14

Jennie's POV 

“Urghh” I groan as I tug the black jacket off my body.

I’m dressed in a white bodycon dress. It’s molded to my body and brings out every curve. It’s beautiful but it doesn’t feel right.

Nothing feels right for tonight’s date. I’m deliberately avoiding the dress I wore to the club where I met Professor Moreau. Just the thought of putting it on feels like an unforgivable sin. Somehow, even looking at it feels so wrong.

I run my fingers through my brown hair in frustration.

My phone is sitting on the bed with a pre-typed message. I had prepared a raincheck text ahead; it’s for just in case I actually end up having a melt down over what to wear.

JenJen:[draft]

Hey. I know you prepared for this with enthusiasm and love. I’m so sorry, but I can’t come out tonight. I don’t feel so good. Can you come home instead?

I eye the phone longingly again. I’m beyond tempted to push the send button. I just want to get this over with. I’m in no mood for pretending to be happy when my head is currently reeling with a hundred thoughts.

A knock on the door distracts me and I turn my head.

“Hold on.” I call loudly, holding my hand over my chest as I run to the door.

I’m not expecting anyone this evening, so really, I hope it’s Oliver coming home with a change in plan announcement.

When the person at the door starts to alternate between knocking on the wooden door and pressing the bell, I lose my patience.

“I said hold on, fuck,” I hiss and yank it open. The girl at the door puts her hands on her hips as she gives me an unimpressed look.

“Took you long enough, Blake,” she says sassily and I let out a loud squeal before jumping into her arms. “Cara!” I call her name with so much joy that she starts to giggle with me.

“Would you look at that. I thought you forgot all about me now that you’re a college kid,” she says and I roll my eyes before pulling her into the apartment. “I can never forget about you, Car. Oh my god, I missed you so much.” I gush.

“Yeah, you know you could have called or something,” she says and I apologize with a tight hug.

“I can’t believe you came all the way here for me.” I press my hands against my mouth with happiness. I’m in awe of her sacrifice. Coming from our city to the campus is a painfully long and uncomfortable two hours’ drive.

“I told you, I’ll always show up for you. My besties senses were tingling, and I knew I had to see you as soon as possible,” she says with a soft laugh and I squeeze her side.

“Thank you so much, Cara. You literally came at the perfect time. I’m having a life crisis,” I say with a sigh and her eyes move over my body.

“You look like you do not have a single problem in life. Damn…you look really hot.” she grins and I groan.

I briefly forgot about the wonderful date.

“I have a date with Oliver, and I don’t know what to wear.” I inform her and she shrugs. “You already look good to me,” she says as she lets out a low whistle, making me laugh.

“I’m serious, I’m in a big mess right now,” I say with desperation and she blinks.

“What’s wrong?”

“Um…remember when we went to that club?”

“Yeah. I literally took you there, honey.” she rolls her eyes playfully. “I slept with someone.” I blurt out and Cara doesn’t look as shocked as I expected she would. Instead, she nods slowly like I just said the most normal thing in the world.

“Cara, I slept with someone else and I’m still in a serious relationship with Oliver,” I say and she starts to laugh.

“Oh, you poor darling, that’s what got your panties in a bunch?”

“I mean, it’s worth feeling guilt over” I murmur and she laughs again. This time, with more volume, and I groan tiredly. “Car, it’s not funny.” I complain.

“But it is. Jennie, you did nothing wrong,” she says while laughing.

“But—”

“But shush. Jesus, Jennie. He cheated on you. You literally walked in on him with his dick buried in some other woman’s pussy,” she says bluntly and I run my fingers through my hair in an attempt to contain my frustration.

“Well, he apologized and we’re back together.” I insist and it’s Cara’s turn to groan.

“He didn’t apologize enough, if you ask me. And I’m serious, you have nothing to be guilty about.”

“But—” I start again and Cara grabs my shoulder, making me sit on the edge of the bed while glaring at me. “If you say ‘but’ one more time, I will smack the loving shit out of you,” she grumbles.

“The man I slept with is my professor,” I say and she freezes.

“What?”

“The man from that night. He’s my professor and I haven’t been able to get him out of my head. I feel fucked every time I see him, and I feel guilt every time I look at Oliver…” I stop talking so I can catch my breath.

“I see…”

“No, you don’t get it. I saw the professor today and I couldn’t stop thinking of his body pressing against mine. I’m having all those dirty thoughts while I have a boyfriend. Oh my god, I’m going to hell, aren’t I?”

“If the sex was that good and he’s not an asshole, I’d advise you to dump Ogliver’s ass and go for it,” Cara says plainly.

“I can’t do that. You know I can’t. My family depends on me.” I cover my face with my palms. I feel like I’m a second away from crying.

“You’re growing beautifully, Jen. But I'm really waiting for the day you'd start to live for yourself,” Cara says softly and our conversation gets interrupted by a call from Oliver.

“I need to finish up and join him at restaurant,” I murmur and get up from the bed.

“With or without the jacket?” I ask, turning around to show Cara the dress. “Without,” she responds in a kind voice.

She sounds soft, but I can hear the disappointment in her tone.

I can’t live for me. I’m not allowed to. It’s better for everyone else if I choose the safest option.

Oliver Ross.