003: The Survival Games

My stomach gives a sickening lurch.

Survival games? 

Hearing it being called that makes it sound worse than before. 

“I’m as scared as you look,” a female voice says, as the owner appears beside me. 

Unlike with my grumpy spirit guide, I’m not startled. In fact, I’m comforted by the knowledge that someone here shares my fear. 

I turn to see a tall, beautiful lady smiling at me. 

She stretches out a hand. “Hi, I’m soul 91. Or you can call me Liz,” she says. And then with a chuckle, she adds, “Please call me Liz.”

I guess I’m not the only one who dislikes being called a number, then. 

I raise an eyebrow as I shake her hand. Or attempt to. My hand slides right through hers. 

“Oops,” she laughs, retracting her hand. “I forgot that we still have to learn to master our states. Sorry about that.”

My brows pull together. “Our what?”

“Our states?...” she frowns. “Didn’t your spirit guide tell you about it?”

The look on my face must tell her all she needs to know, because her expression becomes pitiful. “We can change from gas-like entities to solid, like in our mortal bodies. Just like how we can turn off our thoughts from being heard out loud.” 

We can do that? 

She nods. “Yes. We can also not hear others' thoughts if we want. But we’ll have to learn first.”

I need to have a talk with the gods or whatever controls this place, to get a change of spirit guides. At the rate this is going, I might never learn to master anything. That’s if I even last here long enough to start learning. 

I open my mouth to ask a question, but before I let anything out, the voice cuts in.

“Souls, gather round. The first challenge will start now.”

Just like in the bus, I find myself in a line with other souls without even having to take a step.

“You will all be transported to the first locations for your individual challenges," he continues. “Your guides have already briefed you on everything you should expect.”

What? My guide hadn’t told me anything. I’m about to be transported to somewhere to play a game I know nothing about, other than the fact that it gets to decide my life or death. 

I turn to Liz. But she’s no longer next to me. Instead, a child who looks no more than ten years old is who I find. 

Are the people governing this place so cruel that they want a child to play their silly games too?

“I’m scared,” a small, shaky voice, belonging to the child, says. 

I try to be the big sister I never got the chance to be, and I offer a small, reassuring smile. “I’m scared, too.”

His eyes are glossy, and it looks like he’s going to cry. “I don’t want to die. Psalm said if I don’t pass, I’m going to die.”

I’m guessing Psalm is his spirit guide. I feel so bad for the poor boy; I wish he hadn't been told that. I wish that he had just died a simple death instead of having to go through this. 

Before I can make up words to comfort him, the instructive voice speaks again. “Remember, always find the light. Good luck, souls. We hope to see you in the next realm.”

As soon as he finishes, intense white light shines right into my eyes, like the one I’d seen before I’d been teleported here. 

When the light disperses, I’m no longer in the void we’d been in earlier. 

This time, I find myself in my lecture hall, where I’d been taking an anatomy test hours ago.  

I look to my right, and my best friend is next to me, answering her questions. To my left, and the guy who'd been seated on the row across mine, is there too. 

I sit quietly, my head spinning in confusion. I think, trying to figure out what just happened. Trying to understand if it was actually a prank, or a scenario my mind made up to cope with the test. 

It takes a while, but it finally dawns on me. 

It was all a dream. I fell asleep while taking the test. I never failed this test. 

I never fell into a coma. I was just… asleep.

A wave of relief washes through me, and without thinking, I hug my best friend. “I'm so glad you're here! I had the craziest dream, I–I was dead, and you weren't there, and– ” 

“What dream? You’ve been awake all this while, Nova. We got here a while ago for the test, remember?”

I frown, pulling away. “W– what do you mean? I was asleep. I died and went to this crazy place. It was dark, I had this hot guy sitting with me in a bus, and– ”

“Nova Walter,” my professor calls from the front of the class. “If you’re done with your test, please submit your answers. Talking in the test hall is not allowed.”

I blink away tears, my chest tightening. 

It was a dream. It had to be a dream. 

"Nova," Allison pokes my side, "Are you okay? You look like you're about to cry."

"I'm fine." I clean my eyes. "I – I'm just confused... what's going on?"

