The Monster Within Me

Lyra's POV

"Cole is the heart of the Dravenford bloodline. Killing him will be the greatest revenge you can inflict upon the family that murdered your parents." Grandpa said after a long moment of silence.

His eyes darkened.

"And if fate is on your side," he whispered, "don't stop until every Dravenford who shares his bloodline has paid for what they did to your family."

Before I could ask another question, a strange heat spread through my body.

At first, it felt like a fever. Then it became unbearable.

I gasped as a sharp pain shot through my chest. My entire body stiffened, and every muscle tensed at once.

"What..." My voice trembled. "What's happening to me?"

Grandpa was already on his feet.

"It's starting." His words barely reached me before another wave of pain crashed through my body.

I screamed. It felt as though every bone inside me was being ripped apart and rebuilt at the same time. My fingers dug into the wooden floor until my nails split, but the pain only grew worse.

"Grandpa!" I cried desperately.

He hurried toward me and knelt beside me despite the chains restraining my wrists and ankles.

"Listen to me, Lyra," he said, his voice calm despite the fear in his eyes. "You have to stay calm."

"I can't!" I sobbed. "It hurts!"

"I know."

Another scream tore from my throat as my back arched violently. Something cracked inside me, then another, then dozens more until the sound echoed throughout the cabin.

"No," I cried, shaking my head. "Please make it stop."

Grandpa's eyes filled with tears.

"I wish I could."

Pain tore through my arms and shoulders as the chains rattled violently. My heart raced faster than I thought possible, and for one terrifying moment, I couldn't breathe or think. There was only pain.

"Grandpa," I whimpered. "I'm dying."

"No."

His hand gently cupped my face.

"You're not dying," he said, his voice breaking. "You're becoming who you were always meant to be."

"I don't want this!" I screamed as tears streamed down my cheeks. "I don't want to become one of them!"

"I know."

"I hate them! They killed Mom and Dad!"

"Yes." Every answer he gave only made me cry harder.

A violent spasm ripped through my body. My jaw clenched so tightly I thought it would shatter, and then something inside me moved.

Something awakened deep within me. It wasn't my heart or my lungs, but something that had been asleep my entire life. A low growl escaped my throat. I froze. That wasn't my voice.

Fear consumed me as my senses exploded all at once. The wind rustling outside, insects hidden beneath the floorboards, and the crackling fire crashed into my ears, while Grandpa’s heartbeat thundered through the cabin. Even the scent of damp earth seeping through the cracks was so overpowering it made me nauseous.

"I can't," I cried, twisting my head away as the chains prevented me from covering my ears. "Please make it stop."

Grandpa gently brushed the tears from my face.

"You can do this."

"No."

"You are stronger than you think."

"I don't want to be a monster."

His expression shattered.

"You are not a monster, Lyra."

Another cry escaped me as pressure built beneath my skin, as though something was clawing its way out from inside me. My body trembled uncontrollably, and the chains groaned under the sudden strain.

Grandpa stepped back, his eyes widening.

"It's happening," he whispered. "Your wolf is awakening."

I looked at him in complete terror.

"Help me."

He swallowed hard, his own tears threatening to fall.

"I would take this pain from you if I could," he said, his voice breaking. "But this is a journey every werewolf must survive alone."

Another agonizing scream ripped through the cabin as the full moon climbed higher into the night sky. Deep inside me, something ancient stirred, as though it had been waiting eighteen long years for this very moment.

Something inside me answered the moon with a growl that no longer sounded human.

My wolf had finally awakened.

The pain was gone, but I almost wished it had stayed because physical pain could heal, while the truth I had just heard never would.

My body felt strangely light, yet every movement felt unfamiliar, as though I had awakened inside someone else's skin.

I lay frozen on the wooden floor, afraid to move, afraid to open my eyes. Maybe if I kept them shut long enough, I would wake up. Maybe this had all been a nightmare.

The chains around my wrists and ankles no longer felt as tight, yet I couldn't bring myself to look.

Slowly, I opened my eyes. My breath caught in my throat. The first thing I saw wasn't my hands. It was a large paw resting on the wooden floor.

It was covered in thick silver fur that shimmered beneath the candlelight like moonlight woven into silk.

I froze. No... My heart pounded violently as I lifted my other foreleg. Another paw. Another coat of beautiful silver fur.

"No..."

The word never came. Instead, a frightened whine escaped my throat.

I stared down in horror.

Silver fur covered my forelegs and paws where my hands should have been. Long, razor-sharp claws extended from them, catching the flickering candlelight.

