It’s been a couple of weeks since Nico, Violetta, and I have all agreed to be a united force to reckon with. It seems insane to think the three of us are going to do this let alone make it truly work. In the normal world what we are doing being in this poly type relationship would probably be frowned on by most people. However, this is the illegal underworld and there aren’t many rules if any at all. There’s an advantage to being in the underworld, one that I don’t think VIoletta appreciates yet. Speaking of Violetta, both Nico and I are a bit concerned about her. She’s adjusted back to a regular sleep schedule, but without her job she doesn’t have much to entertain her. It’s clear she misses it. It’s clear she misses it with her new obsession with medical dramas. I might not know Violetta well, yet, but I know that isn’t really her. She’s not one for TV unless it's reality. Even the books she reads are non fiction. It’s almost as if she can’t stand the fact that she lives in a world
The wedding is soon, and I’m oddly looking forward to it. I can’t believe I’m looking forward to marrying Nico and Anthony. Well, Anthony I won’t be legally married to, but that’s just semantics. Those two possessive men will be all mine just as much as I will be theirs. As much as I’m looking forward to my life with Nico and Anthony, I still wish I had some purpose other than being their wife. I know kids are in our future, and while I want that it’s not all I want. I have to assume that I can have some life outside of wife and mom. Nico and even Anthony have to know it’s important for me to have more. Maybe when the time is right I’ll ask them about going back to work as a nurse, or something along those lines. I hate to think I wasted all those years getting a nursing degree for it to end up collecting dust. However, I have to admit there are perks to the mafia life. Call me a pampered mafia princess but I can’t deny it’s nice living with an indispensable wallet. Part of the reas
While Violetta is getting her sex lessons from Dedria, Anthony and I are off to meet someone a little unexpected. I’ve conducted plenty of business in the burlesque with my dad, but never with him being the party I’m negotiating with. Anthony found what I needed to confirm suspicions that something wasn’t right with my dad. His health has declined, and for good reason. The asshole has colon cancer. He’s hiding his cancer treatments that aren’t working. The doctors even told him not to bother with treatments because the chances of it working are slim. However, my father moved forward with the treatments. “Before we go up against my father, you are positive of the information you have. It’s not that I don’t trust you Anthony, I just don’t want to give my father a reason to poke holes in our alliance because he will. He will be furious with our union, but he’s ill and we can give him what I know he craves most; a peaceful death.” I know my father fears death, but even more he fears a pai
Dedria is making things so much easier for me. I’ve only met with her twice and both times we simply talked. It feels good to have someone validate my feelings about sex. I’m nervous. I know I shouldn’t be, but I am. I’m intimidated by Nico and Anthony with a lot of things. It’s not just with sex, it’s life in the underworld. They have power, influence, and men to back them. I hate feeling powerless because that’s exactly how my father made me feel. I appreciate that they are trying to be better than my father. Anthony and Nico aren’t my dad and they aren’t their father’s either. They are trying to do better, and I want to be at their side helping them. I’m going to my third session with Dedria. We meet late at night while Anthony and Nico are off conducting dirty business that I’m positive I want nothing to know about. I will confess there are parts of this life I definitely don’t want to know about. I like that they are giving me the option to pick and choose what I want to be a pa
I’m not surprised that Nico’s father is being difficult. He is still refusing to give Nico Don. At the point, Nico has to make the choice to end his father’s life. I know that it is hard for Nico to make that call. I can tell he still has respect for his father. I don’t sense a love between them much like there wasn’t love between my father and I. Something I plan to do differently with children. I want the three of us to be present parents, but I will not force it on Nico and Violetta if they aren’t overly fond of the idea. Somehow I have a feeling they will be on board with it and want to be present too. The three of us are striving to do better than our parents. To do that we have to weed out the bad apples. We have a week until the wedding. Nico and I are using Violetta’s sexual goddess lessons. I think it’s adorable she needs help embracing her sexual side. Dedria is right when she calls Violetta a unicorn. It’s not Violetta’s fault either. The men in her life made sure she was
The wedding is five days away. While I know our wedding cake is going to be a cannoli cake with cream cheese frosting and pretty chocolate designs that will be dusted in gold. I might know what our wedding cake looks like, but trying to confirm what topper to go on the cake is a whole other story. The three of us agreed to come out in a poly relationship at the reception. So, I want the cake topper to resemble that. I find it ridiculous that I can’t decide on a damn cake topper from the catalog in front of me. “Can I weigh in?” A sweet voice from my side draws my attention from thoughts. Sofia tagged along with me today, and I’m happy to have her with me. She’s a sweet girl who is so naive. Sofia lives in a bubble and she believes in a fairytale that I want to tell her is real. However, she’s young. Freshly eighteen and totally clueless about the real world. Sofia is another example of the women in the mafia world. Sofia is surprisingly thrilled to have a baby, but she also believes
