked.

"Man, shut up! And keep my wife's name out of your mouth!" 

"Devon, learn to appreciate your wife. You have a good woman because If I had Zari, I would know how to treat her!" 

"Forget you, Mike!" I left the club feeling guilty, knowing my best friend was right. But I was too jealous over that dance Mike had with Zari. How could she let another man touch her? That sent me into a jealous rage and made me do a stupid thing, wanting revenge.

The sun shone on Zari, but was I too blind to see how she smiled at me? Had I taken her for granted, as she said? Or was it because of my issues and pride? But after last night, I'm unsure if she is in love with me. She was so angry, and I was just trying to teach her a lesson. She must know I don't want a divorce. I even told her I didn't, but she left me anyway. It just doesn't make any sense.

Susie would have never left me that way. No matter what I do, she is the only person I know who stands by me. I thought Zari loved me much more than Susie did. After only being with me for eight days, she said yes to my marriage proposal! I thought she was really into me. But was it the romantic atmosphere she got caught up in? It must have been from what I saw last month, her laughing and having a good time with Michael. Why did I get so upset? Why was I so jealous?

Because she is my sweet, adorable, sexy, and elegant wife, I never thought I would love or want her as I do, but now I know l could never let Michael have her. These past two years, I admit I lost my way. The only person I ever thought about protecting was Susie. But now I want and need to guard what's mind. I'm sorry, Michael, I can't let you have Zari. People say if you love someone, you will let them go and be happy. But there's a saying that if that person loves you, they will return to you and be yours forever.

So, if I let her go, maybe my wife will return to me, and we can be in love forever?

But I just hope I haven't pushed Zari emotionally so hard. That I've driven my wife into the arms of another man. I lay here reflecting on my awful behavior two nights ago, and now I recognize I took things too far. Zari didn't deserve that. I'm still haunted by how her dark eyes darted left and right, looking like she'd rather disappear than be seen with me. Even though she said, her dance with Michael was innocent. We both did wrong. But I will be the bigger person and apologize first. While I chewed on my nail, trying to figure out what to say. The old-fashioned way is best just to say I'm sorry. First thing in the morning, that's what I will do. Get down on my knees, ask my wife for forgiveness, and come home so we can start over. 

The Knock at the door:

I heard the doorbell ring first, and then a booming knock came on the door. "Alright, alright!" Who in the world could that be at 3 am? Could it be my wife? I quickly grabbed my robe so I could answer the door.

"Who is it?"

"Is this the Hightower residence?" 

Before opening the door, I replied, "Yes, I'm Mr. Hightower. I said, looking at the video camera by the door and seeing two police officers." 

"Mr. Hightower, my name is Officer Douglass. Can we speak to you, sir?"

I had no idea why they would want to talk to me. But I tied my robe up and opened the door. 

"Sorry for disturbing you this morning, Sir," he said, showing me his badge.

"It's okay. How can I help you?" 

"Can we come in, Mr. Hightower? It will only take a second." 

"Sure, have a seat," I said as I sat on the other side of the coffee table on the sofa facing them.

"We have some disturbing news," the officer started. The sound of his tone and the look on his face began to unhinge me. 

"Sir, there was a car accident two nights ago, and we have just found out it was Mrs. Hightower. The car crash took place on Highway 1 around 3 am. Saturday night. It was a head-on collision."

"Zari?! My wife, Zari, in a head-on collision? Oh, dear God, no! Is she okay, is she hurt?

Devon dared to asks is she's still alive, he was to afraid of their answer.