My breathing grew ragged as panic consumed me. This wasn't me. This couldn't be me. I stumbled backward, but my unfamiliar legs refused to obey me.

I crashed onto my side before scrambling upright again, struggling to balance on four legs instead of two as tears burned my eyes.

I shook my body violently, desperately trying to fling the thick fur from my body as though it were nothing more than a blanket wrapped around me.

It didn't disappear. I clawed frantically at my foreleg, trying to tear the silver fur away. Pain shot through my paw. But the fur remained.

"No..." Another broken whimper escaped my throat.

I am a monster. The words echoed inside my mind over and over again. I had become the very creature I had spent the last ten years learning to hate.

Fresh tears blurred my vision as I looked at the claws that had replaced my fingers, the fangs crowding my mouth, the ears that twitched at every tiny sound, and the thick silver fur I could feel covering every inch of me. I hated all of it. Most of all, I hated what I had become.

I wanted my hands back, my fingers, my face, my life. More than anything, I wanted all of this to disappear. I wanted to be human again.

"Lyra," Grandpa called again, his voice calm despite the sorrow etched across his face. "Look at me."

I refused. I couldn't bear for him to see me like this.

"I know what you're thinking," he said.

A low whine escaped my throat before I could stop it.

"I know you believe you've become the same creature that murdered your parents."

I squeezed my eyes shut.

Wasn't I? Everything I had sworn to destroy now belonged to me. Tears streamed down my face as another broken cry escaped my throat.

I'd rather die than live as one of them.

"I don't know how to change back," I tried to say.

But no words came out. Only another helpless whimper. Panic surged through me.

I tried again. "Grandpa..." The word never came. Only another pitiful whimper escaped my throat. My heart lurched into my throat as the terrifying truth sank in. I couldn't speak.

I couldn't even cry like a human anymore. The last piece of my humanity was gone. I had truly become one of them.

I lowered my head and sobbed, the heartbreaking cries of a frightened wolf echoing through the small cabin.

“Lyra,” Grandpa called softly, his voice filled with quiet reassurance. “You can still speak.”

I lifted my head. What?

"I know it doesn't feel like it, but you can. Stop fighting your wolf."

I stared at him in confusion.

"I..." I tried again, but another whine escaped my throat. Frustration tightened inside me.

"I don't want to!" I thought desperately.

Grandpa remained patient.

"Take a deep breath. Calm yourself. Don't think about the wolf. Think about your voice."

My breathing slowly steadied. I closed my eyes and did exactly what he said. One deep breath. Then another.

When I opened my mouth again, I whispered, "G... Grandpa..."

The word came out hoarse and uneven, but it was unmistakably human.

My own eyes widened. “I..." I gasped. "I can talk."

For the first time since I turned into a werewolf, relief flooded through me. A smile almost found its way onto my face.

Then my gaze fell to my silver paws. The smile vanished before it could fully form.

No, there was nothing to be happy about. I was still a werewolf. I lowered my head again, disgust twisting inside me.

After several long moments of silence, I slowly looked back at Grandpa.

"You..." My voice trembled. "You knew all of this."

He nodded.

"I did."

A question I hadn't dared ask finally escaped my lips.

"Does that mean..."

I swallowed hard.

"...you're a werewolf too?"

Grandpa didn't answer. Instead, he slowly rose to his feet. His expression remained calm, but there was sadness in his eyes.

"Watch carefully, Lyra."

Before I could ask what he meant, Grandpa’s body suddenly convulsed. I stumbled backward as his shoulders broadened, his muscles swelled, and the sickening crack of shifting bones echoed through the cabin.

Thick silver fur spread across his skin while his hands became razor-sharp claws and his face stretched into a powerful muzzle. Within seconds, the old man who had raised me was gone.

Standing before me was an enormous wolf.

His coat was a deep ash gray streaked with silver, worn with age yet no less magnificent. His golden eyes, calm and familiar, never left mine.

I couldn't breathe as the horrifying truth crashed over me. For ten years, I had lived with a werewolf without ever knowing, and my legs gave out beneath me.

I stared at him in disbelief, my voice trembling as I whispered, "You... you're one of them."

The great wolf lowered his head, and a heartbeat later, his body shifted once more.

Bones cracked as the fur slowly disappeared, and moments later Grandpa stood before me once more, breathing heavily from the transformation. When our eyes met, all I saw was quiet sorrow.

"Yes," he said softly.

“I always have been,” Grandpa said quietly. “You were never becoming a werewolf, Lyra. You were simply becoming who you had always been.”