ログインMy secretary looks more like the boss in his seat than I ever will.
He’s desk is directly opposite mine, something I had to order him to do otherwise it was a no.
His tie is loose, jacket somewhere on the back of his chair, hair sticking out everywhere from running his fingers through it several times.
The sight sends a jolt straight to my dick, and it’s impossible to concentrate when he was sitting opposite me with his glasses perched on top of his nose.
I watch closely, unable to peel my eyes off him, he turns a page on his stack of papers, arm flexing, he had rolled his shirt arms to the elbow, so the line of tattoo that runs under his shirt is visible.
I swallow.
The number of times I have imagined tracing that very line with my mouth is heart stopping.
Suddenly he looks up and I shoot up from my seat, every inch of me covered in skin feels unbearably hot.
“Bathroom.” I squeak,
With this hard on, it’ll be impossible to concentrate, I had to do something about it.
He gauges me for a bit before nodding once, for some reason I stood there until he was done, only leaving when he gave the directive.
The other offices are almost empty, from up here, I see them.
The Bitters law firm is very state of the art. The first floor housed the best of the best lawyers, the other floors were others competing to get to a floor higher than theirs.
Only elevators in this building, because god forbid someone’s late and has to take the stairs, my father may have a stroke at the thought of it.
This floor had four offices, but only mine has light coming from it..
Which is good, because then I could ‘use’ the bathroom for as long as I liked.
Locking the door behind me, my reflection in the mirror immediately points out to me that my tight pants broad casted the hard on.
“Well, fuck.” I mutter,
My immediate thought is to use the material I gathered today, I mean I saw his arms, I see those once in three months, it’ll make me come fast, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to do it.
Instead, I call my best friend.
“Someone better be dead, or someone will be dead.” her hissing comes through the speakers, and I pull the phone away from my face.
I chuckle, something about the threat works wonders because the boner is going down fast.
“Something is dying, does that count??” I ask, glancing down at my crotch.
She groans and asks to give her a second.
“It’s my second date with Stella, and I am going to get lucky tonight, I can feel it, well, could feel it, until your call came in.” she grunts.
I huff.
“An all nighter?”
I exhale. Eva and I have always been inseparable since high school, and I don’t know how I survived without her, at all. So she knows how to decipher my feelings without seeing my face.
“Christ, I told you to avoid the straights!” she hisses once again.
I rub my eyes and the image of his arms, thick, veins zig zaging around his tattoo, flashes my mind. The boner returns and I groan.
“Okay fine. What’s his name? Full name?” she exhales, this grounding technique we’ve done since I found out he was straight.
She had cradled me as I cried the entire night, and this technique was born.
“Asher Hall.”
“Age?”
I wince. She has always been one for age gaps, and I wasn’t. Before Asher, I was a firm believer of dating your age, since you’d be on the same plane.
“Carson, how old is he?” she asks drily when I don’t answer the first time.
“Twenty eight.” I grumble,
“Good, in your words, you’re not on the same plane. Now, what’s his type?”
That makes me sigh, my eyes finding the too elaborate, shiny lights overhead. This question was the one that hits me hard, the one that hits me the hardest is on it’s way.
“Women.”
“That’s right. He likes the hips and dips and breasts and pussy…”
“I get it.” I grit out, feeling annoyed at her. I know she’s doing this for my own good, and Asher and I won’t work, but I like to live in a fantasy.
“Awwn. Keep that anger, you’ll need it, and lastly… he’s your father’s underdog.”
That. That line does it.
The boner disappears instantly.
“Right.”
I hear her move, and I imagine she was warming herself up.
“We don’t like the older Bitters.” she reminds me.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her that he just works for my father, he’s not him. However, even I know that’s an excuse.
“Oh, it’s freezing. I definitely can’t go to sleep tonight, I think a storm is coming too.” she says shivering.
That’s my cue to drop the call or keep cock blocking her. Or pussy blocking?
“I wish you luck with Stella.”
“I don’t need luck, I am exactly what she likes.”
My finger pushes the red button before she says more, my eyes narrow at the phone like she could see me.
