LOGINDuring the groom's challenges at my house on my wedding day, my best friend, Lexie Powell, suddenly pulls out a coin. "Heads or tails? Guess wrong, and the wedding is off." Ignoring my attempts to stop him, my fiance, Elliot Stewart, responds with absolute confidence, "Heads." Lexie bursts into laughter and opens her hand to show the tails side of the coin. "Looks like today isn't the day after all. Party's over, everyone." The room freezes, and the air turns dead silent. Elliot fondly ruffles her hair. "A deal's a deal. No worries. We can always reschedule." Ignoring my pleading look, he scoops Lexie into his arms and walks toward the door. "I told you not to wear high heels. What if you fall?" Lexie playfully punches his chest, blushing. "Are you stupid? You pick heads every single time, and you lose every single time." This isn't his first time guessing wrong. He guessed wrong on Valentine's Day, giving our reserved candlelight dinner to Lexie and leaving me to walk home alone. He guessed wrong when meeting my parents, leaving them waiting all night while he took Lexie to a private cinema. He guessed wrong for our trip, rescheduling the flights last minute to take Lexie on a romantic getaway to an island instead. Even at our wedding, they have to play their coin-tossing game without a care for anyone else. The coin rolls over to my feet. Only then do I finally see that both sides are tails. I clench my fists. I'm done with a relationship that's rigged for me to lose.
View More오후 여섯 시.
양재천 위로 겨울 해가 서서히 내려앉고 있었다.
안미래는 아늑한 안방 거실 창가에 가만히 서 있었다. 커다란 통창 너머로 길게 흐르는 양재천 수면 위에서 말랑한 핑크빛 노을이 반짝이며 잘게 부서졌다. 그 너머로 낮게 깔린 도곡동의 스카이라인이 오늘따라 유난히 포근해 보였다.
처음 이 집으로 이사 왔을 때, 사람들은 뉴욕 센트럴파크 뷰가 부럽지 않다며 감탄했었다. 그때마다 미래는 그저 수줍게 웃었다.
하지만 이제는 매일 마주하는 익숙하고 덤덤한 배경일 뿐이었다.
아무리 아름다운 풍경도 마음이 외로우면, 그저 쓸쓸한 그림처럼 다가오는 법이니까.
미래는 조용히 드레스룸으로 들어가 은은한 진주 빛깔의 셀린느 실크 블라우스를 꺼냈다. 옷걸이에서 내리는 순간, 차갑고 부드러운 천이 가느다란 손가락 사이로 사르륵 흘러내렸다.
미래는 블라우스 안으로 천천히 몸을 밀어 넣었다.
실크는 참 정직하고 다정한 옷이었다. 무언가를 억지로 감추려 하지 않은 채, 있는 그대로 그녀의 부드러운 몸의 윤곽을 따라 유연하게 흘러내렸다.
미래는 위에서부터 단추를 하나씩 차분하게 잠갔다. 마지막 단추까지 단정히 채운 뒤에야 전신거울 앞에 섰다.
거울 속 자신을 가만히 바라보던 미래는 이내 가벼운 한숨을 내쉬며 돌아섰다. 오래 들여다보고 있으면 가슴 한구석이 서글퍼질 것만 같았다.
우아한 샤넬 라인 스커트까지 갖춰 입고 거실로 나오자, 주방에서 부지런히 움직이던 정례가 환한 얼굴로 고개를 돌렸다.
"사모님, 오늘 피부과 파티 가시는 날이죠?"
"네, 이모."
"박 대표님이 행사장으로 화환 미리 보내셨다고 아까 연락 왔더라고요."
미래는 하얀 핸드백 안을 슬쩍 확인하며 예쁜 미소를 지어 보였다.
"그냥 얼굴만 비추고 오는 심부름이죠, 뭐."
정례는 하던 일을 잠시 멈추고 미래를 다정하게 바라보았다.
미래가 태어날 때부터 곁에서 성장을 지켜봐 온 정례의 깊은 눈길이 그녀의 아름다운 실루엣을 천천히 훑었다.
마흔셋.
하지만 거울 속 미래의 얼굴은 도무지 그 나이로 보이지 않았다. 작고 동그란 계란형 얼굴에 사랑스러움이 뚝뚝 묻어나는 눈망울. 어릴 적 맑았던 모습 그대로였다.
나이가 들수록 오히려 더 곱고 우아하게 익어가는 보석 같은 사람이 있다면, 바로 안미래였다.
하지만 참 슬프게도 이 집에는 저 도라지꽃처럼 아름다운 얼굴을 다정하게 들여다보고 아껴주는 사람이 없었다. 정례에게는 그것이 늘 마음 한구석에 박힌 가시처럼 아팠다.
"사모님, 오늘 대표님 심부름 가시는 건데 어쩜 이렇게 예쁘세요."
