chapter one

    More often than not, people think they have nothing but pain to offer to their lover. Maya thought the same for me but all I saw was how complex and giving one must be to think that they're nothing but pain to others. We're all made of a thousand different things and emotions, some show, some don't. Neither of us are better than the other. You just need to look for the person who thinks the pain you give is beautiful. 

                                                                               -

Young-Jae always found life to be unpredictable. He could never guess something coming his way, it was as if on any coming day a life-changing surprise could be knocking at his front door in the morning and he wouldn't know what to do. Why? Well because he never did. Either way, he tried to embrace all of those changes, stuffing his protests and problems with them, deep down somewhere inside his chest where nobody could bother knocking, morning or evening.

Now, though physically in his room, Young-Jae let his mind carry him back home, he didn't know which home he wanted to go back to but it was a feeling of a home being present that he reassured himself with, every now and then. He clenched his jaw, squeezing his eyes with curled-up toes as he tried to take his mind away from the want of being home and instead on what he was actually doing. Another minute and Jae's body spasmed in pleasure.

The boy breathed heavily, a sheer layer of glistening sweat forming on his body. He lay sprawled out on his bed completely naked, the camera now turned off as he calmed down after the orgasm he just had. With much strength, he got up and turned off the speaker that was shuffling his 'two feet' playlist softly. Pulling his boxers up, he plopped down on the bed again and got under the covers again since it was a little chilly in his room.

He unlocked his phone, his skin shining prettily against the pink lights of his room and the little light from his phone too. Young-Jae scrolled through the various comments on his Livestream, some complimenting his voice and some his body. He weakly smiled to himself before switching to the new app he had just installed. It was a hookup app he had just installed, to look for a good fuck.

Min Young-Jae was twenty-four and he was pretty much unemployed if he didn't do the cam boy thing along with the waiting in the high maintenance cafe down the block. It wasn't just his financial problems it was also his 'thing', he liked doing it. He liked imagining the number of people who'd get off to his little actions and instructions every day, it made him feel loved.

It made him feel pretty, seen, and most of all wanted. No matter how much he denied his loneliness in front of his other friends, scratch that, friend, Kim Seok-Min, Young-Jae still felt the need to be held through his bad days, nightmares, everything but with thousands of people praising him every day even if they were hollow and only sexual, he did feel a little less lonely. Plus, it was a win-win for him, the funds he'd get were kind of enough for him to carry on nicely with his little life.

He jutted out his bottom lip when he didn't find anybody suitable and switched to Twitter instead. He opened his texts, two new girls had texted him so he one by one checked out their profiles before sighing and throwing the phone somewhere on the bed. It wasn't enough, the cam thing wasn't enough for him outside money. He wanted more, he wanted a real-life person to hold, to love, and to cherish like other people. Just a simple person who'd be with him happily.

A simple love story with a simple ending.

~

Min-Jae breathed heavily, a sheer layer of glistening sweat forming on her body as she lay sprawled out on her bed completely naked as she calmed down after the not-so-strong orgasm she just had. Turning the incognito tab off, a sigh left her lips in exasperation. Now what?

'What a boring fucking life,' She thought to herself as she got under the warm quilt again, placing the neon pink vibrator on the nightstand and fishing her phone out of her blazer pocket which had crumbled into a pile on her bed. She opened her Twitter account just to find a guy she could hook up with, without exposing her identity. At least a hookup would make her feel less lonely than usual plus the vibrators weren't really working now.

Min-Jae looked through various NSFW profiles for at least one that could provide her with good porn for at least half an hour but nothing came in sight. She blew her hair out of her face sighing multiple times when her phone lit up signaling that somebody had called her.

She checked the caller ID, it being nobody else but her beloved ex-fiance Jiwon who had gladly broken up with her not too long ago.  He was obviously calling to apologize, he had tried twice before but hearing him out now wasn't worth it so she declined the call blocking his number when he tried calling again the next minute and tried to focus on clenching-unclenching her fists.

Minjae looked up escort service numbers, something to make her feel better on nights like these. She told the person who had picked up the call a few of her preferences who further told her that she'd need to wait for about forty minutes before he'd arrive. She slipped into her robe, still in bed wiggling to get into it. Minjae stayed sprawled out on the bed till the bell of her huge empty house rang telling her that he was here.

She lazily got off the bed skipping a few stairs on the way and quickly swung the door open. The man before her was gorgeous, he smiled at her bowing his head slightly. She bowed back inviting him inside. He, whose name she wasn't really aware of, was dressed in a leather jacket and striped shirt underneath it. He got in kicking his shoes off and settled down on the couch while she bought him a drink to set the mood. He had a well-built body. Shoulders and chest broad along with soft, delicate facial features, almost ironically innocent of his purpose.

While pouring it, she saw him look at her ceiling and house in awe like a little kid. He certainly looked younger than her by a few years but she didn't mind as long as he was a good fuck. Minjae walked up to him. The younger boy's eyes shamelessly eyed the cut where the robe split with every step she took, hips swaying sideways sliding against the silk robe.

"What's your name?", she asked sitting down next to him and crossing one leg over the other giving him quite the view of her thigh. He smirked slightly, understanding her intentions. He leaned back on the couch, gliding his thumb over his bottom lip as he spoke.

"Jung," he said running a hand through his brown hair. She hummed gulping her drink before swinging one leg over his legs and straddling him. He let out a breath settling his drink on the table and placing his hands on her waist. She shifted slightly in his lap, her bare wet core brushing against the fabric of his jeans making both of them moan slightly.

"You're not wearing anything underneath this?", Jung questioned in a whisper running the fabric at the side of her breasts. She nodded whimpering almost inaudibly. His rough palms harshly groped her breasts and Minjae threw her head back grinding onto him almost automatically.

"Where's your bedroom?", he asked lifting his body off the couch along with hers.

"Upstairs," she replied and Jung nodded quickly walking to the stairs. Minjae started kissing his neck and he halted midway, pushing her along the wall on the stairs. Impatience was evident in his tone as well as pupils that were wide blown and she knew she looked the same.

"Let's do it here," he suggested leaning in, to nose the scent gland of her throat. Minjae tilted her head to the side giving him access. There were no protests from her side. She didn't mind as long as she had good sex.

She just wanted pleasure, wanted a simple life, good sex, and money. She already had the money, all she wanted was her stress relief. There was no room for love and romance after Jiwoon in her life, just simple pleasure.