“You just wait, I will find someone that actually likes the facilities I have and like them, and they’ll like me.”
Taking a deep breath, I steady myself.
It’s just very large arms, pretty arms, any man has those.
Slapping my cheeks, i pysche myself up.
“You’ve got this Carson, you can totally work opposite him and actually work.”
The overhead fancy light goes out.
As with all the other lights.
My eyes blink in the darkness, cussing, I turn on my phone light.
Is there an actual black out? In the Bitters firm??
The press are going to have a field day with that one. It makes me almost too giddy thinking about it.
Finding my way out of the bathroom, I head to the office.
My light flashes on his face and his eyes shut.
“Oops, I’m sorry.” I apologize swinging the light away from his eyes. His beautiful eyes.
“You were gone a while.”
I try not to read too much into it, like I did at first. I would turn his words around in my mind until they sounded like he was longing for me.
Turns out I am no better than I was five months ago.
I still think to myself that he noticed my absence, he was waiting for me.
Okay maybe not that far.
“Yeah… do you think they’ll turn the lights on back anytime soon?” I ask, distracting him and myself from the reason I went to the bathroom.
Walking to the large windows that looked down at the city, expecting to see it glittering in the night, a sight that usually calmed me down.
But looking out, I see that the rest of the city is in total darkness.
Snow was coming down hard now.
House tops covered in white.
If I were home, this would have been perfect.
Then I glance at the man behind me, whose eyes are on his phone.
My stomach does a saumersault.
This was actually better.
“I’m afraid I can’t reach the maintenance team. The phones don’t work.”
I frown, “What do you mean they don’t work? I just finished speaking with Eva.”
He raises a perfect brow,
“I thought you were in the bathroom.”
“You didn’t believe me anyway.” I say waving his accusations away.
Looking back at the window, the entire city was in a black out, and we can’t contact anyone outside.
We can’t go downstairs until the lights came back on, downside of a building that only believes in elevators.
Outside the storm comes down heavier, swallowing the city whole.
Inside, the silence stretches, charged and waiting.
We’re alone up here. No calls. No witnesses.
And I am locked in here with him all night, and the part of me that should be terrified is already thrilling instead.
ASHER HALL Seeing Carson so broken, watching his friends pick him up, knowing the kind of man he is, the kind that hated being a burden, knowing that he’d hate being like that. It broke me. Watching him look so utterly defeated and being unable to take him in my arms, to protect him from the monster in his life.I’d felt sick.But I also knew I didn’t want his efforts to go to waste.So I’d fisted my hands, blinked away the tears, forced myself to look unaffected, like my heart wasn’t thrashing about in my chest.I pretended he didn’t matter.Crawford had swung into action immediately Carson’s friends took him away. Because contrary to what he says, he’s afraid of his son. He knows Carson will be his undoing, it was only a matter of when. He amped up his security, made sure his extracurricular affairs didn’t make it back to the news.I watched him in contained rage, the way he barked orders, paced, face white. He was different from all
Everything passes slowly and in a blur at the same time.My mother had exchanged herself for Fiona, who threw herself at me immediately she saw me. Crawford’s men had pulled her off me, and I couldn’t have felt any less disgusted with myself if I tried. He was dragging her off to heaven knows where, where anything could happen to her. But she was screaming for me the whole time. I’ll hear her threats to my father for the rest of my life. And the way he was taken aback by her screams of murder.I wish I could say I helped her. I put her there, I’m the reason her child will grow up in a cage.The thought of that made me feel less than human. Even more than I felt before. “Your own mother didn’t want you. I told you, but you wouldn’t listen. This is what happens when you don’t follow your destiny.” he had said. He was a monster, through and through. However, there’s a vast difference between guessing that he’d be able to do something and watching him do it.The only shred of humanity