“A test, Nova. That’s what’s going on,” she hisses. “And you’d better start writing, else professor funny pants over there is gonna have an issue with you.”

I look toward the front, and, truly, my professor looks like he’s a second away from matching over here. 

Still, I remain unfazed. 

“This is your first challenge, Nova,” the familiar voice I’d gotten used to – not – answers, suddenly appearing on my desk. 

Startled for the third time, I yelp, almost sliding off my chair. 

“Sshh,” almost everyone in the room responds.

And from my professor, “One more disruption, Ms. Walter, and you’re done.”

I ignore him. “So you’re saying that this is the test?”

“Of course, it is,” Allison whisper-yells back. “And you’d better fucking write, if you plan on graduating this year.”

“I’m gonna, don’t worry about me,” I reply, just to pacify her. 

“It is the first test.”

Satisfied by his answer, I lean back, relaxing. “So… if this is your weird world’s test, and I don’t have to write this one, then why am I here?” I don’t ask aloud, taking advantage of his ability to hear my thoughts.

I swear he almost rolls his eyes. “You’re in the illusion realm. Nothing is real. Everything here is a test. If you want to live, you must pass every test, including the literal ones,” he answers in a bored tone, like I should’ve known this already. 

Like he had already told me about it, and I chose to forget. Like he didn’t just let me get thrown into a literal survival test without any information whatsoever. 

But in the midst of my guide-loathing, something he said strikes me. “What do you mean “including the literal ones”?”

Allison throws me a crazy look, but thankfully, doesn't say anything. 

“What do you think I mean?”

Are ghosts supposed to be sarcastic and rude? 

“I am not a ghost.” He grimaces. “Calling me that would reduce my existence to the form of a mere soul. I have never been a mortal.”

Wow. Who knew Mr. Headless Grump cared about a name so much?

“Focus on passing the test, Soul 113.” With that, he disappears to wherever he came from. 

“Hey! I thought we were on a first-name basis?!” I call after him. 

But not in my head, as I’d thought, because every head in the room turns to stare at me.

I’m not worried about them, though. This isn’t real. I just have to focus on passing a test I’d scored only one percent on before. How hard could it– 

“That’s it,” my professor declares. “Miss. Walter, turn in your paper and leave my hall.

For a second, everything around me just... freezes.

No. No. This isn’t happening. I didn’t hear him right.

"I won't repeat myself, again, Nova." 

My brain blanks. Everything he'd said – paper, leave, repeat – jumbles together with my fear, and none of it makes sense.

“WHAT?”

“I’d given you two warnings already,” he says, climbing the stairs. “You’ve disrupted this exam enough.”

By the end of his statement, he’s already snatching my papers off my desk.

He starts walking back down, and I just stand there, staring at him in shock.

I haven’t even written a single answer. I can’t fail. I don’t want to die.

Snapping out of it, I follow him as quickly as I can. “I’m sorry. J – just give me another chance.”

He ignores me.

Fuck.

I quicken my steps, meeting him in front of the classroom. “Please.”

“You exhausted all your chances, Ms. Walter. You can retake the test when you repeat this class next year.”

My ears tingle.

Next year. If I fail this, there won’t be a next year for me. Not in this world, not in my world.

 “Sir, please. I… I can’t fail.” 

“Should’ve thought of that when you refused to listen to my warnings.” He shakes his head, turning to walk away.

Out of urgency, I grab his hand without thinking. “You don’t understand, I can’t fail,” I plead. “If I fail this test, I’ll die.”

For some reason, the room erupts in laughter. Including the professor. 

What’s so funny? Is my life a joke to them?

After they’ve had a good laugh about my future, his expression turns serious. 

“Committing suicide over a test isn’t something I’d advise, Ms. Walter. A failed test isn’t the end of the world.” He shrugs my hand off him. “See you next year.”

“No, no. You can’t–”

The whole place suddenly darkens, and the atmosphere becomes thick and hazy, like there’s a cloud of smoke hanging over the lecture hall. 

Then comes the voice I’d been unknowingly dreading. “Soul 113. You have failed your test.”