Excitement brims in me as we head down the stairs into the brothel. Tonight is what I’ve been waiting for and I finally feel a bit prepared. I have to accept that on some level the guys will simply always have a bit more experience with sex than me. However, the important thing Dedria has taught me is that it’s not about what came before our partnership, it’s the relationship the three of us build from here on out that matters. There is a level of training that I will go through with the guys as I learn to be their submissive in the bedroom. Honestly, the whole submissive thing should piss me off given how verbal I am about making sure I have a place helping them lead the family businesses, however, I don’t like to have control when it comes to sex. I also think I’m so comfortable being a submissive to Nico and Anthony because I know they actually give a damn about me. I can never deny how much those two care and love me. So, giving them control is easy because I trust them. Even if
We are in the final days before the wedding. Anthony has successfully recorded my father’s approval video for the wedding reception. I’m honestly relieved Anthony was able to get the video and I don’t want to know the details of how he got it. I do know my father is dead and we will burry him in the family plot in the cemetery outside the city. He doesn't get a funeral or anything along those lines. Maybe that seems disrespectful but it is his wishes and that I will honor mainly because it makes my life a hell of a lot easier. I’ve been focused on the Angle Clinic and our not so legal Angle Death Clinic. We are getting ready to open and we are preparing to take Voiletta to the clinic and show her then night of the rehearsal dinner. She is still obsessively watching her medical dramas as much as she can when she isn’t occupied with wedding stuff. It’s possible she really enjoys them, but I’m skeptical because I know her and her deep love for reality TV. However, it is possible she now
RosieThe rain patters against the diner windows, drowning out the mundane sounds of the dinner. I grab my coffee and rather large chocolate chip cookie and head over to one of the vacant booths. The dinner isn’t far off the highway so we get a lot of truckers and travelers besides our regular locals. There was a good dinner rush, but around eight things died as the impending storm is to come that is proving to be a nasty one with wicked winds and bucket loads of rain. The spring storms don’t play games in the south and while there is currently no threat of a tornado, it still doesn’t ease my troubled anxiety. There are times that I envy Dorthy getting taken by a damn tornado to another land. At least then she didn’t have to figure out what hell to do with her life, but I guess she did face some challenges in Oz. Still, it seems better than the life I feel trapped in. I pop in my earbuds and find one of my true crime podcasts to listen to before I break a piece of my cookie off. I a
The rain patters against the diner windows, drowning out the mundane sounds of the dinner. I grab my coffee and rather large chocolate chip cookie and head over to one of the vacant booths. The dinner isn’t far off the highway so we get a lot of truckers and travelers besides our regular locals. There was a good dinner rush, but around eight things died as the impending storm is to come that is proving to be a nasty one with wicked winds and bucket loads of rain. The spring storms don’t play games in the south and while there is currently no threat of a tornado, it still doesn’t ease my troubled anxiety. There are times that I envy Dorthy getting taken by a damn tornado to another land. At least then she didn’t have to figure out what hell to do with her life, but I guess she did face some challenges in Oz. Still, it seems better than the life I feel trapped in. I pop in my earbuds and find one of my true crime podcasts to listen to before I break a piece of my cookie off. I ate din
I’m glad to finally be done with my shift at the diner. These late night shifts kill me, but I work during the day at the daycare my mom now manages. She used to run a babysitting gig in our house when I was younger, but as my mom got older she struggled to keep up with the smaller kids. Inevitably, with her bad back it made sense for her to stop running the babysitting gig. So, she ended up getting a manager position at one of the local daycares. She has so much experience and wisdom to give to the center. I ended up getting a job there when I turned eighteen as well as at the diner. I had to wait until I was eighteen and graduated highschool to get a job so I took two. I have a lot to catch up on since my mom insisted that I wasn’t allowed to work while in highschool. It was supposed to be her way of keeping me focused on school to be an A plus student. Isolating only made things worse for my socially at school, but I was raised to be a good girl and listen to her parents. Now, I’
