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235: On your knees
publish date:
2026-08-27 23:49:29
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My Enemy [BL] 259: Thank you, Julian
ELLISWhen Doctor Morgan finally showed up to say I could see my dad, I felt like I’d aged about forty-seven years in that morning.I’d spent hours stuck in a hospital chair that seemed designed for maximum discomfort...hard plastic with zero support or dignity, just staring at a blank wall while nurses and doctors bustled around.Every few minutes, someone would pass by with a clipboard, slip through some double doors, or murmur to a colleague, and each time my stomach would knot up, convinced they were discussing my father’s condition.Julian had stayed right there with me through it all.He didn’t fill the silence with useless reassurances, which I found more comforting than I could say.He understood not to say everything would be fine when neither of us really knew.Instead, he was just present, occasionally offering me water, reminding me to eat something when I could, and holding my hand whenever he noticed my fingers were trembling.At some point, I stopped pretending I was ok
My Enemy [BL] 258: I know
ELLIS The words slipped out so softly I almost didn’t hear myself, barely more than a breath against his shirt. Julian tightened his arm around me. "I know." "I know he’s been sick for years, but..." I swallowed. "I think I always believed he’d just keep getting better." Julian remained silent, giving me room to keep talking. "I’ve been so focused on bills and medication that I forgot it was possible that one day..." My voice faltered. "One day I might not be able to fix it." "You can’t fix everything." I stared at the cabin floor, observing the soft grain of the wood beneath my feet. "But if I can’t fix this, who will?" Julian looked down at me, his expression steady and certain. "You don’t have to do it alone." I swallowed hard. Something about that sentence settled inside me, easing a small part of the panic that had been clawing at my heart since the phone call. By the time we rolled up to the hospital, it was well close to dawn...the moment I stepped in
My Enemy [BL] 257: Might die III
ELLISIt was so typical of him that I wanted to scream.Instead, I raked my hands through my hair, gripping it like that might somehow keep my thoughts from swirling away completely. "God, I hate this shit."Julian’s expression softened."I know."I glanced at him.There was something in the way he said it that tightened my chest, a quiet certainty that didn’t try to gloss over what was happening or make it smaller than it was.He didn’t tell me not to worry.He didn’t promise everything would be alright.He didn’t give me one of those empty reassurances people offer when they’re uncomfortable with someone else’s suffering.He simply stood there, allowing the weight of it to exist between us without attempting to diminish it.And that somehow made it better.I looked away before I could feel the sting in my eyes again."Can you pack the rest?""Sure."I zipped up my suitcase, the sound feeling oddly final in the stillness of the room.For a moment, neither of us moved.Outside, the oc
My Enemy [BL] 256: Might die II
ELLISI had hardly taken three steps into the bedroom when it hit me: I had no clue what I was doing.There I stood in the center of the room, staring at our luggage as if it had personally offended me.Our clothes were strewn about from the week we’d spent on the island, most still neatly folded because, apparently, Julian had this superhuman ability to unpack without creating the chaos that I usually considered organization.My suitcase lay open next to the wardrobe, half-filled with clothes I had hastily thrown in at the trip’s start, convinced that packing for a private island was just like packing for a weekend at your average family home.Turns out, I was dead wrong...very wrong.I grabbed the first shirt I could find, a soft cotton number still carrying a hint of sunscreen and saltwater, a reminder of a different kind of evening that was now just a memory.Then I froze.Why was I even standing there, thinking about shirts?My dad was in the hospital.My dad needed surgery.My d
My Enemy [BL] 255: Might die
ELLIS"We haven’t had the conversation yet.""Exactly."Then his expression changed slightly, the amusement faded.He looked at me more carefully, all the teasing dropping away like a curtain pulled back."You’re really are nervous."I swallowed, giving up denial. "Yeah.""Why?"I stared at him.Because I loved him.Because I’d spent the entire week imagining how I’d say it. Because I was terrified he’d laugh, or worse, that he’d go quiet in that unreadable way of his and I’d spend the rest of the night trying to interpret it.Because I’d never felt anything like this before. Because somehow the man sitting across from me had become the person I wanted to tell everything to, even the things I usually kept locked away where nobody could use them against me.I opened my mouth. "Julian, I..."My phone rang, I nearly jumped the hell out of my chair.Oh, c’mon what now?!The sudden sound cut through the quiet music and the sound of the waves, jarring and out of place against the candleligh
My Enemy [BL] 254: Don't call me cute
ELLISA week.That was how long we had been on the island, which was long enough for me to develop several concerning habits, including sleeping until I felt like waking up, eating food I couldn’t pronounce, and expecting someone to appear whenever I became mildly inconvenienced.I had also developed a dangerous attachment to the ocean. More specifically, I had developed an attachment to sitting beside it while somebody else did all the work.I still wasn’t convinced swimming was necessary.I had nearly drowned once, and I felt that should count as a perfectly reasonable reason to retire from aquatic activities permanently.Julian disagreed. He had spent the past week trying to convince me that I could, in fact, learn how to swim if I stopped behaving like the ocean had personally insulted me.I maintained that the ocean had done nothing to earn my trust, and that until it apologized, we were simply going to coexist from a respectful distance.The week itself had passed far too quickl
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