This is a story about how I met a man I hated to love. His name is Constantine...
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It was a summer morning, and I was feeling slightly off about today. Something in me told me not to go outside but I couldn't help it. I needed to work in order to pay for my wedding.
Everyone was so proud that little old me was marrying a man who was a dentist. Such a respectable profession my mother quipped when she learned of my relationship with Doctor Evan Sterling.
Your children will be geniuses and beautiful, my father said, happily shaking Evan's hand and shaking the man's whole body in the process.
Did I want to marry Evan?
That I didn't know as yet.
He put me on the spot in a restaurant filled with people after a year of dating and I felt too bad to say no not yet I'm only twenty-five and not a woman from the eighteen hundreds.
I did care for Evan. He was a nice guy and I found him attractive I just didn't think we'd settle into marriage so soon. I thought we would have more time.
The wedding was in three months and I felt like a cornered animal. Every time I tried to talk to Evan about pushing the date a little further he said why wait. He had 'plans' for our future and that gave me anxiety.
My sister talked him up by saying he would be good for me. He was unlike the men I dated before. Evan was responsible and he cared a lot about me. That should be enough to want to marry him but why did I want to wait so bad?
I believed in soul mates because I've seen it. My grandparents met when they were kids and they ended up being married for forty years. My parents met in highschool and after college they tied the knot. My aunts and uncle have all been married for over twenty years now and it seemed like my family was lucky to have found someone to stick with them for so long. They were all happy and I came to the conclusion that maybe soul mates are real.
I just didn't want to get married because someone was good for me. I wanted to know if they were my epic love. That I wouldn't get tired of dealing with them every single day.
It was like someone saying, eat bran flakes every morning because it's good for you but it didn't change the fact that it tasted like wet wood munch!
"Ms?" A short balled headed customer called.
"Yes?" I questioned. Could he not see that I was having a mid-twenties crisis.
No, he couldn't. He was too much in a hurry to go home and use this hair growth shampoo on his nogen. I scanned the item and moved it to the opposite end of the counter. "Paper or plastic?" I asked.
"Surprise me," he said.
"Woah you're a wild one," I grabbed the paper.
"Bitcchhh," my sister yelled walking into the store. "I broke up with that dick head." She caused a commotion, kicking over a wet floor sign and almost going sliding like a penguin.
Everyone was now staring. The bald man halted in his steps as she came over and blocked the walkthrough. "Not now Rain. I'm working," Not that it would stop her but it was worth an attempt.
"Please April," she begged, "take an early break I need to vent."
Our parents came up with our names the instant we were born. When Rain was born it was raining and I was born in April so they named me after the damn month.
"Hi I'm Bob," the man said.
"I'm sure you are, sweety," my sister said and I put the closed sign on the counter causing my long line of customers to fuss and move over to the next counter.
"So tell me what happened." I leaned over, looking nothing less than intrigued.
"It's Darren's birthday today and I woke up early and everything to get him his favourite cake," she cried, "from that bakery down on Westlands. I drove for one fucking hour," she cried and I handed her the box of tissues I had under the counter, "I get to his apartment and a woman wearing nothing but a towel around her body answered the door."
"Omg," Bob chimed in.
Rain blew her nose in the tissue. "So what did you do?" I asked. I would have been infuriated but it was not the first time Darren cheated on Rain. I told her not to take him back after the first but she never listened to me and threw the soulmate card in my face.
"I smashed the cake in her face and then I walked into the apartment and dropped the hot coffee on Darren's crotch."
"Girl you did not," Bob smacked Rain's arm playfully and we both turned to look at him.
"What are you still doing here," Rain and I chimed together.
"I'm lonely," he admitted, "I only have a fish to go home to."
Rain patted his shoulder. "There there, Bob."
"What the hell is going on out here," my manager Phil walked up to us, "April?" He looked at me and then he looked at my sister. "I told you if this crazy-"
"Hey, I am not crazy!" Rain defended.
"Yes, she's not. Our parents had her tested when we were little," I backed her up.
"You out of here," my manager ordered and Rain sighed.
"Let's go, Bob," she said and moved to go to the door.
"Okay," Bob agreed happily and followed after her.
My manager turned to me. "You're fired," he said.
"What!" That was hardly fair. "My sister had a problem."
"It's not just about your sister," the man looked seconds away from a heart attack with his red face and sweat-stained shirt. "The customers have been complaining about your less-than-dandy customer service."
