chapter 5: Ruby Finds Out

The chaos of reunion had barely settled when a new voice came barreling down the hallway, breathless with excitement.

"AUNTYY!" Ruby Ivory called, taking the stairs two at a time before launching herself straight into Adira's arms.

"My other baby," Adira said warmly, wrapping her in a tight hug.

"I missed youu," Ruby mumbled into her shoulder.

"I missed you too, dear."

Ruby pulled back just enough to look up at her properly, something sharp and curious already flickering behind her eyes. "Aunty, did you know Lance is getting married?" she asked, breaking the hug entirely now, far too invested to stay still.

"Of course," Adira said simply. "He is marrying my son."

Ruby's mouth fell open. "MOM IS THIS TRUE?"

Lance, who had been hoping to avoid this exact conversation for at least another hour, sighed from across the room. "RUBY," he called out, already bracing himself.

Ruby ignored him entirely, practically vibrating with excitement. "OMG, AUNTY, IS HE HANDSOME?"

"He is my husband, Ruby," Lance cut in flatly, reaching over to smack her lightly on the head before she could spiral any further.

Ruby winced, an exaggerated, wounded little noise escaping her, though it did nothing to dampen her enthusiasm.

Lance groaned, dragging a hand down his face.

"He looks like your uncle," Adira whispered conspiratorially, leaning toward Ruby as if sharing classified information.

Ruby's eyes lit up like she'd just won something. Lance, predictably, did not share the sentiment.

"He i—" he started, equal parts mortified and exasperated. "RUBY, STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR BROTHER-IN-LAW."

Ruby only hummed, unbothered, clearly already constructing an entire fantasy in her head that Lance had no interest in confirming or denying.

From across the room, Megat returned at exactly the wrong or perhaps exactly the right moment. "I'm back," he announced, completely unaware of the conversation he'd just walked into.

"Uncle is really handsome," Ruby said immediately, turning her attention on him with unsettling speed.

Lance buried his face in his hands. There was simply no winning this particular battle.

Eventually, as the laughter died down and the family settled into something resembling normal conversation, Adira's attention shifted toward Lance with a softer, more genuine curiosity.

"Lance," she said, "are you ok with this marriage?"

Lance hesitated, considering the question honestly rather than just offering a polite deflection. "Uh… at first, I wasn't," he admitted, "but now I don't mind."

Adira smiled, something pleased and a little knowing in her expression. "What is your type, by the way?"

Lance thought about it for a moment. "Hmm… someone with a nice heart."

Across the table, Megat made a small, strangled noise. "Shít," he muttered under his breath, the word slipping out before he could stop it.

Lance, oblivious to whatever private panic that comment had triggered, continued without missing a beat. "Caring."

Megat said nothing this time, just sweated visibly, clearly doing some kind of mental math that wasn't adding up in his favor.

"Love me," Lance added simply, listing his preferences like a grocery list.

Megat nearly dropped his fork.

"Someone who doesn't hurt anyone," Lance finished.

Megat coughed, sharp and sudden. "We're fucked," he muttered, barely audible, though not quite quiet enough.

Lance blinked, concern immediately overriding his train of thought. "Are you ok, uncle?" he asked, leaning forward, genuinely worried now.

"I am, dear," Megat said quickly, sweat practically beading on his forehead. "Sweats"

Adira, watching her husband unravel in real time, couldn't help the small, knowing laugh that escaped her. "Lovely type… haha…" She trailed off, sweating slightly herself now, clearly aware of something Lance very much was not.

Ruby, never one to let an awkward silence pass without comment, glanced between the adults and offered a small, apologetic shrug. "Sorry, brother," she said, a faint smile tugging at her mouth despite the apology.

"Let's eat lunch," Ivan said, cutting through the tension before it could fully take root. "You guys can eat ice cream later."

"Put it in the fridge," Megat added, holding the ice cream out toward Ivan, clearly eager for any excuse to escape the conversation entirely.

Ivan eyed the offering with mild disbelief. "You have hands," he said, already walking away without taking it.

"This bas—" Megat started, indignant, though the rest of the insult died somewhere in the empty room as everyone filtered toward the dining hall.

In the dining table, the family gathered beneath chandeliers dripping gold light across an impossibly long table, the kind of room built for impressing guests rather than actual comfort. Conversation drifted easily between bites, the earlier tension softening into something warmer.

"Did you catch a cold?" came a familiar voice from somewhere nearby — directed, presumably, at Megat, who was still recovering from his earlier near-confession.

Adira, ever willing to fill any silence with information no one had asked for, leaned toward Lance with a small, proud smile. "He runs a big company," she said simply.

Lance's eyes lit up instantly, something starry and impressed flickering across his face.

"I thought he was a killer or something," Lance admitted, laughing slightly, "because of everyone's reaction."

Everyone — chokes.

The collective sound of several people simultaneously inhaling their food wrong rippled across the table.

"Wtf—" Lance managed, alarmed, "chokes" himself now too, caught off guard by the sheer synchronized panic surrounding him.

On the other side—

Far from the dining table, in a place Lance couldn't see, Elison Floris let out a single, theatrical sneeze. "Achuu~" he said, mimicking a gunshot with his fingers immediately after. "Shots"

Somewhere unseen, an unfortunate stranger collapsed dramatically. "Dies"

Back at the table, Lance, blissfully unaware of whatever had just transpired on the other side of the city, turned back to Adira with genuine gratitude.

"Thank you," he said, smiling. "Smiles Btw, what does he do?"

The question landed like a stone dropped into still water.

"Chokes," Megat managed.

"Chokes," Adira echoed.

"Chokes," Ivan added, right on cue.

"Chokes," Eira followed, not far behind.

Ruby glanced around at the wheezing chaos unfolding around her and shrugged, resigned. "Oh, looks like we all have to—" She coughed dramatically for effect. "Chokes"

Lance stared at all of them, utterly bewildered by the sudden, synchronized collapse of every adult at the table. "What the fuc—" he started, completely lost.

Whatever Adira was about to say in response hung suspended in the air, swallowed by the chaos of a family that clearly knew something Lance very much did not and judging by the look on everyone's faces, he was about to find out exactly what kind of man he'd actually agreed to marry.