Chapter 5: Nightmare

I quickly pushed this man away and slapped him on his right cheek.

Masses my anger at him intensifies even more at these times. What did he think of me as something to be tormented by his lust?

“I’ll pay you that bullshit ten billion dollars in one month.” I say emphatically to him. 

This man grinned, then he looked at me. “I’m just reminding you that you don’t have any more money.”

I just looked at him sharply at what he said. He’s right, I don’t have any money anymore, so how can I pay that much money in one month? Even if my salary is one million dollars every day for one month, my money will not be enough to pay him that much.

This man turned his back on me again and then walked to his swivel chair. He took his coat, then he threw it at me.

“Put on my coat.”

I looked at the coat he had thrown. This coat was big and long enough to cover my body until it was past the panty.

“Will you wear that or will I undress you so you can get out of this company undress?”

I quickly picked up the coat and put it on. After I put it on, I looked at this man again. He turned his back on me again as he looked out of such a glass wall.

Moments later, he put out his cigarette, then he turned to me and said, “Let’s go.”

I just raised one eyebrow at him after he said that. What does he mean? What did he think? I would still go with him after what he did to me?

When he approached me and intended to touch me, my body moved away from him on purpose.  I immediately felt scared after I saw that he was in front of me.

I looked him in his face. He left his hand in the air when he planned to touch me.  It was as if he had seen a ghost in what I had done.

When I looked at him, I also quickly took my eyes off him. He looked at me sharply and for a moment, it seemed like he was an animal and a mob. Scary, terrifying.

“What the fuckn hell is your fuckn problem?!” he screamed that startled me and I jumped slightly.

When I saw him step closer to me, I stepped back towards him. My whole body hair stood on end in fear. I also hugged myself and closed my eyes. I don’t want to see him. I’m scared.  I feel like every time he looks at me like that, he’s going to do something bad on me.

“One more step away from me. Prepare yourself because you won’t like what I do to you.”

After hearing his voice, I felt like I was an ice cream melting because of the excessive weakness I was feeling. I was dizzy because I was so scared of him just by his voice.

“Damn, careful.”  I heard him say after he held my arm.

“Please... don’t touch me.”

For a few moments I felt like I was floating in the air so I tried to open my eyes. After I opened my eyes, his emotionless pair of eyes opened up to me. He carried me in a bridal style.

“Please don’t touch me.”  I said softly.

“Shut the fuck up. How the fuck can I fuckn lower you if you can’t fuckn even stand up properly? Even if we don’t do anything fuckn yet,  you won’t be able to walk right away.”

I did not hear the last things he said because I just felt the weakness and heaviness of my eyelids.

 ..

 ..

 ..

As usual, I ate together with my parents, because today is my birthday. Our meals are special on my birthday, because Mommy and I cook what we will eat.  The maids and others in the house are sent home for a day off until next week, but there is no deduction from their salaries.

My parents always did that.  Every time it’s my birthday, all their employees in the company and here at home send home or take a day off so that they can be with their family and I can also be with my parents the whole day without any nuisance.

One of the days I really like is my birthday.  Because, every birthday we have the opportunity to be together the whole day.  We are all always busy, so we often just eat together and talk.  My parents are busy with the company, while I am especially busy with school.  Every time it’s my birthday, no matter what day it is, they dedicate their whole one day to celebrate my birthday.

I just gasp every time I think about our thesis defence. I feel like my head will explode with the amount of memories I will have.

“How’s school, Carla Christine Zabala?”  My father asked me.

“It is really necessary to call my whole name, Dad?”  I jokingly ask him.

Both my parents just laughed at my question.

“Well, school is okay.  I have all passed the exam.  My thesis defence really hurts my head, but I will surely pass that. ”  I’ll just answer.

My mother and I laughed when Daddy shook his head.  “Thesis defence, I remember that semester.”  Daddy said, laughing.

“Why, dad?”  I smiled when I asked.

“Because your daddy always stuttered on our defence day.”  Laughing Mommy said.

