Tiny little tingles

A shot of pain darts through my abdomen. Usually I could stretch my fingers out and look for comfort and sympathy. I steady my eyes in the dark and indeed find myself alone. I turn to my nightstand and pull out his sweater, his sweet smell still lingering on the material.

I find myself dancing with the idea. Should I reach out and just tell him we miss him? I shake the thought away. I promised myself I would not make contact. He knows where we are and he knows what a huge hole he has left behind.

I must have dozed off because I find myself being violently shaken awake.

“Mom, Mom, Mom, you never sleep in. Who is going to make our breakfast?”

The sheets feel so warm and comfortable, yet I manage to stumble out of bed. “I am coming, Jocie. Will you put the toast in for now and turn on the kettle?”

My words have barely left my mouth and the little body is already darting away. That is not a good sign. I was hoping to buy some time, but at that speed she is going to have the toast buttered and the water boiled before I brush my teeth.

I look at the clock. Unbelievable. It is only 5:15.

“Joce, it is still so early. How could you wake me so soon?”

No answer. Only Timothy walking in, as frazzled and sleepy as I felt ten seconds ago. He taps my belly. “Morning, bro. Are these ladies also giving you a hard time?”

I love it when he talks to my belly. I think he is going to enjoy having a little brother.

“Tim, you can lie down in my bed. You still technically have half an hour.”

We both jump for a second when out of nowhere we hear a forbidding screech.

“Have you forgotten? You guys said you were going to be there for me while I train to run. Mom was going to drive her car beside me and you were going to ride your bicycle. This is serious. I want to break my record.”

Timothy looks up at me with newfound inspiration. “Mom, come on.”

I head to the kitchen, annoyed that I do not have time to make my bed. I hate leaving my room in a state.

“Okay, Jocie. Now that I am on the same page as you, I do not think it is a good idea to eat too much. Neither of you should. Let me make you two a protein shake. That new one that Doctor Heyes suggested.”

Jocelyn stops in her tracks. “Fine, Mom. I am just going to put on my shoes.”

It is the first time for many things in this house, but shaking a protein drink and heading out to support my daughter while she trains feels monumental. She was just a baby a few days ago. Never mind Timothy, who seems to be keeping up with everything.

Then a sudden panic hits me. Is this all too good to be true? How are we moving on so smoothly despite all the uncertainty around us?

That reminds me. Let me check my day. I am sure today is the day I need to see the lawyers.

“Mom, you can check your diary later. Let’s go!”

Goodness. That whole story about girls not being as energetic as boys, at what age does it start? Because I cannot keep up with my girl.

Then I feel the little fella moving. It is always a sweet reassurance.

I grab my keys. I get my earphones. I pick up the two tumblers with their shakes.

Good. We are ready to go.