I waited in anticipation at the diner like Colton instructed me to. He was already ten minutes late, and the cold breeze was becoming too much for me. With a frown, I decided to wait inside for him, since punishing myself seemed irrelevant.
I greeted Lukas, the owner, with a huge smile as I waltzed in. He had a big fatherly round belly in front of him that made him seem like a human pillow. He was always nice to me, and since he knew I volunteered at the senior citizen's home where his uncle was at, he would sometimes give me free brownies or muffins with whatever I ordered.
"Hello Lukas. How are you this evening?" I greeted once I was close enough.
"Oh I'm quite great, mate. About to close up in thirty minutes. Did you need anything?" I frowned slightly at that. It was only around 6:30 in the evening, but I didn't question why he was closing up shop early.
"Actually, I'll just take two doughnuts please." I smiled brightly as he shot me a knowing look. Every diner, pastry shop or restaurant in London knew Colton and I main order. It was sort of our thing.
I collected my chocolate covered donut, holding it between my teeth as I retrieved Colton's plain doughnut and my change. I shuffled to a booth by the glass window, so that I could see when he arrived.
The sun was setting, lighting the sky with its beaming splashes of red, pink and orange. I loved to ogle it so much, and I found myself taking multiple pictures with my phone, whilst still holding the doughnut between my teeth. Before I knew it, half of my chocolate covered treat disappeared, and I quickly wrapped it in my napkin, not wanting to spoil tradition. But he couldn't be upset. He's the one who's late anyways.
I snapped quite a few lovely pictures, setting one as my screensaver before quickly sharing it with Shanae. I knew how much she liked things of nature. And though a few building heads were peaking, it was still very much natural.
I was so invested in the pictures, that I didn't even realize that the bell at the door went off, indicating that someone had entered.
"Paris!" The voice of my best friend drew me to his gaze, and I smiled widely until I spotted a certain blonde beside him.
"Anastasia"
"Paris" We both said in unison, seeing that we both seemed surprised to see the other. We both then looked to Colton, who was smiling innocently as if he didn't notice the tension.
"Colton I thought we-" I stopped immediately when I noticed that Anastasia and I were speaking the same thing. I threw daggers at him with my eyes, and he just seemed to have noticed the tension.
He looked about for a while before his eyes landed on my half eaten doughnut and his still sitting there.
"Great you got doughnuts" He beamed, but the blonde's frown only grew as she eyed them too.
"And none for me I see" She laughed awkwardly, trying to hide her emotions.
"That's okay babe. I'll go get you one"
"Babe?" I mimicked out loud without realizing, and even her seemed shocked, but it quickly transformed into pride as her eyes glistened in happiness.
"Okay" She mumbled, sitting across from me as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.
I nibbled on the other half of my snack, since the specialness and sentiment was now stripped from 'our thing'. I avoided eye contact at all cost with her. I wasn't trying to be rude, but I couldn't help the gnawing at my heart as the word repeated over and over in my mind. Babe.
He called her babe!
He only ever called me babe.
Colton was never a guy to rush into things, and even though Anastasia was literally a model, it would take months before he decides to initiate anything, even though he asked me last night if I was okay with it. I still knew he only asked just to be clear if he should let himself fall.
I mean, that's what happened all the other times he pursued a female. Though maybe they all just excused themselves after being uncomfortable with how close we were, as Shanae suggested.
A wicked smile tugged at my lips as I thought about how Anastasia is no different. It was quite selfish of me to want to scare her away, but if I did it all those other times when I wasn't even trying, imagine if I tried?
I bit my lips to contain a smile as he returned with her doughnut. My heart sunk when he quickly pecked her cheek as he handed it to her, but I quickly composed myself.
"Um Col? I ate all of my doughnut." I batted my eyelashes with a pout that I knew did wonders on his heart. "Can you get me one for the road please?"
"Sure" He beamed, completely oblivious to my real intentions. "Anything else?"
I shrugged. "And our favourite" I sucked my bottom lip between my teeth again, holding back my smirk at how well I did that. Anastasia seemed uncomfortable, and I almost felt bad for being a bitch. Almost.
"You guys are really close huh?" She asked after a while of silence, and I causally shrugged.
"Yea. We've been mates for years. We're practically inseparable." She tensed at this, and I could already see my plan working.
