CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

NOLAN POV

I never planned to sleep on the floor, but that’s exactly what happened. I woke up and Gwen was still curled up against me. Her body was warm and soft.

The sun wasn't fully up, but the sky was getting bright. It had to be close to six-thirty in the morning. For a moment, I just lay there. I listened to Gwen's quiet, steady breathing. She was still deep asleep.

‘I'm in deep trouble.’

I don't spend the night with women. I don't wake up next to them. This time, I had to force myself to ignore my cock, which was fully awake and wanted to pull her close again and fuck her. But now it was time to stop dreaming and go back to the real world.

I carefully rolled away from her and stood up. I grabbed a thick blanket from the sofa and gently covered her. She smiled a little bit in her sleep but didn't wake up. I felt a strong pull in my chest, a sudden need to lie down next to her again. I ignored it. I was doing that a lot lately—ignoring my real feelings.

I gathered my clothes and went upstairs. I took a very quick shower. Then, I went outside to see how much snow had fallen and how soon I could get Gwen on her way home.

I knew the road wouldn't be clear right away. Still, I hoped it would be open by noon. Then we could try to dig her car out of the ditch and call a tow truck to pull it free.

I called the towing company, but no one answered. So, I made a strong pot of coffee. Then, I started clearing the snow from my front steps. My car was safe in the covered space next to the cabin, so I didn’t have to dig it out. I knew I had to deal with the long driveway later, but not just yet.

Instead, I went to the back of the house. I cleared the snow off my wooden deck and around the hot tub. Maybe I could take a nice, long soak later, once Gwen had left.

The image of Gwen sitting in the hot tub with me, looking up at the sky while I fucked her, flashed in my mind.

‘Stop it, Nolan. Just stop.’

When I finished outside, I came back in, ready to make breakfast. I checked the living room, but Gwen was gone. The blanket was neatly folded on the sofa, and her clothes weren't there. For a brief moment, I felt a stab of disappointment, but of course, I pushed it away.

I got out bacon, eggs, and bread for toast. A few minutes later, Gwen walked into the kitchen. Her long hair was damp, which meant she had taken a shower. She was wearing jeans and a bright red sweatshirt. It had a reindeer on it with blinking Christmas lights on its antlers. It was a clear sign. She was young. She was not someone I should be fucking. This thought made me feel cranky.

"You slept right through all the outside work, I see," I said, my voice sharp.

She flinched. Her eyes got wide, and I instantly felt like a jerk for speaking so harshly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I really didn't realize you were outside working," she said quickly.

"It doesn't matter," I cut her off. I didn't want to talk about it. "Are you hungry?"

She looked at me for a moment, probably wondering why I was acting like this. "I was actually going to call about my car first."

"Sure, go ahead," I said. I cracked three eggs into my cooking pan and pushed the lever down on my toaster.

Gwen pulled her phone out of her back pocket and started to walk out of the kitchen.

‘Let her go. It's better this way. Let her go.’

"You really should eat something first," I heard myself say. I couldn't stop the words.

She stopped moving and looked back at me. "But I should call."

"The roads won't be clear for a while," I told her, trying to keep my voice even and calm. I slid the cooked eggs onto a plate, pulled the bacon from the oven where it had been kept warm, and put the plate on the table. "I have toast too."

She chewed on her bottom lip, looking unsure what to do.

"Sit down. Eat," I ordered gently. The toast popped up with a clink. "Do you like butter on your toast? Do you want jam?"

She watched me closely, like I was an animal that might attack at any moment. But she did sit down at the table. "Butter is fine, thank you."

I prepared the toast and made my own plate, then sat across from her. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my mind. "Sorry I snapped at you earlier. I guess I'm just grumpy when I'm hungry."

"I'm happy to help with the chores," she offered. "I can do all the dishes when we're done—"

"Eat first," I said.

She started to eat, but the silence was heavy between us. It was like we were cutting off everything that had happened between us last night. The connection was broken. Soon, she would be gone. She would go back to her life, and I would go back to my empty one.

So why did I feel like I was losing something important?

Shit.