The memories come flooding back. All the times I saw him hang by her statue, all the times I caught him lingering with an expression full of longing… all the times I ran here, I walked by, I was walking past my mother. If I had looked closer, I would have known, I could have saved her… if I lived here instead of demanding my own place. Maybe she wouldn’t have spent the last few years underground.I thought he couldn’t possibly fuck with me any more than he already did.But he’s Crawford, I should have expected something of this magnitude from him.Separating mother and child but keeping them together at the same time. Only Crawford could manage that.A terrible cry falls from my mother’s lips, snapping my attention to her. She’s awfully pale, almost translucent from the lack of sunlight. My heart constricts at the sight of her. There’s not much I remember about the woman that birthed me, not her smell, nor her smile, nothing about her screamed familiar, but I knew deep down in my bone
I’m full of self loathing and guilt as the address comes in. It’s the main house, where I grew up. Where all my demons are. I can’t help but notice the irony, it’ll end where it started, at least for me.Fiona suggests we tie her up, or cuff her to make it believable, but she takes one look at my expression and quickly changes her mind, I wonder what she sees, guilt, shame? The fact that I can’t call myself human after this is over?Tim drives us there, the whole time my neck is stiff, and spine is arrow straight.My friends already made celebratory plans for when all of it is over, but I know what they’ll find after. I’ve been working on it. They’ll hate me, but they’ll understand that there’s nothing for me here anymore.They’d understand.As the car inched closer to the main house, images of being jerked around by Crawford floods my mind. The time I ended up running down this driveway in nothing but boxers and a busted lip.No one was down here, no one came to save me.At the end, I
My lungs refuse to work as Fiona speaks with Crawford. It feels sticky inside, blood frozen in my veins. She must sense my guilt, so as she speaks in a shaky voice, she doesn’t look up at me. Still, it doesn’t ease the boulder that lodges itself in my chest. Crawford asks to speak with me and she finally turns to me, eyes full of regret, she shoots me a small, watery smile before handing me the phone. My hands are stiff. Tim walks to me, standing right next to me so I know he’s here, brows drawn, glare as hot as the sun directed at the phone. I find it’s easier to breathe with the realization that I’m not alone. Crawford doesn’t say anything, but his too steady breathing over the phone lets me know exactly what is going on, he’s angry in ways that he’s just inventing himself. Plus, the silence is to rattle me. I square my shoulders.This is war. We’ve been going at it since I was born, he’s always had the upper hand, this time though, I managed to one up him, and with that hand and
CARSON BITTERS POV I threw up thrice before Robin said we should call the whole thing off, arguing that we’d try again with something less dehumanizing.“Don’t be stupid. This our only chance and you know it. We blow it and I’ll be chasing cold trails for the rest of my life. Those girls will never have a life in the meantime.” I had said, glaring at him from the floor of the toilet.I’d never seen him so rattled, for the first time in a long time, I saw that look in his eyes again. Like he pitied me. And I fucking hated it.“It’s us.”“What?”“We’ll be chasing cold trails for the rest of our lives. There hasn’t been a time we weren’t in this together. And there never will be.”My acidic mouth was left hanging for a while, his words sinking in slowly. It’s not the first time any of them mentioned it, but it hits a lot different when you’re literally at rock bottom where it seems going up is a distant dream. Scrubbing the back of my hand across my mouth
Carson is nowhere to be found.Lynn made me talk about him while I ate, she was trying to make me eat, and it worked. I could talk about him for hours unend and still have things to say. I told them about our snowball fight– their faces fell when they heard I’d never done that before. With every w
CARSON BITTERS POV “You can’t kick me out! You’re my best friend in the whole entire world!” I scream as Eva continues to drag me by the ankles. I latch on to the leg of her table, as she drags me, she drags the table along.When she turns around to see me latched unto the
I lose time and space, the world around us slowing down without us as the words crash down on me.It was obvious when I started getting restless about him that my feelings were more than platonic. I wanted to own him, be inside him, be one with him. I should have known then, but I know now. I also
Carson twists under me, trying to flip himself to his stomach.Not a fucking chance.I grab his wrists quickly, pining them above his head, he struggles, his little grunts filling the air as he does. I don’t let up, watching him struggle, every time he pulls away I hear the unmistakable sound of my







