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171: Camilla and Calvin
Leila was feeling strange. She had been for a long time now but couldn’t put her feelings into words. Camilla and Calvin were in their cribs, crying at the top of their lungs. But she stood over them without a care, watching spit dribble down the sides of their lips. A good mother would have rushed to help them but that was the issue. She didn’t know what was wrong with her. She couldn’t connect with her twins and she didn’t know who to tell.
The thought of hurting herself and the babies had come to her so many times. Even as she stared at them, she had this crazy thought to throw them against the wall so she could permanently end their crying. After that, she would kill herself so nobody blamed her. This time, cut deeper into her skin so she could bleed out from the wound.
Guilt came as fast as the thought left. She walked backward until her back hit the wall. She slid down to the floor and hugged her knees to her chest. Tears poured out
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