The Man I Craved

Jake's Pov

The chlorine smell hit me before I even opened the back gate.

My stomach twisted, not because of my nerves but this particular moment.

I'd been thinking about this moment for three years.

Three years of Devon's dad existing as this forbidden fantasy I'd shoved into the back corner of my mind, only pulling it out late at night when I was alone.

Marcus Chen. God, even his name made my skin prickle.

"Yo, birthday boy!" Devon's voice cut through my thoughts as I stepped onto the stone patio. He was already in the pool with his girlfriend Emma draped over his shoulders like a wet towel. "Finally! Thought you were gonna bail."

"Traffic was hell," I lied, adjusting the strap of my duffel bag. Truth was, I'd sat in my car for fifteen minutes in their driveway, trying to talk myself down.

This is just a vacation. You're eighteen now. You're mature. You can handle this.

But then I saw him.

Marcus was climbing out of the deep end, water cascading down his body in rivulets that caught the late afternoon sun.

His dark blue fitted swim trunks hung low on his hips, and every muscle in his torso flexed as he pulled himself up the ladder.

My eyes travelled from his dark hair, silvered at the temples to his strong jaw and those eyes.

Christ! They always seemed to see straight through whatever bullshit facade I was wearing.

He grabbed a towel from one of the lounge chairs and that's when he noticed me.

Our eyes locked.

My breath caught in my throat. Just like that, I was fifteen again, hormonal and confused, watching him through the kitchen window while Devon and I pretended to do homework.

But I wasn't fifteen anymore. I was eighteen, legally an adult, and the way he was looking at me right now made that very, very clear.

"Jake." His voice was deeper than I remembered. Without breaking eye contact, he ran the towel over his face, then down his chest. "Good to see you. Devon said you'd be joining us."

"Yeah." My voice came out strained. I cleared my throat. "Thanks for having me, Mr. Chen."

He looked amused for a moment, "You're eighteen now. Marcus is fine."

Marcus.

He said it, slowly, like he was daring me to use his first name, to cross that invisible line between kid and adult.

"Right. Marcus." It felt foreign on my tongue, intimate in a way that made heat pool low in my stomach.

Devon splashed over to the edge of the pool. "Dude, get changed! We're doing shots in like twenty minutes. Dad bought the good tequila."

Of course he did, because not only was Marcus Chen attractive and successful, he was also the cool dad who bought alcohol for his son's eighteenth birthday.

The dad who looked at me like he knew exactly what kind of thoughts kept me up at night.

"Guest room's the same as always," Marcus said, finally breaking eye contact to towel off his arms. "Second door on the left."

I only nodded because I could not trust my voice anymore, and practically fled inside.

The house was exactly as I remembered but it felt different now as if the air itself was waiting for something to happen.

I dropped my bag on the guest bed and sat down hard, pressing the heels of my hands against my eyes.

Get it together, I whispered to myself. You're here for Devon. This is his birthday trip. You are not going to spend the next week fantasizing about his dad.

Except I already was.

I could still see the water dripping down Marcus's chest, the way his muscles moved under his skin, the bulge in those swim trunks that I definitely shouldn't have noticed but absolutely did. And that look he'd given me as if he was sizing me up, evaluating me.

My phone buzzed as a text from Devon came in.

Hurry up slowpoke. Dad's making his famous margaritas.

I changed into my swim trunks quickly, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I'd filled out since the last time I was here.

My shoulders were broader now and my abs more defined thanks to daily gym sessions that were definitely not motivated by impressing anyone in particular.

I ran my fingers through my dark hair, pushing it back, then immediately felt stupid. This isn't a date. Stop preening.

But when I walked back out to the pool and saw Marcus's eyes track down my body before snapping back up to my face, I was glad I'd looked.

"There he is!" Devon thrust a massive margarita glass into my hand. The rim was crusted with salt and the contents were a dangerous shade of green. "Dad makes them strong, so pace yourself."

"I'll try to keep up," I said, taking a sip. It was strong. Tequila hit my tongue first, followed by lime and something sweet and smoky that made me want to keep drinking.

"Good?" Marcus asked. He was standing by the outdoor bar, mixing another batch, and the casual way he asked felt loaded as if he was asking about more than just the drink.

"Really good," I managed to say.

Emma giggled from the pool. "You should see your face! You look like you just took a shot of straight alcohol."

"Because I basically did," I laughed, but it came out nervous. I took another sip to cover it.

The afternoon turned into evening. We took more drinks and splashed in the pool for a while. Devon and Emma were being increasingly handsy in a way that would've been annoying if I wasn't so distracted by Marcus.

He stayed on the periphery mostly, manning the grill, refilling drinks, making sure everyone had what they needed. He was the perfect host but I felt his attention on me constantly.

Every time I dove under the water. Every time I climbed out to grab another margarita or I laughed at one of Devon's stupid jokes.

It was like being watched by a predator, only it was thrilling and terrifying in equal measure.

As the sun started setting, Devon and Emma disappeared inside, claiming they needed to "shower and get ready for dinner." The quotes were implied by Devon's smirk, which left me alone in the pool with Marcus sitting on the edge, feet dangling in the water.

There was uneasy silence between us.

"You've changed," Marcus said finally. "Since the last time you were here."

I swam over slowly, hyperaware of every movement, every breath. "It's been three years."

"I know." His eyes were dark in the fading light. "You were just a kid then."

Were.

I reached the edge where he was sitting and crossed my arms on the pool deck, looking up at him. From this angle, he was even more imposing.

His broad shoulders blocked out the sky and his jaw was tight as though he was refraining himself.

"And now?" I asked, the tequila making me braver than I should've been.

His eyes dropped to my mouth, then back up. "Now you're not."

My heart was pounding so hard I was sure he could hear it. The space between us felt electric.

He was Devon's dad. My best friend's dad. This was wrong on every conceivable level but I couldn't look away.

"Marcus," I started, not even sure what I was going to say.

He leaned down slightly, close enough that I could smell his cologne, "Be careful, Jake," he said quietly. "This week is going to test both of us."

Then he stood up and walked away, leaving me breathless and aching in the pool, the water suddenly too warm around me.

I knew right then that this vacation would be unlike any other.

And I'd never wanted anything more.