She twisted the napkin between her fingers as we sat in silence. I couldn't tell what was going through her mind. I knew it was unfair of me to be doing this, but I have known Colton for years. I never intended to fall for him, but what can I do?
Maybe, just maybe, he feels the same way too but he just doesn't know it yet. Maybe there is actually a chance for us, but Anastasia is distracting him from his true feelings. I'm sure of it.
Colton returned with my doughnut and three blueberry smoothies. I didn't feel annoyed that he got one for her too. Who wouldn't? It was solely polite.
"Okay one chocolate covered doughnut and a blueberry smoothie for you" He spoke as he handed me my food."And one for mah-lady" I frowned at that but then I realised that Anastasia's face looked the same as mine.
"Um, Colton. I-I don't like blueberries" She voiced her concerns, and I quickly pulled my straw between my lips to hide my simper as she looked between the two of us holding the smoothies.
"Oh I'm sorry. I can get you something else if you want?"
"No" She quickly protested, standing up. "I think I'll just go"
Yes.
"No" He held onto her before she could leave, and I could see the tears behind her eyes.
My heart suddenly fell when I realized how childish, selfish and mean I was being. I purposely hurt her just because he chose her and not me. I sighed as my throat suddenly felt dry. I knew I was being unreasonable, but can I hide what my heart truly felt?
I sighed again as I listened to their bickering. " Anastasia, don't go" I said out loud, stopping both of them. "Let's all go have fun. It'll give us a chance to know each other more. You know, since you'll probably be around a while" I offered her a genuine smile as I blinked back my own tears.
My heart protested completely to what my mouth said, but my mind tried to remind it to be rational, fair and realistic.
Once Colton and I are alone and I am very much sober, I'll be a big girl and tell him my true feelings. I'll do it soon too, before he takes things too far with Anastasia, which might leave him in a sticky situation.
If he felt the same way, then great. But if he didn't, I'd just have to accept that and actually not try and scare off any girl that comes into his life. It'll be awkward for a while, but we'll bounce back.
Colton would do literally anything for me, so I had to keep his best interest at heart instead of mine. He deserved that much.
"Really?" She asked. "Are you sure?" Her voice was small, but I could see a smile pulling on her plump lips.
"I'm sure. If I made you feel uncomfortable, I'm sorry. That wasn't my intention" I half lied. It was my intention to make her uncomfortable, but I really was sorry.
Her smile only grew as her eyes lit up, and I could see that she really liked Colton. I mean who wouldn't?
"I'll order whatever drink I'll like and meet you guys at the car then" She suggested excitedly as we headed outside. I nodded slightly as Colton handed her five pounds.
The sun was completely gone by the time we went outside, and the cool breeze tickled my arms, making me shiver a little.
I felt warm fabric being wrapped around my body, and I quickly looked up to see Colton fixing his jacket around my shoulders. I felt bad, knowing I should've brought my own, but he didn't seem to mind the harsh breeze one bit as he beamed down at me.
My eyes quickly darted inside, seeing Anastasia in deep conversation with Lukas. Knowing Lukas and his conversationalist self, she wouldn't be done for another five minutes. I thought it was a perfect opportunity to tell Colton, but he spoke before me.
"Thank you for what you did back there, Paris. Anastasia has alway felt threatened by you, and that really helped" He said, making my heart sink a bit.
"Why would she feel threatened by me? " I laughed awkwardly as if I didn't know. "We're just friends right?"
"I don't know if you've noticed.." He trailed as he leant closer to my ear. "But we're pretty close" He whispered, causing me to laugh at his playful nature.
"Oh I didn't notice at all" I joked along, but my insides felt crushed at the whole conversation. He pulled me to his chest in a hug as our laughter died down, and I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out how wonderful it felt to be like this with him.
"I don't know what the future holds for us, but I'm glad you'll be with me. I don't want that to ever change " He mumbled in my hair, and a single tear rolled down my cheek.
I quickly got rid of it as Anastasia emerged from the small diner. She smiled brightly at us as she approached, and Colton openly welcomed her as he swung his arm over her shoulder. And I knew, just knew, that I couldn't tell him.
At least not tonight.
