The shame I felt as I sneaked out of the penthouse was palpable. It crawled into my skin, creeping up to my face. I’m a grown woman who can’t get ahold of her urges. How pathetic is that?If I’m going to let go of everything, I need a plan. I can’t feel anything anymore. The craving for booze and pills waned but my sexual appetite reached another level. A scary one because I only felt that. Other than lust, carnal and primal at its core, I felt nothing else. I need to feel something else. Something better.I need to fix myself. I don’t want to use Austin like that. Not anymore. We enjoyed it, oh god we did. But enough is enough. I respect the man and I don’t want to just use his body. Our relationship is worth more than that. His face this morning was the thing that propelled me to get up. There’s nothing more motivating than self-loathing. The shame, the complete humiliation of watching his gorgeous face as he realized I’d hit rock bottom, that’s something else. It made me get
I went numb. All movements halted as I processed the information he gave me. “I... I should be scared? But… what have I done?” I couldn’t believe the things he was saying. Why is he mad? I should go. I tried to get up once again. He put more weight on my twisted arm, he’s crushing me down the cushion. I felt the panic rising more and more. I wanted to scream and run hysterically but I tried to stamp it down. That won’t help me now. He’s far stronger and angrier, I don’t stand a chance if it will come to blows. One-on-one combat has never gone well for women against men. “Can you release me? You’re hurting me, Matthew.” “No. You’re just going to leave,” he said but somehow his hold eased up. “I’m not, can we just talk about this first? There’s no need to get physical.” I tried to reason with the man, the primal need to escape from danger not letting up one bit. “If you let me go, I’ll stay. I promise.” “You’re too smart for your own good but I guess we could talk.” He releas
‘Sweetheart’, the term made my skin crawl. I never knew such a word could make me want to vomit that much. Or was it just the pills he shoved down my throat? I have no idea at this point. Does it matter? I’m in deep shit. There’s no other description of the situation. I watched him as he tried to hide his triumphant smug grin. “Please…” I pleaded. “Please, what? Let you go?” he shrugged. “Can’t do that.” “Matthew…” “Hmm… I really… really like that,” he confessed. “I just love hearing it from you. Makes me so excited, you know?” I closed my eyes. Everything was spinning. I scrunched them, maybe if I will this whole thing to go away… “Look at me,” he said menacingly. “Just… don’t go away. You like to not be here, I’m fed up with that. Stay here with me, okay?” “Where do I go?” I prodded. Anything to keep him talking. He might not do anything bad if we just talk. Fat chance of that happening but I can try, can’t I? I have no other choice. “Your past. You always go back,” he sa
Olivia Sweat is dripping on the sides of my face but the cold wind is refreshing. It's not the best first impression to show up windswept but I have no choice. I pedal faster. I want to arrive a little bit earlier so I have time to freshen up, and prepare myself. Preparation is always the key, I've read that somewhere. Interviews are always nerve-wracking and this is no different. This morning is important to me. It can make or break my future plans. My savings are dwindling by the day. We'll be out on the streets if I don't land a job by this month. I've donned my best attire, especially for this appointment. I have exactly five semi-formal blouses and this is my favorite white top. My denim lucky pants and my sensible shoes, my loafers, are the only pair I have that have no holes. They're perfect when riding my trusted bike. I've had this bike since I was a teenager. I don't care what other people say, I still use it since it's better than walking. Besides, bikes are fairl
Olivia I rush towards the lady behind the solid marble counter at the entrance of Cane Industries. It's almost 10 am, I only have 2 minutes left. I'm not going to salvage any remaining kind of good impression if I don't arrive on time. I angle my injured side away from the receptionist, hoping she doesn't notice the dirt marks and blood on my outfit, and throw me out of the building before I reach my interviewer. I’m not exactly sure how many wounds I have at this point. Better to just hide my whole body under the marble counter. Placing the phone down, she mutters "What?" in my general direction. Not looking at my face but lips turned up in a sneer upon my disgruntled appearance. "I have an interview with Mr. Austin?" I almost didn't want to disturb her. "10th floor." She spits out, still not looking at me. I lift my left ankle, it's still tender. It might be sprained. I scurry towards the area of the lifts. Entering, I tuck my messenger bag on my side. Wipe my sweaty palm
Austin Cane She scrambled after me. I stepped aside so she could enter the lift. I looked up at the mirror on the side of the wall to observe the new hire. The girl is nervous. She's fidgeting with the corner of her top. "Stop squirming so much. You weren't this shy yesterday." She nods in acquiescence. Takes a deep breath and lifts up her chin. As if an automatic switch has been flipped, she straightens her posture right before my eyes. Her wavy dark hair sways down to her hip. She clutches her small notebook. I exit the lift before I notice more things about the new girl. "This side is Cane Constructions Inc. I'm expecting you to know this already since you've had an orientation regarding the companies under Cane Industries." I don't wait for a response. Entering the HR department and going straight to the manager's room, I level the woman seated at her desk with a look. "Evelyn." "Yes Mr. Cane, sir?" The HR head looks up from her laptop. Startled at my sudden appearance. E
I am mortified. It wasn't enough that Mr. Cane saw my decaying neighborhood and dilapidated house, but I think he also caught a glimpse of Augustus being his lovely self. Why did he even drive me home? Why did he insist on it even when I said no? It's just so damn annoying. Jumping off a moving vehicle is not fun at all. Yes, I'm certainly ashamed of where I live. Who wouldn't be? We aren't homeless, but Centennial and the surrounding area are something else. I don't even want to consider that he saw Augustus. Just, no. I lean on the dirty window of the bus. The muggy air wafts through my nose, public transportation from the poorest part of Portland isn't the best. Clutching my bag closer and tucking it to my side, I see that I'm near downtown. It takes me 2 buses to get to work and a long ride if it's on my bike. Unfortunately, I need to cough up the extra dollars just for these bus rides. It's so mortifying to get a ride from Mr. Cane but he isn't aware of how that helps with
Austin "No, I had no idea." I grit my teeth. "Yes, it's over." I hang up, no longer wanting to hear the disappointment in my father's voice one more second. My father is a man of few words. When he speaks, he chooses his words carefully. The reason it upsets me more whenever I hear that tinge of disappointment coloring his clipped voice. Luke Cane is a business tycoon. He built Cane Industries with his ingenious business acumen. Although one would argue that he had the fortune to rely on, I always counter that it takes so much more in order to stay afloat and even multiply that fortune. I stare at the files on my dark mahogany desk, Evelyn's testimony. Her confession did not shock me, I knew it the second I saw the look on her face when I stormed into her office. It's convenient that the new girl found a way to cement the evidence against her barring accounting documents. She found a credible witness, that carries more weight. Flicking my eyes towards the door, I picture her behi