chapter 36

EZRA

I shouldn't be here.

I'm not good with hospitals. I'm even worse with kids. And yet, here I am—in the parking lot, engine off, fingers clenched around the wheel like they might stop me from doing something stupid.

Like getting out.

Like going in.

Like asking to see her son. And her.

The afternoon sun pours through the windshield, too warm for comfort, but it’s not the heat making my skin itch. It’s the waiting. The not knowing. The tight rope of restlessness twisting in my gut since she walked into my office with a letter that felt like a stake to the chest.

Resignation.

Just one word. But it cracked something open.

I could’ve let her go. Should’ve. God knows I’ve pushed her enough. But peace won't come. I already knew it yesterday when I tried to drown in paperwork to fill her absence. The silence was very loud.

But she always filled the silence anyway. Like a song I couldn’t stop hearing.

Even now, I tell myself it’s not about her. That it’s about control. Power. Damage control. That I only followed Sebastian’s cab because I needed answers.

I inhale deeply before turning to the hospital's entrance for the umpteenth time.

Then, I see her step out through the hospital doors, eyes tired, hair a bit messy, arms folded like she’s holding herself together—something inside me splinters.

And I know.

I know it was always about her.

I open the car door and step into the sun.

The old stories say vampires burn in daylight.

But that’s a myth we let humans believe. A lie we gave them to feel safe.

The truth is, monsters like us can stand in the sun just fine. When we still coexisted with humans, we just wanted them to believe that they have something over us.

Her eyes land on me and she halts in her steps.

Then, she starts again—faster, harder, heels stabbing the ground, jaw clenched, blazing with fury.

She’s coming for me.

Fuck. She looks cute when she's angry.

And since her anger is directed at me, it means she still feels something. Even if it’s hate, I’ll take it. I’ve handled worse than her wrath. 

She stops in front of me, close enough that I can smell her—hospital air, stress, that faint vanilla she always wears.

Her voice trembles. “What the hell are you doing here?”

I stay silent.

Because I don’t know what to say. 

She shoves at my chest— but I don't budge. Her mild shove is not enough to move me, just enough to bleed out the emotion clinging to her like fog. “You don’t get to be here, Ezra. You don’t get to follow me and act like this is your life too.”

I flinch. It sounds... predatory. Which is funny, because that’s exactly what I did. No shame left to pretend otherwise.

“I didn’t mean—” I start, but she’s not done.

“It’s because of you that I’m losing him!” Her voice cracks, and I almost lose it right there. “Sebastian’s using you against me. Your name. Your image. Your... your gaze in those stupid pictures!”

She wipes a tear angrily.

I want to do it for her. I want to touch her. Maybe fix her. But everything I touch always ends up ruined. I'm a master at ruining beautiful things. But even with that, I still want her. 

And… I’m the reason she’s breaking.

“He’s not going to give Finn back,” she whispers. “Not unless I crawl back to him and stay in that house that broke me. And you… you showing up here only makes it worse.”

She turns, like she’s about to walk away, and I grab her wrist.

I don't even know why I did that.

Let go. I tell myself. But I don't.

She's like a magnet and I'm like metal. She's like fire, and I'm the moth. And in reality, she's blood. And I'm a vampire.

I will stay even if I get ruined. Even if I'll probably ruin her too. It'll be a sweet destruction. 

Why am I even thinking like this?

Maybe because I haven't drank her blood from her pulse yet. Or maybe because I haven't shoved my cock in her pussy. Because I haven't have her in every way humanly possible. Haven't made her smile. Haven't held her son. Haven't woken up with her by my side.

Maybe because I'm thirsty. And I know that a gulp from her won't be enough to satiate me because if it will, the one I had from her cunt would have been enough and I wouldn't be thirsty.

Maybe it's because I'm very sure she's an Aureate. And one day, she'd find out I'm a vampire.

And if I don't get to ruin the both of us in a sweet way, one of the other three fuckers would have her. The vampire council could even destroy her so she won't be our destruction.