"이모도 참."
"아니에요, 진짜로요. 내가 사모님 아기 때부터 봐왔지만, 요즘이 정말 제일 고우신 것 같아요. 정말로요."
미래는 수줍은 듯 미소를 머금은 채 가죽 장갑을 끼며 현관으로 걸어갔다. 정례는 익숙하고 조심스러운 손길로 코트를 받아 미래의 가녀린 어깨 위에 부드럽게 걸쳐주었다.
어릴 때부터 따뜻하게 외투를 입혀주고, 헝클어진 머리를 빗겨주고, 맛있는 밥을 차려주던 정례의 손길.
친정엄마조차 한 번도 해준 적 없는 포근한 보살핌을, 이 다정한 이모가 전부 채워주었다.
"밖이 많이 추워요, 코트 꼭 예쁘게 여미고 가세요."
"파티장 안이 따뜻해서 내내 입고 있을 수는 없겠지만... 조심히 다녀올게요."
"그래요, 사모님."
엘리베이터 버튼을 누르며 미래는 생각했다.
정례 이모는 늘 그랬다. 말 한마디 안에 온 마음을 꾹꾹 눌러 담아 건넸다. 추우니까 조심하라는 다정한 염려가 단순히 날씨 이야기만은 아니라는 것쯤은 미래도 너무나 잘 알고 있었다.
띵―.
맑은 소리와 함께 문이 열렸다. 로비의 유리문 너머에서 불어온 서늘한 2월의 바람이 미래의 뺨을 스쳤다.
"새로 오신 부원장님 혹시 보셨어요?"
One day, I worked late until the office was almost completely empty.As I was gathering my belongings, my phone vibrated with a text from another unknown number.The message read, "Scarlett, I know you won't forgive me anymore. But I dream of you every single day. I dream of when we first got together. You asked me why I liked you back then, and I said it was because your eyes crinkled when you smiled."That day, you told me that I'm wonderful because you love me. If you ever stopped loving me, it would be because I was no longer wonderful. Now I finally understand. I really am no longer the person you love."Take back all the time we spent together in the past. My only hope now is that you live a good life ahead."I stared at the screen for a long time.Those were words I had indeed said. During our freshman year, he had slipped a hand warmer into my arms on the bleachers and built a snowman for me.His hands were frozen bright red, yet he refused to let me touch them, worried
One day, Elliot cornered me at the company building's entrance and dropped straight to his knees right in front of the evening rush of leaving employees.His knees struck the concrete with a loud, hard thud. He looked up at me with terrifyingly bloodshot eyes. "Scarlett, I beg you! Hit me, yell at me. Do whatever you want! Just as long as you forgive me. I'll never look at another woman for the rest of my life, I swear!"I looked down at him but felt not even the slightest stir of emotion.People passing by slowed their steps, and a few pulled out their phones.I took a half-step back and said flatly, "Get up. This only makes me want to see you less."Elliot kept following me around for the next few days, sending dozens of messages every single day.When I ignored him, he switched numbers to keep texting, and his messages turned from desperate apologies into sentimental memories.He recalled the very first time we held hands back in college and wrote about the first bouquet of f
The text messages popped up one after another, but I deleted them all without opening a single one.I tossed my phone onto the couch.In the kitchen, Mom was braising my favorite ribs, while Dad stood on the balcony squeezing fresh juice for me.At the dinner table, Dad placed a piece of tender meat onto my plate, asking no questions.Mom pushed a bowl of soup toward me. It was completely clean, without a single trace of scallions or cilantro.They never needed to ask what I wanted to eat, because every dish they made was already something I loved.I rested at home for half a month.After polishing my resume, I sent out a few applications and quickly received callbacks.The new company was on the south side of town, just three bus stops away from home.Dad hated seeing me commute, even if it was just a ten-minute bus ride, so he insisted on buying me a car.On my first day of reporting to work, I wore a crisp white shirt, and on my desk sat a small potted plant Mom had tucked
Elliot recalled seeing me waiting in line with boxes at the courier station yesterday. At that time, he had assumed I was just throwing a tantrum.Now, as he stared into the empty apartment, the realization sank in far too late. I wasn't acting out in anger after all.I had truly left."Where's Scarlett?" His voice came out raspy. There wasn't a trace of a smile left on his face.No one answered.The relatives exchanged uneasy glances as the room fell deathly silent.Lexie squeezed her way through the crowd from behind, fully made up.Elliot had specifically instructed the makeup artist to do Lexie's makeup first, and it had been done meticulously.She glanced around the empty house, and her voice softened. "Elliot, how about… I keep everyone entertained with some games first to break the tension?"Elliot whipped his head around instantly. "You think this is a suitable time to play games?"It was the very first time Elliot had ever yelled at her in front of so many people.H
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