The Whisper Of A Frozen Heart

That word alone “manipulate” made me cringe. Lucian bringing my mother into this topic was just to make me feel bad. Since coming into existence and into this Raven pack my mom has been disliked because she was a normal human being and rumor said she forced herself on my father that it was never the choice of the moon goddess and that made my father being disqualified to be the alpha of Raven pack.

 Everyone in the pack looked at her like she was a parasite that had crawled into the royal bloodline and ruined it. Lucian saying that I was trying to manipulate him was him telling me that I was stooping low just like my mom just to get the Luna seat. It was a slap in the face. He was comparing my successful life and my honest feelings to the desperate games of a woman who never understood what it meant to belong to the wolf world.

“Lucian, my mom has nothing to do with this,” I said calmly, even though my heart was hammering against my ribs. My mother is a power hungry human, I knew that better than anyone, but what I want to share with Lucian is something more than love. It is a soul deep connection that she could never understand. I didn't work my fingers to the bone building Sterling Atelier just to come back here and play dress up as a Luna. I was already a queen in the human world. I didn't need his title, but I did need him.

Lucian smiled. It was a cold and mocking twist of his lips that didn't reach his eyes. I know he saw my face cringed and oh yes his words hit me badly but he won't see my tears. I had learned a long time ago that in this pack, tears were just blood in the water for the sharks. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me break.

I stood up from the bed, my movements slow and deliberate. I let the silk sheet drop down from my body, revealing my bare breast and my black pants. Lucian is my mate so my body is his and no need of hiding it. I wanted him to see what he was rejecting. I wanted him to see that I wasn't a child anymore, and I wasn't a ghost. I was a woman of flesh and bone, marked by the same goddess he claimed to serve.

The room was silent, the only sound was the heavy thud of my heart. I started to walk toward the bathroom, intending to wash the scent of the night off my skin, but as I was about to brush past him, Lucian held me by my hand. The contact was like an electric shock. A spark of heat traveled from his palm straight to my core, making my breath hitch.

I felt a slight urge to move a bit closer to him, to let the bond pull us together until there was no space left between us. He drew me back with a jerk, his grip tight and demanding. I looked at his face and saw the struggle written in every line. His Adam's apple was moving up and down as he swallowed hard, and his breathing had changed immediately. It was heavy and ragged, the sound of a man trying to stay underwater while his lungs were screaming for air.

“Sophia,” he said, his voice sounding like it was being dragged over broken glass. His eyes were darting around, trying to avoid my gaze, looking at the wall, the floor, the ceiling, anywhere but at my exposed skin. “This room is my room. Don’t dare come in here again because I won’t take it gently with you.”

He gritted his teeth so hard I thought they might shatter. I didn't know if it was out of anger or if he was avoiding something deeper. Maybe he was afraid that if he looked too long, he wouldn't be able to stop himself. Maybe he was realizing that the hate he had nurtured for fifteen years was starting to melt under the heat of the bond.

I giggled softly, the sound light and teasing in the heavy air of the chamber. I stepped into his space, forcing him to acknowledge me. I tried locking my eyes with him but he was avoiding it like I was the sun and he was a man who had lived in the dark for too long.

“Sorry Lucian, are you avoiding me? No, are you avoiding your mate?” I asked.

The moment the word mate left my lips, the air in the room shifted. It became charged, dangerous, and wild. Immediately I felt a sharp pain in my hand. It was Lucian. His fingers had already dipped into my skin, his claws threatening to break the surface. He pushed me so fast that my back hit the wall with a loud thud.

The impact jarred my bones, but there was no pain in my heart. Maybe it was because I felt that maybe he should pour his anger out on me. If he hurt me, maybe he would finally see me. If he broke my body, maybe he would stop trying to break my spirit. I stared up at him, my hair fanning out against the cold stone, my chest rising and falling with the adrenaline.

He had already released his grasp on me as his fist slammed into the wall right above my head. The stone cracked under the force of his blow, and dust drifted down onto my shoulders. He was looming over me, his massive body casting a shadow that swallowed me whole.

“You dare not mention mate, when I’m with you alone!” he roared. His face was inches from mine, and I could feel the heat radiating off him like a furnace.

I looked at him, but I didn't see the monster he wanted me to see. I could only see a boy hiding from something he felt might kill him. He was terrified of the bond. He was terrified that if he accepted me, he would be betraying his father's memory. He was trapped in a prison of his own making, and I was the only one who had the key.

I looked him in his eyes that had already turned golden. The wolf was there, right at the surface, staring at me with a hunger that was ancient and raw.

I want your Wolf Lucian. I want your Wolf to talk to me because the man is too stubborn to listen to the truth. I want the part of you that doesn't care about last names or old blood feuds.

“What will happen if I call you my mate, Lucian?” I said just like a whisper. My voice was soft, like a caress, drifting between us in the tiny space he had left me. I didn't need to be scared of Lucian. I never forced the union, it was blessed by the moon goddess herself. I have my right to have him. I am his Luna, his equal, his destiny.

I could see the golden light in his eyes flickering, his pupils blowing wide until there was almost no gold left, only the dark abyss of his wolf’s soul. He looked like he wanted to devour me and destroy me all at once. The tension was a living thing now, a cord stretched so tight it was humming.

But immediately my thoughts were disrupted as I felt my neck being wrapped by Lucian’s hand. He didn't squeeze, but the weight of his palm against my throat was a heavy reminder of his power. I didn't flinch. I just stared at him calmly, my eyes searching his, waiting for the storm to break.

He leaned in, his body pressing me firmly against the wall until I could feel every hard muscle of his chest against my skin. His heartbeat was a frantic, wild rhythm that matched my own. Immediately I felt it, his breath was hiked as his nose pressed on my nose. Our breathing collided together, mixing in the hot, stagnant air of the room. He was trembling, a fine shake that told me he was right on the edge of losing control.

The silence of the room was deafening, filled only with the sound of our shared air. He looked at my lips, then back at my eyes, his expression a tortured mix of desire and loathing. He was a man drowning in his own skin, and I was the only thing keeping him afloat.

One word dropped from his mouth while it brushed my lips like a fire.

“Sophia”