And I don't care if at the end of everything, I'll end up a madman like Malik, or even worse.

But I want her. I really do.

And I don't care if my immortal self have to fall on my knees just to beg her, to wipe her tears. 

I want Thea Carlisle even if it destroys me. Even if it destroys the both of us.

Call me selfish.

She looks back at me, eyes glassy and sharp. “Let go.”

I don't.

Even if it'll make me the villain in her story.

“I didn’t mean to make things worse,” I say quietly.

“Then what did you mean to do?” she snaps, still in my grip. “Were you going to come in and pat his head? Be the hero in the picture while I lose everything?”

“No.”

“Then why, Ezra?”

I pause. Let the lie bubble up—and then kill it.

“I didn’t want you to leave.”

She blinks. Her lips part. Then she presses those luscious lips in a thin line.

I continue, voice low, barely mine, “You handed me that letter like it was nothing. Like you were ready to disappear. I didn’t know what else to do. So I followed you.”

She exhales a shaky breath. “You could’ve just let me go.”

“Yeah,” I say. “I could’ve. But I can't.”

I slowly release my grip on her and shove my hands in my pockets.

Her shoulders slump. Just a little.

And then, she asks in a soft voice, “Some days, you act like the devil incarnation and some days, you act like a soft plushie. Why suddenly do you care so much?”

I want to say I don’t.

That she’s just an employee. Just a talented woman in a long line of talent I’ve hired and fired.

“Because…” I wander off.

She crosses her arm over her chest, waiting, her face looks like she's expecting a lie.

I gulp. ”Because—”

“You know what? Cut it out. I don't want to hear anymore.”

My jaw tightens.

She turns her back to me.

“Get out of here Ezra. I don't want to see you. Your presence here will only be a disadvantage to me. I still want to win back Finn's custody.”

“I can help you with that.” I blurt.

She freezes. Then slowly turns.

Her voice drips with suspicion. “And how exactly do you intend to do that? With your money?”

Smart girl.

A smirk tugs at the corner of my mouth, but I don’t let it bloom fully. She thinks this is about bank accounts alone. If only she knew.

“Not really,” I say, low and calm. “I have… another way if that doesn't work.”

She squints at me. “And what would that cost me?”

There it is.

Smart. Guarded. Transactional.

I take a step forward.

She immediately steps back—but I don’t stop.

Another step. Then another.

She keeps moving until her spine meets metal. The car behind her groans quietly, but she doesn’t look away from me.

Good. I don’t want her to.

I brace my palm flat beside her head, caging her in. 

“What do you want?” she asks, and her voice trembles just enough to betray her heartbeat.

I lower my face, nose grazing hers. My lips are close enough to kiss her, close enough to taste the emotion bleeding off her skin.

“You,” I whisper.

Her eyes flicker.

I continue, slow and deliberate. “All of you. Your heart. Your lips. Your cunt. Your blood.”

She stiffens. Her eyes widen—huge and uncertain—and I see it: the reflection of myself in her irises. And in that reflection, my eyes are no longer human.

They glow red.

Fuck.

She sees it.

Her breath catches. Her voice is barely a whisper as her eyes search mine. “What… what are you?”

I hold her gaze and chew the insides of my mouth. 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

No more games. No more half-truths.

I pull back.

“A vampire,” I say.

And I wait for her to run. Or scream. Or slap me.

But she doesn’t.

She just stares at me like the ground underneath her is no longer trustworthy, like she’s falling and hasn’t quite decided whether she should be terrified or aroused.

I don't move.

Neither does she.

She swallows hard and lets out a nervous chuckle. “That’s not funny.”

I let the silence draw on for a while longer.

“I’m not joking,” I murmur. “And I’m not asking for your trust. Just your choice.”

I lean in again, lowering my voice to a breath. “Let me help you, Thea. Let me destroy him for what he did. Let me give you your son back.”

“And in return, you'll let me have you.”