And my parents started to annoy each other about their thesis defence back then.  This is how they often are, they tease, but in the end Daddy loses to the two of them. It’s either Daddy just lost so that Mommy wouldn’t be angry with him or he really lost when Mommy was teased.

I smiled with great joy as I watched my parents while happily teasing each other, because that’s the tenderness of the two of them.

Someday, I want to find a guy like Daddy. There is no one else to love but Mommy.  I never saw them fight because of another woman.  In stress, maybe—stress at work, but every time the two of them fight, Daddy is the first to approach and will understand Mommy.

I hope one day, I find someone like Daddy and I will be like Mom, who also has no one else to love but Daddy.

 -

 -

When my parents finished teasing each other, Daddy faked a cough and then he raised his wineglass that contained wine. So, we also did what Daddy said, then he started speaking until he said the word “Cheers!”

I was about to toast my wineglass to my father’s wine glass, but I was stunned because I told them I had something to take. I almost forgot that I would surprise them too. I painted their wedding picture.

I put my wineglass down on the table and then let them know that I just had something to take to my room. They happily allowed me as long as I just hurried.

Standing up and turning my back on my parents, I stopped and looked at them. For reasons I can’t understand and explain, I don’t want to leave them. 

I just sighed and then ran to my room. Maybe it’s that I’m just drinking too much coffee, so that’s why I’m thinking and feeling too much and weird. Coffee should really be made only once a day and not made as a meal or dessert every time you eat it.

When I went to my room, I immediately took the portrait I had painted with my parents. As I look at it I can’t help but to smile. I love my parents dearly and I don’t know what I will do in case I lose them.

I quickly shook at what I was thinking.  What are these things I’m thinking about?  I shouldn’t be thinking of such things.

I quickly left my room and then went straight to the dining area.

“Mom, Dad. I’m sorry if I took too long. I have a surprise for the both of yo---”

When I entered our dining area, I quickly released my grip to the portrait I am holding and my whole body went numb from where I was standing.

What... What Is this?  What happened here?  Why is it like this?

I just felt a series of tears falling in my eyes.  I tried to walk properly but only three steps later did my knees soften, causing me to not be able to stand properly.

I closed my eyes firmly on them.I slowly looked at my Dad. There was blood coming out of my father’s head. It looked like he shot a gun to the head.

“Dad!”  I cried and shouted.

What happened to Daddy didn’t sink in yet to my head and to my soul but, I just saw that Mommy was also lying on the cold floor and like Daddy, blood came out of Mommy’s head and to her stomach.

I almost crawled when I approached the two of them.

My whole body was shaking when I touched Daddy, who was now slowly bathing in his own blood.

I shook Daddy as I called it out.  But no matter what shake I do, he doesn’t open his pair of eyes.

“Daddy, please wake up. Daddy!”

I looked at my mother. “Mom!”  I cried aftet I saw her one hand move.

I quickly almost crawled over to Mommy.  As I approached Mommy my tears poured like one waterfall down my pair of eyes.

“Mom, please. Please, fight, I’ll just call an ambulance. Please, don’t close your eyes. Don’t leave me. I don’t know what I’ll do if I lose you too.”

Mommy stroked my right cheek, “I... Love... You... Carla Christine Zabala, my daughter.”

“I love you too, Mom. I’ll just call an ambulance.”

“W... Wait, I have something important to say.”

“You... You are...”

 “Mom!”  I couldn’t stop screaming when Mommy coughed up blood. “I will call an ambulance, first.”

Even though my whole body was soft, especially my knees, I forced myself to stand up and go back to my seat earlier to pick up my cell phone.  When I got it,  I quickly went back to where Mommy was. But, my heart stopped beating and my time stopped after I saw Mommy with her eyes closed.

No. No. Please.

I ran over to Mommy and slowly tapped her cheek, but no matter what I did tapping her cheek she never opened her pair of eyes.

This is not true. It was just a nightmare that it happened. Nothing true here. I want to wake up to this nightmare.