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20. Mireille
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Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 21. Cal
I didn’t get a minute of sleep. My mind swung between lustful thoughts of Hope and rage-filled terrors of ripping the blonde, leaden lump Ervin to shreds. I am not fit to be underground during the full moon, it turns me into a deranged pendulum of emotions.When Hope said Ervin had a skeleton key my stomach sank, replaced by fury. Quelling the anger bubbling away inside is a losing battle. How dare he approach her like that. I’m doing my level best to not ruin everything for her. Holier-than-thou light worshipping little bastard he is. He's a fucking fraud.My hands are burned on the silver bars half a dozen more times during the night as I pace the floor. The snacks and books I snuck in don’t even get looked at. It is impossible to concentrate on anything other than Hope.I need unlocking, I need to sprint to her room and make sure, now the full moon has ebbed away that she is safe. I have control of myself again, my wolf has simmered back down to merely being infatuated. I can be
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 22. Hope
After Vera interrupted my shower during the full moon, I hid. I locked my door until hunger made me roam the empty corridors late at night. I don't want to see her, or anyone, really. Her threats replay in my head.She knows I’ve been to see Sol. I should tell Elvie what I’ve discovered. But then Vera will just wreck my life with rumours about Cal. Rumours that are inches away from being true.I pace the room, despising every single beige tone. Everything here is designed to make me relax. It just increases my irritation. I want something to smash, but there is nothing worth hurling.Out of options, I head to the little library. Numbly, dressed in only my little pyjama shirt and shorts, I start work on a new portrait. It’s not my mother, though. Soft brown curls tumbling over a broad, strong forehead, barely reaching a pair of dark eyebrows.A firm jaw, one I had thought too severe at first. Or too cocky, but now only looks handsome in my eyes. Like it needs my hand placing against
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 23. Mireille
I spend a pointless few weeks after the second full moon trying to read the outlines of various men’s chests under their clothing. The darkness of my dreams allowed me to relive the sensation of his kiss. How the huge, warm frame of the man inside me tensed before finally relaxing and returning my affection with hot, hungry passion. Unfortunately, just like my dreams, I still woke up alone and clueless. Disappearing into the dark as before, he tapped me three times before vanishing. Too strong for me to hold onto as much as I tried.There isn't much else to do, but daydream now, the boiler is safe. Might as well try and rule out some of the men it can’t be. I had thought the tension would wind down after the full moon, but it’s still there. Conversations are stilted, friendships being tested. I’ve walked past two more brawls in the past week. Fingers are being chopped off by Raze for multiple offences. Raze appears to have relaxed the ban on moonshine, though, judging by the stench
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 24. Cal
The third full moon has landed. For once I have my emotions in check. I’ve been drinking that vile tea since the lights came on for breakfast. I’m not being locked up again.“Looks like you’re afraid of not controlling yourself Cal,” Vera purred, taking a seat opposite me. I grimaced and placed the half-empty cup back on the table. She sat, passing me a bowl of porridge and dried fruit she’d decided to fetch me. I didn’t ask for it. When I didn’t answer, she batted her eyelashes and topped up her flirting with, "Wouldn't have thought that was an issue for you.""Thank you for the food." Is the best reply I can muster.I’ll never eat a fucking sultana again after this winter. They’re never-ending down here. I want fresh fish, caught by my own hand but too much of that thinking will leave me frustrated. Tonight I am calm. Placid. In control.“Hey, you okay, seem a bit out of it over there?” Vera smiles, placing her small hand on top of mine. I try not to flinch away, I still need her
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 25. Hope
I had my big cry a month ago. I let everything out on that library floor until my eyes hurt and throat stung. Then I packed all the hurt away. In the same way I don’t allow myself to think about my mother’s horrific passing too much. I box it up. Keep going.I haven’t forgotten her, I just can’t look inside that brain-box and handle the wealth of emotions that will fly at me. It’s too much. Especially down here. Plus, since Cal was locked up. I know the other pilgrims are treating me differently. I think they see his reformation of character into Ervin’s bestie as getting himself away from trouble. Namely me. Like I'm his downfall when he was so very nearly mine.Alongside that, Vera is so fake it makes me want to pull those blonde ringlets straight off her head."Hey if you want to work out with us you're so welcome!""Hope you look so rustic with your hair like that!""Cal you're so funny! Hope did you know Cal was such a tease?"Spare me.But my Papa is so happy. He’s eating, dri
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 26. Cal
I will take ten rounds of running into gunfire over forcing those words out again. I don’t do that kind of thing. Girls come to me. That’s how the game plays out normally. Alpha energy and all that.But Hope? I’ll crawl over broken glass. I’ll beg. I don’t care as long as she doesn’t run from this moment. Rocking a charcoal smudge on her forehead, copper wisps of hair curling about her face, Hope has a terrifyingly tight hold over me. As soon as Reu left, I knew what I wanted. My rehearsals for our conversation were, of course, rendered irrelevant immediately. It wasn't meant to be in the cell. It should have been the library. I should have said how beautiful she looked, but I accidentally insulted her.Prickly, stubborn, refusing to yield. I’m surrounded by landmines, every sentence a disaster. But I can see her eyes glowing with pink shards. Even if she won’t admit it to herself, her wolf is charging forward. Her pear and freesia arousal cloaks my brain, weakening my vocabulary t
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 27. Mireille
After the riots, there was no exciting build-up to this full moon. Everything was tense, way too quiet. Just one spark of disagreement could set the whole thing off again. Men who had acted like brothers now cut each other dead in corridors. Nobody cleaned the dried blood outside my room. Burgundy handprints swiping down, men still limping around on makeshift crutches.Waking up to another piece of paper under my door didn’t help. ‘I AM WATCHING, MY ANGEL, DO NOT FORGET’ in a ragged, cursive script. Who the hell thinks I’m their angel? What are they watching anyway. Me being terrified. Or perhaps they didn't like Cyrus in my room. Or maybe it's Cyrus disliking Raze’s interest in me.It seems others are receiving notes. Maybe this letter writer is just out to gaslight us all for some ulterior motive. It’s gameplay at it’s cruellest. I don’t want it to be the hazel-eyed Cyrus, but he’s the most mysterious. Perhaps he has the opportunity? Worryingly, the new writing is too jagged to
Night of the Rogues: Bound In Darkness 28. Cyrus
This is a complete and utter fuck up. She was never meant to know it was me. I took one too many chances.I’ve done my best to keep my distance. Followed every order. Allowed the other Rogues to form their own impression of me. It’s mostly wrong, but not all of it. I am dangerous. Too much of me is tainted to ever be made into a good man. So why did I follow her when she placed her hand in mine? My brain tells me I need to work out who sabotaged the lights first. Make my excuses and leave. Except all I can see is Mireille. I’ve adored her body enough in the dark to form an image in my head for when I stand alone in silence. Her bare, womanly shape was more enticing and beautiful than I’d dared to imagine, except she’s covered in blood. Blood I spilled, a painfully familiar sight.Ryan and Sven, have I killed them? Do I even care considering how they were behaving? Not really. She opens her door and guides me back into her tiny little room. “Come in,” she whispers, the slight trem
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