第7章

Elena's POV

The day I left for the North happened to be the day of Cassian and Sophia's wedding.

When I woke that morning, the sky over the vampire world was as overcast as ever, but the bustle in the streets was unlike any ordinary day.

Carriages streamed past in the distance, the flower shops on both sides of the road had been nearly emptied, and even the maids at home couldn't help whispering that the Vale family had reserved the entire cathedral for the ceremony.

I sat by the window and had the last trunk loaded onto the carriage.

Nora fastened my cloak and asked quietly,

"My lady, would you like to leave a little later?"

I looked at her.

"Why?"

She clearly hadn't expected the question.

"Today..."

She didn't finish.

I knew what she wanted to say.

Today was Cassian's wedding.

But that had nothing to do with me anymore.

"The waystations on the northern road have already been arranged. There's no reason to change plans at the last minute."

Nora lowered her head.

"Yes, my lady."

By the time I came downstairs, my father was already standing by the door.

He hadn't gone to the wedding.

The invitation had arrived days ago, but he had simply sent a gift in his place.

I walked up to him.

"Father."

My father looked at me, then at the carriage behind me.

He had stopped asking about Cassian some time ago.

At first, he still tried to get me to tell him what I really thought.

Eventually, he must have realized I truly wasn't going to turn back.

I hadn't always been like this.

Everyone in the household knew I liked Cassian.

After the engagement, I would spend ages choosing a gown before banquets, just because I wanted him to notice me.

When Cassian said, even once, that a particular dress looked nice, I would be happy for days.

Even when he was cold, I always found excuses for him.

He was too busy.

He wasn't good at expressing himself.

We hadn't known each other long enough.

And feelings could always develop over time.

When my father frowned, I would defend Cassian.

Later, after the incident with Sophia, my anxiety took over, and I started explaining myself in fits of near hysteria.

Even when no one was asking, I couldn't stop bringing up what happened that night.

I was afraid they all thought I was lying.

Afraid Cassian would truly despise me.

My father saw it all but could do nothing.

When I refused to let go, no one could pull me back.

Now, I was finally willing to let it all go.

My father was quiet for a long time. In the end, he said only,

"Leaving might be for the best."

I looked at him.

He reached over and pulled the collar of my cloak a little tighter.

"The North is far, and the road isn't safe.

"Write to me when you arrive.

"If anything happens, don't try to handle it on your own."

I nodded.

"I will."

My father looked at me for a moment longer.

"Be safe."

This time, I managed a smile.

"I know."

He didn't say anything else.

When the carriage began to move, I looked out the window and saw my father still standing in the same spot.

His figure grew smaller and smaller until the gates of the house disappeared from view.

I leaned back in my seat.

My heart felt unexpectedly quiet.

In my previous life, my father could only watch as I trapped myself, little by little, for Cassian's sake.

This time, he wouldn't have to watch me agonize over that man anymore.

When the carriage passed through the main city, bells began to ring in the distance.

One after another.

I listened for a while before I realized what they were. The wedding ceremony must have begun.

Nora sat across from me, sneaking a careful glance.

"My lady..."

I lifted the curtain and looked outside.

People in the streets were walking toward the cathedral.

Some carried flowers.

Children chased after a lavishly decorated carriage.

It was lively.

I watched for a moment, then let the curtain fall.

"How far can we get by tonight?"

Nora blinked.

"What?"

"If we don't stop along the way."

She quickly pulled out the travel itinerary.

"We should make it to Roth Waystation, south of here.

"We can continue north tomorrow."

I nodded.

"Then let's try to get there."

"Yes, my lady."

She let out a quiet breath of relief.

I said nothing more.

The bells were still ringing.

In my previous life, I had heard bells like these at my own wedding to Cassian.

My palms had been slick with sweat that day.

I kept touching my ring, asking Nora if my veil was straight.

I had thought that was the luckiest day of my life.

I was finally marrying the man I loved.

Even if Cassian didn't love me, I told myself it didn't matter.

We still had a long time.

But those five short years of marriage were enough to drain every last drop of hope.

In this life, the bride in the cathedral was Sophia.

Cassian was finally marrying the woman he wanted.

And I didn't feel cheated.

My heart didn't even ache the way I had imagined it would.

Maybe I was simply too exhausted.

Some things had already been grieved too many times in another life.

I didn't want to go through it all again.

The carriage rolled past the city limits.

The bells faded into the distance.

I didn't look back.