Closing Song: I Guess I'm In Love By Clinton Kane *** I pulled away gently to look up at him, and he was already gazing down at me. "Hi, Beautiful," he greeted softly, causing my smile to grow wider. "Hi, Handsome," I returned just as sweet. "Happy birthday." He chuckled with a slight shake of his head. "For the umpteenth time today, thank you." I rolled my eyes at his teasing tone. Okay, maybe I overdid it a little bit. "I know, I know," I defended. "But it is the first time that I get to tell you while doing this…." I pulled on his bottom lip with my teeth, automatically giving me access to initiate a kiss. I moved my lips against his in a rhythmic caress, keeping my body pressed flush against his. "Happy birthday," I whispered as I pulled away, but he quickly reclaimed my lips, showing that he wasn't quite ready for our kiss to end just yet. "
*Four Months Later* Being at the end can be sad, but it also can be a good thing. The end, in some aspects, means the beginning of something new. The end of a good meal most times leads to a great dessert. The end of a good movie typically gives a chance to start a new one. As for me, the end of high school opens the door for new opportunities in life. It was a sad moment in some sense. Seven years of high school has been a journey. The nostalgia was almost overwhelming, but it was all worth it. I had good times and bad times. I had tons of fun and shed a lot of tears too. But high school was where I met some of the most important people in my life, and so it will forever be one of my favourite places. University was a big step from high school, but I suppose I was somewhat ready. The months of getting acceptance letters were terribly nerve-wracking. However, it wasn't too bad, because my friends and I wouldn't
For a while, I was frozen in my spot. My dad was… hugging me? His shoulder shook once, and I slowly raised my arms to wrap around his back as sudden remorse swamped my nerves.This wasn’t only hard for Cynthia and me. It must’ve been hell for him too. To call a woman who was in love with another man your wife for two years, sharing a bed that had no comfort and still had to be strong for his kids, couldn’t have been easy.Of course, there were a zillion things they both could’ve done differently, but just like Fabian and that girl who died, some things just happen to slip away right before your eyes.We are mere humans, after all.“I’m so sorry, Paris,” he sobbed as he slid down to his knees before me, keeping his head buried in my stomach. My tears fell involuntarily as I watched the strongest man I know break in front of me. “I failed you. I failed my daughters.”Cynthia ran towards us
I stood outside my house in a nervous mess. I tried to move forward, but my feet wouldn’t go.It was almost one in the afternoon by the time Fabian dropped me off, and I looked back for the umpteenth time to ensure that he was still there. Just like every time I checked, he was sitting in the car under the neighbour’s tree, staring at me. “You can do this, Paris,” I mumbled, trying to give myself a push. Still, I felt stuck. With a deep breath, I grabbed my phone and dialled Cynthia’s number. She picked up on the third ring. “Paris? Where are you?” she asked, sounding distressed. I sighed. “I’m outside. Can you—um—can you meet me by the porch?” “Sure. I’m on my way.” On a typical day, she would’ve made fun of me for being a baby. But she, more than anyone, understood the intensity of the situation and our feelings. As she appeared in front of me, I felt my guilt resurface full folds. Her eyes were red and puffy, and the
Colton.My eyes darted between the two boys. They didn't appear as sudden best friends—far from it, actually. But they both looked at me with a similar light in their eyes. They cared for me, and I assumed that was the only reason they were in the same place again.My eyes lingered on Fabian for a while, silently asking him if he did this. As far as I knew, Colton didn't have this address. However, all he did was shoot me a wink before leaving the room.My gaze settled on Colton as he reluctantly crossed the room, and I straightened my back as I rested the remainder of food on the nightstand."H-hi," he said with a short wave. I cleared my throat as I returned the gesture."When you said you wanted to hang out today, this isn't what I thought you meant," I said, attempting to initiate conversation. The last time we spoke was in Guidance class, and it wasn't even a straightforward conversation.Why did Fabian bring him here? I wasn't up
Song For Chapter:Shallow by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper***I wrapped the blanket tighter around my shoulders as I struggled to find sleep. I had been in bed for the past hour, yet rest would not relieve me.Maybe it was the fact that my life had just been turned upside down or that Fabian had been gone for that entire hour, knowing how upset I was. I don't blame him, though. I was probably making him uncomfortable with my mood swings. One minute I was fine, then in a second, I was a bawling mess again.It had only been two hours since I saw my mother cheating on my dad, yet it felt like it was two seconds ago. Then, to see him so nonchalant and unresponsive to it was my literal breaking point. I knew there was no way I could take it back, and maybe it was good that I actually saw it tonight. Perhaps it was for the best. We all knew that it was bound to happen eventually, after all. Now that her secret is out, they can go on with th