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The regret

last update Last Updated: 2025-08-20 21:36:07

Alastair

The party felt like a performance art that I was trapped inside.

It was a mistake coming here. Every smile I forced, every polite nod to Luciano's business associates, every moment of standing still while his hand rested possessively on my back felt like dying slowly in a suit.

A very expensive suit.

I hated it here, I didn't belong in this world nor would I survive in it.

I'd been watching Kyren and Anna all night, observing the way she looked at him with genuine adoration while he played the role of devoted fiancé. They moved through the crowd together like the perfect power couple, accepting congratulations on Anna's safe return and well-wishes for their upcoming wedding.

It should have been easier to watch, knowing that Kyren had chosen her. Knowing that whatever we'd shared was exactly what I'd told Luciano it was, just sex, just physical attraction, just meaningless encounters that didn't deserve the emotional weight I'd been giving them.

But watching them together stil
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  • The Devil You Made Me   The motel room

    KyrenWhat I had done had been very impulsive and stupid, but right now, I couldn't stop thinking about how good Alastair looked in that suit. Even rumpled from hours of driving, even with his tie loosened and his collar undone, he was beautiful. The way his dark hair had caught the wind through the open windows, how it fell across his forehead now as he leaned back against the headrest. I could tell from the way he stared straight ahead at the motel's chipped paint and sagging awning that he had a lot on his mind too.I started to ask myself why I had even done this. Run away with him like some lovesick teenager in a movie. We weren't what anyone would call textbook lovers. Hell, we weren't even friends most days. I was sure Alastair hated me, and he had every right to. I'd ruined his life so many times I'd lost count. The job opportunities I'd cost him, the relationships I'd destroyed just by existing in his orbit, the constant chaos that seemed to follow me everywhere I went.Bu

  • The Devil You Made Me   Mine alone

    KyrenThe Moonlight Motor Inn wasn't the kind of place I'd ever imagined staying. Neon signs flickered weakly in the darkness, and the parking lot was cracked asphalt dotted with cigarette butts and questionable stains. But it was cash-only, no questions asked, and far enough from the city that we could disappear for a while."Two rooms," I told the desk clerk, a tired-looking woman in her fifties who barely glanced up from her magazine."Fifty each, plus deposit."I counted out the bills, hyperaware of Alastair standing beside me in his expensive suit, looking as out of place as I felt. We'd driven for three hours in mostly silence, both processing what we'd just done and what it meant."Room twelve and thirteen," the clerk said, sliding two plastic key cards across the scratched counter. "Ice machine's broken, vending machine eats quarters."The rooms were connected by a door that looked like it hadn't been locked in years. Mine smelled like stale cigarettes and industrial cleaning

  • The Devil You Made Me   Escape

    Alastair "Same thing." His hands fisted in my jacket, pulling me closer even as his words pushed me away. "God, Alastair, what are you doing? Why are you letting him use you like this?""I don't have a choice.""You always have a choice.""Do I? Because from where I'm standing, it looks like all my choices have been taken away by men who think they know what's best for me." I kissed him again, harder this time, trying to memorize the taste and feel of him before this moment ended. "You chose Anna. Luciano chose me. Nobody asked what I wanted.""Leave him," Kyren said suddenly, his voice urgent with something that sounded like desperation. "Whatever hold he has over you, whatever he's threatened you with, we can figure it out together.""We?" I pulled back enough to look at his face. "There is no we, Kyren. You made that very clear when you chose to save Anna.""That was different. That was—""That was you showing me exactly where I stand in your list of priorities." I could hear the

  • The Devil You Made Me   The regret

    AlastairThe party felt like a performance art that I was trapped inside.It was a mistake coming here. Every smile I forced, every polite nod to Luciano's business associates, every moment of standing still while his hand rested possessively on my back felt like dying slowly in a suit.A very expensive suit.I hated it here, I didn't belong in this world nor would I survive in it.I'd been watching Kyren and Anna all night, observing the way she looked at him with genuine adoration while he played the role of devoted fiancé. They moved through the crowd together like the perfect power couple, accepting congratulations on Anna's safe return and well-wishes for their upcoming wedding.It should have been easier to watch, knowing that Kyren had chosen her. Knowing that whatever we'd shared was exactly what I'd told Luciano it was, just sex, just physical attraction, just meaningless encounters that didn't deserve the emotional weight I'd been giving them.But watching them together stil

  • The Devil You Made Me   A cheese in the trap

    KyrenHis hand moved again on Alastair's back, the gesture unmistakably possessive. When I looked at Alastair's face, I caught a flash of something that might have been pain or might have been resignation."Enjoy the party, Kyren," Luciano said, already turning away. "I'm sure we'll have many more opportunities to catch up in the future."They melted back into the crowd, Luciano's hand never leaving Alastair's back as he guided him toward a group of real estate developers. I watched them go, hating how Alastair fit into his arms when it should be mine."Boss?" Leo's voice cut through my paralysis. He'd appeared at my shoulder with Marco close behind, both men reading the tension in my posture and adjusting their own stance accordingly."What the hell is Luciano Moreno doing at this party?" I asked."That's what we were wondering," Marco said. "Guy kidnapped Anna two days ago, now he's drinking champagne at her welcome home party?""Miguel said they have business dealings together.""W

  • The Devil You Made Me   A game of cat and mouse

    KyrenMiguel's decision to throw a welcome home party for Anna was the stupidest fucking thing I'd heard all week. The last thing we needed was a public celebration that would draw attention to what had happened, that would give reporters and rival families an opportunity to ask uncomfortable questions about who had taken her and why.But Miguel was a man celebrating the return of his daughter, and logic wasn't part of that equation."We have to go," My father said as we climbed into the car for the drive to the their house. "Miguel expects us to be there, and maintaining that relationship is crucial for our family's future.""I know." I stared out the tinted windows at the city passing by, my mind still replaying that photo Luciano had sent. Alastair sitting in what looked like a luxurious prison, "But I don't have to like it.""You don't have to like any of your responsibilities, Kyren. You just have to fulfill them."The Serrano house was blazing with lights when we arrived, the c

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