Chapter 6: Her Confession

(Present Day)

(Piper POV)

While Dr. Eggert continues to watch me, I get up and walk to the window.  I stare at the wolves who are busy down below, and I secretly wish that I was among them. 

Or, at the very least, that I was anywhere but here.

Therapy is about facing your demons.  As much as I want to save my wolf, I am not sure that I am ready to do that.  Four years ago, I would have done it gladly.  But now?  Now too much has happened.  I do not know if I am strong enough to face my demons anymore. 

Nor do I know if it is even worth it to try.  If I tell Dr. Eggert everything, and she tells me that there is nothing that can be done… that losing Penelope and experiencing the betrayal pains are punishment for my misdeeds… it will take away whatever remaining shreds of hope I have away. 

“Piper?” Dr. Eggert asks, breaking me out of my trance.

“Yes?”

“Where did you go?”

“Just lost in thought.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Different things.”

“That’s not very descriptive.”

“No, it’s not,” I admit.

A couple minutes of silence passes between us.  Finally, Dr. Eggert breaks the silence for a second time.

“Your face changed when you brought up the one-year anniversary of running away.  Did something happen that night?”

I continue staring out the window.  “You could say that.”

“Do you want to tell me what it was?”

“No.”

I don’t want to tell anyone.  Not again.  The last —and only— time I told anyone what happened that night, the conversation did not go well.  The confession led to a lot of yelling, screaming, and crying.  Worse, confessing my mistakes ultimately led to me losing my best friend.

Xander’s reaction still plays like a cruel echo in my mind. 

It was a year later when I told him --so two years after I ran away.  I had naively expected understanding and sympathy from him.  Perhaps even relief that I made it through safely.  But instead, Xander’s cruel words cut me to my core.

“How could you be so stupid?”

“How could you betray me like that?  After everything I sacrificed.  After everything the pack has sacrificed.”

“Do you care about anyone but yourself?  Did you think of anyone else?”

“What would your mother think about what you did?  What would your father think?”

“You are nothing but a horrible slut.”

In all the years I had known him, Xander had never spoken to me like that. 

Perhaps he was just angry and said things he did not mean.  Or perhaps I deserved his reaction.  Perhaps I deserve what is happening to me now.  

“Piper?”

“Hmm?”

“I lost you again.”

“Sorry, Dr. Eggert.”

“Tell me what happened, Piper,” Dr. Eggert urges me.  “It will help you to get it off of your chest.”

“I made some big mistakes,” I respond truthfully.

“Teenagers are good at that,” Dr. Eggert replies. 

I know she is trying to make me feel better, but it is not working.

“My mistakes were bigger than most.”

“What happened?”

I say nothing.  Instead, I wipe away the tears that have managed to begin falling.

I hear Dr. Eggert sigh as she walks over to where I am standing.  She puts her hand on my shoulder.

“You can trust me, Piper.”

Again, I say nothing.  What can I say?

“Piper, whatever it was that you did, it cannot be that bad.”

I spin around and look at Dr. Eggert angrily.  “How can you say that?  You don’t even know what I did.” 

“I know that Luna Lily intervened on your behalf.  I know that she is waiting in the alpha’s office along with Alpha James and their two little pups, hoping and praying that I can help you.  I do not know if you know their story, Piper, but Luna Lily and Alpha James themselves had a rough go of it years ago.  They made mistakes, and they came out stronger.  They are good judges of character now.  They would not have intervened unless you were worth it.”

I wipe more tears away.  I want to believe that what Dr. Eggert is telling me is the truth.  But what if it’s not?  Or what if Luna Lily and Alpha James are wrong about me?

“What is your story, Dr. Eggert?” I ask, desperate to change the subject.

“I am not the patient, Piper.”

“You want me to trust you with my secrets, but you will not trust me with yours?”

“Who said I have any secrets?”

“Don’t you?”

“You are deflecting.”

“I am just asking a question, Dr. Eggert.”

“I am not the one who attacked a gamma wolf unprovoked, Piper.”

I scoff.  “It wasn’t exactly unprovoked.”

“What did he do to deserve the attack, Piper?”

“He was f&&king a she-wolf who was not his mate.  Third she-wolf in a week.  His future mate will thank me.  I was basically doing a public service.”

Dr. Eggert studies my face.  “Is that what you did?” she asks.

“What?”

“Did you sleep with someone else’s mate?”

Sh&t, sh&t, sh&t.

I turn and look out the window again.  I start to do mental math about whether I can safely jump out the window, and about how long it would take the guards to catch up with me.

“Piper?  Did you hear my question?”

“Tell her, Piper,” Penelope links me.  “Just tell her.”

I cover my face with my hands.

“Piper?” Dr. Eggert repeats.  “Did you sleep with someone else’s mate?  Is that the big mistake that you made on the one-year anniversary of running away?”

“Worse,” I whisper. 

"How could it be worse?"

“I slept with Leo Bloodstone.”