My temper began to rise. "You got to be fucking me right now! I was dandy. I was fucking dandy doo da all the damn day even when these people with their snotty-nosed children who would scream their lungs out for this stupid shit," I threw a headless Barbie at Phil and he shrieked, smacking it away. "I watched a woman wrestling with her kid until Barbie's head popped out and the kid screamed causing me to go deaf in one ear for ten minutes. I didn't complain that the kid's boogers were on the doll I handled that shit and put the Barbie with her head in the return-to-shelf box."
My manager's eyes widened and then I noticed everyone was staring at me. I may have had a bit of a temper problem. I let out a deep breath remembering my meditational breathing exercises. "You know what. You can stick it," I said and grabbed my bag.
I skipped my way to my car feeling more than happy with myself. Confucius once said to do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life. The truth was I did love something. I was an artist. I loved painting.
But I barely sold any pieces.
My work was once critiqued as lacked soul. That comment out of all the nasty ones seemed to stick with me the most. I'd like to think I had soul but many said it seemed like I held back in my art.
I got into my car and drove away from the pit known as a grocery mart. If people only knew what went on in the back of that storeroom. They would know it was probably safer to eat food out of the trash.
It was still early so traffic was still a bit busy. There was this pompous ass revving his Lamborghini at the stop light. I decided to call Evan and tell him the bad news. "Hey honey," he answered on the second ring.
"Hey baby, listen I..."
"I forgot to tell you that my parents are bringing my grandmother over for Sunday lunch. She has been so eager to meet you..." He rambled on.
I let out a couple of breaths, readying myself to get through this. I closed my eyes tightly wishing for him to stop talking so I could just rip the bandaid off.
But once Evan started talking he couldn't stop. The conversation would leap from one topic to another sub-topic and then he will come back and make his point.
A car from behind me honked in the tight traffic and my foot slipped. I hit the gas in my frustration, knocking into the black Lamborghini.
Fuck.
The cars all honked their drivers very gracefully wishing me a good morning with their middle fingers as they drove around me.
A man got out of the Lamborghini wearing a beige suit. I was going to be paying out my ass and my cheap broke ass didn't get insurance so yes I was screwed.
Was it too late to play dead?
The man wrapped on my window with his knuckles. "Honey, honey?" Evan called.
"I'm going to have to call you back," I said and hung up the phone.
The man knocked on my window again. "okay okay keep your panties on," I muttered rolling down the window.
"Hey," I smiled through my teeth at him and he was looking at me like I just murdered his dog and took a shit on his bed.
"How are you doing?" He asked casually, rubbing his chin.
"I'm good and you?" I squeaked.
"Just peachy," he grinned, "you mind stepping out of the car?" He asked.
"I don't want to," I groaned and he pulled open my door for me.
I removed my seat belt and stepped out of the car. "What's your name?" He ordered. His leg fidgeted like he was in a rush.
"April," I said.
"Let me ask you something, April," he folded his arms as he looked at me, "do I look like a man that wears panties?" His face was so stern that it took everything in me not to laugh.
"No sir," I looked him over, "I don't know," I shrugged.
He let out a steady breath and motioned for me with a finger to come closer. I took a step to see my car had dented the back of his car and it looked bad.
"Do you have insurance?" He asked.
"Um not exactly," I said.
"You got to be fucking kidding me right now," he breathed out, pinching the bridge of his nose.
The man reached for his phone. "Listen please don't call the cops," I begged and he still dialled on his phone.
"I just lost my job. I will pay you for all the damages-"
"Hello," he said, keeping his eyes on me and all I could see were visions of me drinking toilet wine, I was too tiny to go to jail. I didn't want to be someone's bitch, "yeah tell dad I'm going to be late something came up," he said and hung up quickly.
I let out a breath of relief. "Where did you work before?" He asked.
"Grocery mart down the street."
He nodded, something more than curiosity was swimming in his dark blue eyes. "How do you plan on paying for this?" He stressed, looking at the back of the car.
It sounded simpler than it was. "I'll get another job."
I eyed the man up and down quickly. He looked like a male model. I assumed he was a male model. His face was shaven and he looked like the definition of male perfection. His hair was dark and his eyes looked like the waters from crater lake.
When I looked up again he was looking at me like he was plotting my murder. "What were you thinking. How do you do something so fucking moronic?"
"Excuse me," I folded my arms. "I'm sorry I smashed into your car okay. But it's done and I don't need you to tell me what a fucking moron I am buddy."
He smirked and I could tell he was mocking me. "Fuck you," I blurted and moved to get back into my car.
"Hey," he banged on my window. "Where are you going? Who is going to pay for this?"
"Santa Claus," I deadpanned, "I could give a bag of shaved dicks about your car."
I put my foot on the gas and the man took a step back as I drove away. When I looked in the rearview mirror it looked like he was laughing.