There’s the hunter and the prey. I’m the prey that became the hunter. I started off as the prey to my stepfather. I was ten when he started sexually molesting me.There is something unique in losing your childhood innocence too early. It creates this unhinged need to protect your soul. Forget your heart because the trauma inflicted on you destroyed it along with your brain, whose chemistry will be forever changed from the horror you were forced to endure. I was thirteen when I was finally able to escape the perfect cage that was created to keep me nothing more than helpless prey. I was liberated by a neighbor named Dale who took my tales of what my stepfather was doing to me seriously. Unfortunately for me, I was a troublemaker as a kid. My father got locked up in prison when I was three for a cyber crime and by the time I was six, my mom had married my step dad who worked at one of the local factories making good money. My mom was never focused on me. She cared more about her career
Max and I have been married for a little over five years now. We have two sons who are Irish Twins because they are born less than twelve months apart. After my miscarriage, I was so devastated. Thankfully, I had an amazing support system that came around me. I was so angry at myself because I was focused on getting pregnant because that’s where I thought my issues lied. I was wrong, but thankfully with my mom on top of everything we quickly resolved the issue. When I got pregnant a couple months later with Misha, I was a wreck of emotions from happy to full on anxiety of losing the pregnancy. With careful monitoring from my doctors I carried to thirty eight weeks and gave birth to Misha Anthony and then about when he was about two and half months old I found I was pregnant with our second son Dimitiris Nico. I thought it was a fucking joke when I got pregnant with Dimitris. It was not a joke, and I was very glad to have not only Max to help me, but Nat as well. Nat has turned out to
It’s been about six months since we officially took Chatworth down. The media ate up his suicide. It was a satisfying victory and with our revenge satiated Toni and I focused on starting our family. We had a good surprise about four months ago. Toni got pregnant with what felt like so easy, considering we were expecting a battle to even get pregnant. Turns out that getting pregnant wasn’t the issue Toni was going to face, but her challenge comes with keeping the pregnancy. In the wake of her miscarriage, I felt fairly helpless to help her, which is why I was thankful for Nat living with us because she help me care for Toni after her procedure. Toni was only nine weeks old, but she needed a procedure to clear out the failed pregnancy. Violetta, Lucy, and Roxy have been helpful with Toni’s recovery. With testing they were able to figure out that Toni needs progesterone supplements during her first trimester minimum possibly the whole pregnancy. At least we have an answer, but even then
This is a surreal moment in time. Max sent proof of my father’s dead body a mer minutes ago and I’m still staring at the picture with a bag of mixed emotions. Relief is the biggest emotion coursing through me. My whole life my father has forced his control over my life. I’ve never even known what it was like to embrace my own self because I had to bury it deep down to survive. When my father sent me to cozy up to Max, he was supposed to be just a target. A means to end. My father was promising me freedom, but I know now it was all a lie of manipulation. I don’t know the full story behind my father and Misha, but they were friends at some point. Then one day they become more enemies. I’m sure it was my father who did something he shouldn’t have against Misha. The first moment I saw Max, I was attracted to him and it made sex easier. It’s hard to have sex with someone you don’t find attractive. I ended up keeping coconut oil or unscented lube to make myself easily wet so the men I was
“Good morning, Toni.” Nat greets. We decided to only use our nicknames when we are playing. Except for Max and I because we are married and clearly in a romantic relationship. “Morning, Nat.” I reply, flipping the french toast. “Is that French Toast?” Nat questions with a smile as she walks over to where I’m cooking on my built in skillet that is next to the stove. “It is. You earned it.” I wink at her. I told her last night that her reward for pleasing us like a good girl that I’d make her favorite breakfast. She earned it all right. “Good because I was really hoping I’d wake up to it.” She says as she moves over to make herself a cup of coffee. I giggle at her as Max walks freshly showered from his work out. He strides over to me and kisses me on the lips. “Morning, Princess.” He says breaking our kiss. He glances over at Nat. “Morning, Nat.” “Morning, Czar,” I reply, flipping a couple of pieces that need it. “Morning, Max. So, is today the day you think?” She questions as sh
It’s been a couple of weeks since Natalia essentially moved in with us. She is staying in one of the spare rooms. Our house has six bedrooms, and while I do want kids, I do not want more than two. Maybe three, but that’s my limit. Of course, all of that depends on how easy it is for me to get pregnant. Although, I’m glad I have the option to even try. As a woman, I’m outraged at what Chatworth did to Natalia. He had no right to take her womb for her. He stole her chance to be a mom and he did it in such a dirty way too. However, Natalia is at peace with the fact that she can’t have children. That doesn’t mean I won’t make sure Chatwroth doesn’t pay for his crime. No one has the right to make that choice for someone else.Natalia picked the room she wanted. I made sure she got a new wardrobe and she was happy to get a new one. Turns out, Natalia isn’t terrible in her taste in clothes, but clearly her father is. She’s also a pretty nice house guest or she might be trying to kiss my ass